Stream Of Consciousness [Megathread]

[john2]

I need to start working out. It has been a year and a half since I have stopped gymcelling.

I'm eating so much unhealthy food everyday, I feel like I might die if I don't do something about this.

 

[Copeful]

i want to buy AquaVIP tbh

 

[Deleted member 7076]

i want to buy AquaVIP tbh

if u get VIP i will bully u everywhere i see u (mods hate me)

 

[Deleted member 7076]

i didnt eat any brazil nuts today and interestingly my boners werent as strong. i think selenium plays a big part in how hard u get

 

[Deleted member 7076]

faurk i want to sleep but i need to train neck and put on my retin a firsts, tiring day

 

[john2]

if u get VIP i will bully u everywhere i see u (mods hate me)

Why would you get hated by people if you pay for the VIP?

 

[Deleted member 6723]

I failed multiple classes cuz I was too focused on Eva

 

[Deleted member 7076]

Why would you get hated by people if you pay for the VIP?

i get soy vibes from people who spend money for coloured pixels

 

[BrendioEEE]

Ranch dressing, water bottles, forks.

 

[Deleted member 7076]

gonna watch some more platees omre dates until i fall asleep.

 

[Deleted member 5818]

feeling ok

 

[stuckneworleans]

I don't know where to dispose the body. FUCK. I didn't want to kill her after using her body

 

[MansNotHot]

Fuck all bluepill/redpill phagots tbhngl

 

[Deleted member 6723]

feeling very anxious tbh

 

[stuckneworleans]

The acid I used was to strong FUCKKK there's a giant hole in my bathtub and on the floor now

 

[john2]

I am obsessed over the mystic chord now.

 

[Deleted member 6939]

Alright, this is it boyos. I've been wanting to create this thread for a long time.

This is the stream of consciousness megathread, like the title says. Consider this to be more of a diary/journal of your thoughts. You can talk about random things in here with generally no reception of hate in return.

Just express/vent your feelings, your current mood, what you're planning to do, what you are doing atm, what you believe in, how you feel, etc. The issue can be random and unrelated. The more replies, the merrier. You can bump this thread whenever you like. Happy posting, brocels.

Why does everyone keep complaining about their looks, I’m serious.
Like is all these people care about is validation and sex from girls?
It’s so annoying, I feel as if no one does this stuff for just the sake of themselves and instead they do it for some goal that really isn’t noble or that great in the end.
Seriously, most of the people I’ve seen on here are literally people that I could see on the street every day they look normal. How are these people suffering so greatly when other people can do just fine with the same looks?
I understand if you are ethnic in a white majority place but besides that like, why bro?
A majority of people on here are so obstinate about what they believe blackpill-wise it boggles my mind.
I’m exhausted bro

 

[Deleted member 7076]

might start using yubo again ngl

 

[BrendioEEE]

I don't know where to dispose the body. FUCK. I didn't want to kill her after using her body

 

[john2]

@Darkstrand @16tyo @Maesthetic @kjsbdfiusdf @金木研 @brbbrah .

I swear I'm not kidding. The night before yesterday's night (during 11/02/21) I was sleeping. And I believe this happened to me in the early morning (so it was after 1 am on the 11th of Feb). I was sleeping and turned out that I was probably lucid dreaming. I felt half conscious/awake and I was half sleeping.

I found myself physically singing/humming the first prelude of this set (the Douloureux dechirant) when I was sleeping -




It was so haunting. But it was a very very beautiful experience at the same time. I felt kind of scared.
As a result of this hauntingly lovely memory, I have decided to learn that first prelude and perform it someday.

 

[john2]

@Darkstrand @16tyo @Maesthetic @kjsbdfiusdf @金木研 @brbbrah .

I swear I'm not kidding. The night before yesterday's night (during 11/02/21) I was sleeping. And I believe this happened to me in the early morning (so it was after 1 am on the 11th of Feb). I was sleeping and turned out that I was probably lucid dreaming. I felt half conscious/awake and I was half sleeping.

I found myself physically singing/humming the first prelude of this set (the Douloureux dechirant) when I was sleeping -




It was so haunting. But it was a very very beautiful experience at the same time. I felt kind of scared.
As a result of this hauntingly lovely memory, I have decided to learn that first prelude and perform it someday.

