heightmaxxing
I want a perfect body I want a perfect soul
- Joined
- Sep 24, 2023
- Posts
- 5,208
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THIS IS NOT ABOUT ME THIS IS SOME RANDOM GUY ON REDDIT
Let me preface this with saying that I am incapable of ever harming a child, i know i can have sick thoughts sometimes but the idea of causing one any harm at all rots me to my very core, and I'm not one of those sickos that thinks "oh, its not harmful, she'll like being touched there"
Today i saw a little girl, probably around 5 or 6, not extraordinarily cute but she had these like knee high boots and I thought "damn"
I am a pedophile, while I am attracted to girls of my own age, i do have fantasies involving younger girls. the youngest ive ever thought of has been 4
I go to mcdonalds around noon on sundays to see little girls in their church dresses with adorable little white stockings and those tiny black shoes
I have watched my neighbors daughter grow up since she was 3 and aroused by thoughts of fooling around with her. I saw her yesterday (shes around 8 or 9) and thought to myself "god I want to fucking tounge her asshole"
I have masturbated to pictures of preteens in underwear and of girls as young as 4 in tight bathing suits
My number 1 most fapped to picture is of chole moretz at 11 in the school girl outfit from kickass
I am only attracted to girls, some people say pedophiles only care about age and are attracted to boys and girls but I don't belive that for a second.
I have seen actual CP, but only when i was 17 first discovering limewire, i did masturbate to it but i instantly delated it and scrubbed my hard drive and its one of my greatest personal shames, I have never searched out for the "real thing" again
I have talked to multiple therapist about this,
what i think it comes down to is that i was really shy and awkward growing up. I'm 24 and I've never had a girlfreind, this has stunted me emotionally. Deep down when I think of the kind of relationship I want sex is barley a part of it, i want to hold hands on the swing set and blush when we kiss each other on the cheek. its pathetic i know (at least I'm not one of those "adult baby" people lol) but since I'm still an adult man with needs the wires are crossed and my want for a more innocent puppy love relationship has intercepted my basic physiological need for sexual contact.
I don't always fantasize about girls, only when i see them, or about 10% of the time when masturbating. I feel bad afterward but my fantasies about them are usually peaceful and loving, very gentle, about pleasuring her etc.
I feel like I should be more ashamed of my lusts but I think what I really want is a daughter, i would have a wife to satisfy me sexually and I could poor all my pent up "innocent cutesy love" onto her
Let me preface this with saying that I am incapable of ever harming a child, i know i can have sick thoughts sometimes but the idea of causing one any harm at all rots me to my very core, and I'm not one of those sickos that thinks "oh, its not harmful, she'll like being touched there"
Today i saw a little girl, probably around 5 or 6, not extraordinarily cute but she had these like knee high boots and I thought "damn"
I am a pedophile, while I am attracted to girls of my own age, i do have fantasies involving younger girls. the youngest ive ever thought of has been 4
I go to mcdonalds around noon on sundays to see little girls in their church dresses with adorable little white stockings and those tiny black shoes
I have watched my neighbors daughter grow up since she was 3 and aroused by thoughts of fooling around with her. I saw her yesterday (shes around 8 or 9) and thought to myself "god I want to fucking tounge her asshole"
I have masturbated to pictures of preteens in underwear and of girls as young as 4 in tight bathing suits
My number 1 most fapped to picture is of chole moretz at 11 in the school girl outfit from kickass
I am only attracted to girls, some people say pedophiles only care about age and are attracted to boys and girls but I don't belive that for a second.
I have seen actual CP, but only when i was 17 first discovering limewire, i did masturbate to it but i instantly delated it and scrubbed my hard drive and its one of my greatest personal shames, I have never searched out for the "real thing" again
I have talked to multiple therapist about this,
what i think it comes down to is that i was really shy and awkward growing up. I'm 24 and I've never had a girlfreind, this has stunted me emotionally. Deep down when I think of the kind of relationship I want sex is barley a part of it, i want to hold hands on the swing set and blush when we kiss each other on the cheek. its pathetic i know (at least I'm not one of those "adult baby" people lol) but since I'm still an adult man with needs the wires are crossed and my want for a more innocent puppy love relationship has intercepted my basic physiological need for sexual contact.
I don't always fantasize about girls, only when i see them, or about 10% of the time when masturbating. I feel bad afterward but my fantasies about them are usually peaceful and loving, very gentle, about pleasuring her etc.
I feel like I should be more ashamed of my lusts but I think what I really want is a daughter, i would have a wife to satisfy me sexually and I could poor all my pent up "innocent cutesy love" onto her