In a way, I hate being happy

choppedshyt

choppedshyt

Vinicius is my muse.
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Whenever I’m happy or have a big social circle, I start descending. I eat whatever, stop caring about my diet, start skipping routines. I look like shit in photos and I don’t even care in the moment. It’s like my brain subconsciously becomes bluepilled. I get too comfortable, relaxed. Everything feels "good" so I let go of the discipline, and I don’t even realize it until later when I look back and cringe.

Vs

When I'm depressed, I'm locked the fuck in. I spend any free time I have in the gym or practicing football. I cut out all the goyslop and processed garbage. I start taking my skincare seriously, checking my posture, doing everything I should've been doing when I was happy. It's not even discipline, I'm naturally extremely undisciplined due to my ADHD, it's disgust. I can't even look in the mirror without feeling sick, yet somehow I would take this over being some bluepilled retard with no awareness of his looks or habits.
 
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Dnrd
 
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Relatable
 
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ADHD explains a lot
 
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