I really hope I'm not possessed cause I just feel like I'm in fear of something.

 

[Deleted member 5818]

discord account just got fuken banned aids

 

[Deleted member 5893]

fuck the freemasons

 

[Deleted member 1476]

She’s so beautiful I need her

 

[Yliaster]

I used to have death anxiety then I learned about things which exist in this world which is worse than death... then i started having anxiety about that... I then started having what I call life anxiety.. when I learned that the universe stretches for infinity and everything you could possibly think of already exists. that means the worst and the best things you could ever think of exist somewhere..... and infinity versions of yourself exist somewhere... then i started wondering which version am i... i started realizing the true nature of infinity... there is just as likely chance you will wake up tomorrow and the sky will be green. it is actually 50-50 chance with any case scenario... thats the nature of infinity.. then i did some math and realized it doesn't work... so my conclusion is infinity doesn't exist.. and time and space are in a continuous loop. that gives a bit of relief because now i feel that hell doesn't necessarily exist because everything is finite. anyway when im having anxiety and wild thoughts about the nature of the universe, consciousness, what comes after, does god exist, is everything a test, does karma exist, should i sacrifice my comfort to help others... so many questions...

 

[Deleted member 7863]

The secret Black Lesbian Zionist Occupation Government staged 9/11 to create a financial crisis, so that Ben Bernanke would have an excuse to activate quantitative easing. When the Federal Reserve printed money out of thin air, they funneled the funds via BitCoin (Trump's invention) to a secret lab in Los Alamos, in order to fund the construction of a time machine. Barack Obama then hopped in the time machine, went back in time, and killed JFK. They had to get JFK out of the picture. He knew too much. He was the only one who knew that Mattress Warehouse is actually a front for collecting money to pay transgender pedophile crisis actors, who distracted the public while Donald Trump strangled every bird in the world. Why did they want the birds gone? So that the CIA's PRISM program could team up with George Soros and bribe Boston Dynamics to build billions of bird-drones. Birds aren't real. Every time you think you see a bird, it's actually a drone. You think you see bird shit? It's really chemtrails, which are brainwashing the public so we can't realize that vaccines cause global warming. Have you ever seen a 'bird' sitting on a power line? That's because it's a drone, and it's recharging. Do you know that a pigeon once perched on the roof of the North Tower of the World Trade Center? PIGEON SHIT CAN'T MELT STEEL BEAMS. I have no choice but to drop my truth-bombs here, because lizard-person Zuckerberg and his army of gay frogs banned me from TheFaceBook. Checkmate, globalists. WAKE UP, SHEEPLE! Trump is Satoshi!

 

[WadlowMaxxing]

If I could go back to being 8 years old with the knowledge I have now I could become a Demi-god

its a bad feeling thinking about it

 

[Deleted member 7076]

@Darkstrand @16tyo @Maesthetic @kjsbdfiusdf @金木研 @brbbrah .

I swear I'm not kidding. The night before yesterday's night (during 11/02/21) I was sleeping. And I believe this happened to me in the early morning (so it was after 1 am on the 11th of Feb). I was sleeping and turned out that I was probably lucid dreaming. I felt half conscious/awake and I was half sleeping.

I found myself physically singing/humming the first prelude of this set (the Douloureux dechirant) when I was sleeping -




It was so haunting. But it was a very very beautiful experience at the same time. I felt kind of scared.
As a result of this hauntingly lovely memory, I have decided to learn that first prelude and perform it someday.

seems like its a calling for u bro

 

[john2]

seems like its a calling for u bro

Calling for what (srs)?

 

[vaninskybird]

when i first joined and saw that @Ritalincel with 100k rep started following me i legit feared for my life, i thought he was gonna bully me hard

 

[BrendioEEE]

2020 made me an abused dog. It honestly doesn't matter how much I self improve or got better looking, I am seriously fucked up. I wish I could erase everything that happened during that year, I want to be who I was in 2019 even if I have to lose even more weight by going back to that point.

