This life is so empty

[coke]

if you did, you'd find out that I'm awkward and boring
I'm 22 now, the development of my personality is finished, and I did not develop into someone who is charismatic or witty or funny
which is why I fixate on looks, because I hope they can compensate for my shit personality


lol
what kind of logic is that
if you want it, you deserve it?
that's not how this world works


there must have been something inherent about me when I became the loser of the class when I was a kid


I don't really have hobbies, and even if I did pursue them, they are antisocial in nature
and even if I did meet people, I would fail to create any friendships or relationships
that ship has sailed, I'm not able to make friends anymore

Generally I'm sorry. Very unfortunate mental health you've been dealt with. I do hope in the future it works out better for you.

''which is why I fixate on looks, because I hope they can compensate for my shit personality''

That is entirely noticeable, and honestly you're one of the first people on this website that I wouldn't want to waste my time associating with, and I don't even know you personally. That's probably heavy reflective even more so in the real world and would be a turn off for anyone. Work on yourself and in the future I genuinely believe with the right help, it'll get better for you.

 

[Mongrelcel]

honestly you're one of the first people on this website that I wouldn't want to waste my time associating with

didn't you want to take me camping yesterday?
and now I'm trash to you
jfl

Work on yourself and in the future I genuinely believe with the right help, it'll get better for you

"work on yourself"
another empty phrase

as if I could "improve" my personality like you can improve your body in the gym
once you are past your teenage years or even early teenage years, your personality is pretty much set
if you're introverted, you will be so for the rest of your life

you can change some small things, but not the most important ones
all the most charismatic people already were showing signs when they were young
do you think Eddie Murphy was a shy introvert when he was 16? by 22 he was who we all know and was selling out stadiums with his standup comedy

do you genuinely believe that a dry awkward incel, who is already in his twenties, can become the life of the party chad?

if so, why don't depressed people just "become" not depressed? or people with PTSD? why don't they just "work on themselves"?

if personality is so malleable as you claim?

why arent we all as funny as standup comedians? we practice every time we joke and talk with friends no? so why are some so much funnier than others?

and that's just the social skills - I'm not even talking about the mountain of experiences I had alrady missed that normies experience during their teenage years

 

[Mongrelcel]

Generally I'm sorry. Very unfortunate mental health you've been dealt with. I do hope in the future it works out better for you.

''which is why I fixate on looks, because I hope they can compensate for my shit personality''

That is entirely noticeable, and honestly you're one of the first people on this website that I wouldn't want to waste my time associating with, and I don't even know you personally. That's probably heavy reflective even more so in the real world and would be a turn off for anyone. Work on yourself and in the future I genuinely believe with the right help, it'll get better for you.

also, it's not just about the social skills themselves, because they can to some capacity be learned

it's about the fact the pathways in my brain have after years of living like a dog developed in such as a way, that I get no enjoyment from interacting with people, there is no dopamine in my brain from talking to others
social interactions are just tiring to me, I'm not designed to spend time with people
unlike for you I assume, for who social interactions are an activity of relaxation, of enjoyment

just like an autist has his brain wired in a different way, I have too
and you can't "work on that" or "practice it"
if I could, I would

 

[Deleted member 19036]

I can really relate to this.
I will never really have this either. Maybe it's just not meant to be for some of us autists.

over. whats your reason to hold onto life?

 

[Mongrelcel]

over. whats your reason to hold onto life?

holding onto it as if he was able to just choose at any time to have a different one?

are you stupid or something?

 

[Deleted member 19036]

holding onto it as if he was able to just choose at any time to have a different one?

are you stupid or something?

just kys if you dont wanna live

 

[coke]

didn't you want to take me camping yesterday?
and now I'm trash to you
jfl


"work on yourself"
another empty phrase

as if I could "improve" my personality like you can improve your body in the gym
once you are past your teenage years or even early teenage years, your personality is pretty much set
if you're introverted, you will be so for the rest of your life

you can change some small things, but not the most important ones
all the most charismatic people already were showing signs when they were young
do you think Eddie Murphy was a shy introvert when he was 16? by 22 he was who we all know and was selling out stadiums with his standup comedy

do you genuinely believe that a dry awkward incel, who is already in his twenties, can become the life of the party chad?