The girl I'm with now, I'm very insecure about, I mean I trust her more than I have ever trusted anyone, and I love her more than I have ever loved anyone and all of that but who I am now because of all the shit that's happened to me I feel like I'm really not good enough for her.

I want to die a lot, I sometimes go crazy and think I'm back in the bad situation I was in with you know who, who constantly talked to people behind my back and cheated on me which made me extremely insecure, in all of my years I never once imagined I'd develop a habit of cutting myself especially at the age of 23/24 and I try not to as much as I can but sometimes the urge is so fucking strong.

Cutting is one of the only things that I really really think brings me back to reality other than the girl I'm with. It's something I crave now. The pain from that is a good distraction from reality I suppose.

I hate that I can't share many details about the girl I'm with because of malicious entities involved with my ex. I'm even afraid to talk about her eye or hair color. I even wonder if me mentioning she's taller than me and white was too much information or the fact she's much closer than anyone.

At the end of the day I just want affection and love and fulfillment. I just want to feel satisified or I think I'm going to go insane.

I also want to buy a home with the girl I love but because of how things are in America these prospects just feel so far.

I really need something because honestly I hope I don't even wake up when I go to sleep.

I have to wonder if the only thing to truly look forward to is full dive VR and advancements in AI and who even knows when things like that will exist with how the world is. At the earliest something will arise by 2030 but who knows.

My chest is pounding right now, I think if it weren't for the cardio I have done I'd have died of a heart attack long ago.

 

[Deleted member 5522]

Today I bought milk

 

[john2]

Today, I broke my supposedly long nofap streak out of foolishness. I feel really really bad rn.

Either have sex with a woman or be celibate. Masturbation is a cucked and unnatural act.

 

[getra]

I am a hypocrite

 

[BrendioEEE]

I don't feel good enough for the girl I'm with, and I want to do more to prove I am and that I truly love her. Abused dog moment but if I did somehow genuinely lose her, like if she died or something it would be 100% over for me because I'd be losing someone who I connect with more than I ever have in my life.

 

[alligatordude]

Bro I just be vibin
even still after reading this thread

 

[alligatordude]

It’s getting to lunch time as I think I’m going to order Chinese food

more specifically general Tao chicken with chicken fried rice, for it is very good tasting, and great bang for buck value out of all food places in my area

 

[Deepraj7]

I went to the highschool spring festival , although I'm a high school pass-out and now in college , i really wanted to go with my old pals so that I could get a glimpse of the girl I really loved but couldn't say anything just because I'm too ugly and feel like I would be made fun of and become a meme in the school and don't embarass myself . I spent two hours looking for her but could not find her . I started looking for familiar faces so that I have better time looking for her and after 3 hours I saw the most priced face I've ever saw I started staring at her in a good way taking time off so that others don't creep out . She was off some distance she walked beside me my heartbeat went up and walked away with her friend with me standing there with an old pal of mine. I wish I was good looking so that I could approach her . But life ain't fair and the blackpill always stand still

 

[john2]

Brocels, I got my first pay ever yesterday. I'm 18. It was through my voluntary experience by tutoring.
It wasn't too much, but it was quite unexpected and I am grateful for it. Feels good man.

 

[AlwaysHaveQuestions]

yikes sweaty

 

[john2]

It is OVER for me.

Ever since I last relapsed I couldn't do nofap past a week.
It feels so bad knowing that I did go over a month with ease before.

 

[whiteissuperior]

We can hit bout ia

 

[Zradrad]

I hate literally everything our late stage capitalist society. Everything including art and relationships with others have been commodified and have no real value. I've been blessed with many things in life yet still want to end it all (won't though). It's all drudgery.

Classical music-cels proceed with caution

 

[john2]

Classical music-cels proceed with caution

Mirin your taste. Unfortunately I am not a fan of Bartok's music, cause it has the 20th century dissonance and tone clusters which feel unpleasant. I like Scriabin, Roslavets, Ravel, Stravinsky etc. How long have you been listening to this? Have you heard of Ravel's quartet in F major? I find the last movement of that work really cool. Should check it out. I'll give Bartok's music a try though. Where should I start tho?

 

[Deleted member 7125]

I just can't do it anymore, there is so much stress and I can't cope with how happy everyone around me is

 

[Deleted member 12303]

i coomed again today didnt want to it was my choice i am in full control will never slip up again

 

[Zradrad]

Mirin your taste. Unfortunately I am not a fan of Bartok's music, cause it has the 20th century dissonance and tone clusters which feel unpleasant. I like Scriabin, Roslavets, Ravel, Stravinsky etc. How long have you been listening to this? Have you heard of Ravel's quartet in F major? I find the last movement of that work really cool. Should check it out. I'll give Bartok's music a try though. Where should I start tho?

That's fair, it is an aquired taste tbf. Must've started listening to this sort of thing a couple years ago at 16 so I'm very used to it now. Can't say I'm the biggest fan of Scriabin and have never heard of Roslavets, but the others i like. I especially love Stravinsky with his works such as Rite of Spring, the Firebird, and Petroushka. Ravel is decent and i do enjoy his string quartet but don't listen frequently.

In terms of Bartok's music, I only really listen to his string quartets but I think there's a lot to appreciate once you can tolerate the tone clusters. His harmonic style is very unique.

I'd also reccomend Messiaen's Turangalila Symphony if you don't know it already.


However, my favourite composer overall is actually Bach and I really enjoy baroque music.

 

[BrendioEEE]

Test cool OK well I guess some gonna get some gonna talk gonna Light bulbs and shit and kinda hungry but scratches on the wall tap tap you know wild tomorrow is the next update for Call of Duty a warzone I hope it's good I hope it's good but you never know it probably is not gonna be good you know black Ops cold war is absolutely trash game it sucks dog doodoo in donkey Dick But with that being sad Honestly I played black Ops cold war during the Beta and it was a trash game and then I played it again in the free week because I will never buy that trash game and I managed to get gold for the knife so that I could have a golden black Ops knife in warzone And drink the next Call of Duty free week but it was a free weekend They did it for zombies mode only and when I install the game to play it it said I have been permanently banned So honestly treyarch are a bunch of dumb nigger retards But luckily I am not banned from modern warfare not yet anyway But it really does suck that I cannot unlock weapons very easily or unlock weapons skins very easily and they have basically completely Removed my ability to even consider purchasing black Ops cold war for no reason whatsoever I didn't even do anything wrong during the free weekend Also I hope that the content in the new warzone update is good zombies content and hopefully you can get zombies weapon skins by playing the zombies mode in war zone that would be epic but a suppose it might be unlikely Dragonball dragonball dragonball Beckett Beckett collector Looks Maxx. me Possibly an Orange cup Possibly an Orange cup Bring me the read more likely Orange Kind of tired right now but honestly scan hard to sleep Blood I have blood on my illo Overwatch junk rats Rats are ATT rats rats rats rats rats rats tape tape tape notifications notifications notifications notifications honestly did him really I'm really I'm really I'm really I'm really I'm really really really really really really really really really really really really Home toniata zamas

 

[BrendioEEE]

I'm pretty sad right now not gonna lie pretty sad sad boy hours and staff that sucks also the reason why no you know what I am not gonna tell you why my post looks retarded you can probably guess that on your own if you have a high enough IQ TB H not gonna lie nickel nickel May M pretty sad right now and feeling Um so yeah that's pretty that's pretty rough sad and stuff but you know it is what it is I bet things are gonna be epic As time goes on and Honestly I really really really love I really really really love My girl my princess she's so special to me That's pretty cool Still pretty sad though because I'm inside boy moments now and I'm not sure how I can get back to normal it is what it is I guess

 

[RecessedCel5]

I'm pretty sad right now not gonna lie pretty sad sad boy hours and staff that sucks also the reason why no you know what I am not gonna tell you why my post looks retarded you can probably guess that on your own if you have a high enough IQ TB H not gonna lie nickel nickel May M pretty sad right now and feeling Um so yeah that's pretty that's pretty rough sad and stuff but you know it is what it is I bet things are gonna be epic As time goes on and Honestly I really really really love I really really really love My girl my princess she's so special to me That's pretty cool Still pretty sad though because I'm inside boy moments now and I'm not sure how I can get back to normal it is what it is I guess

you got cheated on again ?