if so, why don't depressed people just "become" not depressed? or people with PTSD? why don't they just "work on themselves"?

if personality is so malleable as you claim?

why arent we all as funny as standup comedians? we practice every time we joke and talk with friends no? so why are some so much funnier than others?

and that's just the social skills - I'm not even talking about the mountain of experiences I had alrady missed that normies experience during their teenage years

Absolutely, I'd take you camping, after I seen your first message I felt genuinely bad. But what I said was an example to how other people would feel, what I was stating is your continuous responses of self-loating and the constant attempt at rationalising your poisonous mind-set makes me not want to associate with you on a forum, so I can imagine why it's difficult for you in person. If I met someone self-loathing, I'd give them a chance, I have done with multiple people, but repeatedly? I'd want them to get help. It's dangerous, humans are dangerous. I went through school always chilling with the lonely guys and pulling them in my group. Some of the smartest motherfuckers suffer with social skills, but hell are they ambitious/intelligent.

Anything involving work is empty to you, all anyone can do is hope you find a direction for yourself.

Makes me think of my ex nerdy anime friend, Charlie. Bunked off school due to being bullied, sat self-loathing drinking and eating his teenage years away. I heard about him through a family friend, one hell of a fucking drummer. Turns out he had no friends, just his mother and cousin. I asked him to join me and my buddies band just before covid, he said no, he wanted to just keep sitting inside gaming and shitting his miserable life and talent away aged 23. I persisted and eventually he joined. Today we play small venues trying to grow as a band, we're a 4-piece, and fuck yeah he's the life of the party. I'm 5'10, he's 6'2, I know he always has my back in life too as a token of respect. I helped him, he helps me, he's my Krist Novoselic. I've watched him shed his weight, quit drinking, get girls and have ambition. A long way from that nerd who couldn't string a sentence and wouldn't leave the house when I met him. It took him a while, but he got there.

Maybe it's your location, the people you chose to surround yourself with, all I can say is I'm very sorry. If I told you right now it's because your head is mis-shaped or you need an extra cm in your nasal tip, you'd probably believe me. But I hope one day you realise this whole perspective you've created is flawed, and those who go along with that on here are in the exact same boat as you.

 

[coke]

also, it's not just about the social skills themselves, because they can to some capacity be learned

it's about the fact the pathways in my brain have after years of living like a dog developed in such as a way, that I get no enjoyment from interacting with people, there is no dopamine in my brain from talking to others
social interactions are just tiring to me, I'm not designed to spend time with people
unlike for you I assume, for who social interactions are an activity of relaxation, of enjoyment

just like an autist has his brain wired in a different way, I have too
and you can't "work on that" or "practice it"
if I could, I would

Also stop adding chad to everything. You don't need to be a chad to be the life of a party, you can be a normie and be known as a really fun dude.

Go out in nature, head to bars, go watch some music concerts and watch how people interact, learn from it and start just saying hello to people. The issue is, you get no dopamine talking to others, so you just genuinely don't like people. Maybe you're trying to create looks to make people appreciate you, but without that dopamine from talking to others, it doesn't matter if you look like a god, no one wants to associate with that. Work on your mental health and social skills before anything. I know I keep saying it as if it's easy, but I genuinely believe everything in life is hard, and if it's not naturally permitted to you eventually it can be. Maybe you just need another couple of years before it sparks, but it will.

You know sometimes though I do get tired after social interaction, it's completely normal. But commonly yes, it's enjoyable. I enjoy being around others and doing things. But I can completely understand how if no one associated with me and I was trapped in my room for years, I'd lose social skills. But I wouldn't give up, I'd get back out there somehow.

 

[metagross]

over. whats your reason to hold onto life?

There's a very tiny bit of hope left for me to looksmax to HTN level. Some users who I sent my photo to on looksmax told me it should be easily possible. (Trusted long-time users here).
So I have some hope. Other than that, I am also afraid of dying, so suicide would not be an option anyway.

 

[height]

Smoke opium

 

[PrimoMaxxer]

bump