Bitch
- Joined
- Mar 6, 2020
- Posts
- 23,029
- Reputation
- 28,442
The 10 % of my life where I was able to find some happiness were the first 2 years at my old high school. I actually had friends, I was talking to girls, I had a girlfriend (who dumped me not a long time after, but still, I had some luck).
People actually liked me, not everybody, but I'd say 70 % of my classmates would find me likeable.
The school that I go to now, I only have 9 classmates, I used to have 24 in my old school, so there were higher chances of me actually finding some people that have similar interests and there were 20 girls, and only 5 of us boys.
The school that I go to now, there's 3 boys (including me) and 7 girls. 5 girls actually have boyfriends that I know of, and the other 2 girls are claiming that they are texting some people and they are probably massive whores and would not be interested in me at all, "muhh I only date 6'+" and shit like that, meanwhile they are like 5'5 max.
I used to be happy, I am pretty anti social and socially inept and I was able to make friends with people who also played guitar, and we jammed together after classes and shit, talk about music, music theory, vidya and that type of nerd shit...
People at my old school were massive nerds and they came from upper middle class families, just like me. Their parents were also well-educated respectable people, many were doctors, lawyers, teachers, judges and so on, and they were much more high IQ than my current classmates. It was kind of an elite school.
But the problem is you needed to study extremely hard to make it in this type of an "elite school." Well, I unfortunately failed to do so, so I had to get "demoted" to another school or "downgrade" if that makes sense, purely because of math, which is known to be the most difficult subject in these types of schools.
My current classmates are mostly lower-class peasants. They behave like low IQ apes, they have no filter whatsoever. I am the actual smartest in all of the subjects, except in math, because that is the main reason why I failed my old "elite school". I wasn't paying attention to math classes for a whole year and just slept when we had Zoom meetings.
Every day when I come home I just want to sleep because that is the only thing that makes me happy. I cope with alcohol sometimes too, I love it when I drink alcohol and it makes socializing so much easier. I don't have a lot of money though so I just take the alcohol from my house, and also my dad hates me because "I am lazy".
I couldn't imagine him putting up with so much shit and insecurity that I have to put up with every day. He was one of the tallest boys in middle - high school, also had a forward grown mandible and curly hair, so a legit chadlite.
Women don't respect me at all, they view me as inferior, a subhuman.
I have zero motivation to study now, I am fucked up during the day because I stay up long in the night and I just masturbate like 5 times, listen to music for 3 hours and play vidya or watch youtube all the time.
I feel like fucking shit right now, my adrenaline crashed to fucking 0, I am having caffeine withdrawals, my head hurts, my eyes are watery, I can't think straight. I feel zero emotions, other than emptiness and pretty high levels of anxiety.
People actually liked me, not everybody, but I'd say 70 % of my classmates would find me likeable.
The school that I go to now, I only have 9 classmates, I used to have 24 in my old school, so there were higher chances of me actually finding some people that have similar interests and there were 20 girls, and only 5 of us boys.
The school that I go to now, there's 3 boys (including me) and 7 girls. 5 girls actually have boyfriends that I know of, and the other 2 girls are claiming that they are texting some people and they are probably massive whores and would not be interested in me at all, "muhh I only date 6'+" and shit like that, meanwhile they are like 5'5 max.
I used to be happy, I am pretty anti social and socially inept and I was able to make friends with people who also played guitar, and we jammed together after classes and shit, talk about music, music theory, vidya and that type of nerd shit...
People at my old school were massive nerds and they came from upper middle class families, just like me. Their parents were also well-educated respectable people, many were doctors, lawyers, teachers, judges and so on, and they were much more high IQ than my current classmates. It was kind of an elite school.
But the problem is you needed to study extremely hard to make it in this type of an "elite school." Well, I unfortunately failed to do so, so I had to get "demoted" to another school or "downgrade" if that makes sense, purely because of math, which is known to be the most difficult subject in these types of schools.
My current classmates are mostly lower-class peasants. They behave like low IQ apes, they have no filter whatsoever. I am the actual smartest in all of the subjects, except in math, because that is the main reason why I failed my old "elite school". I wasn't paying attention to math classes for a whole year and just slept when we had Zoom meetings.
Every day when I come home I just want to sleep because that is the only thing that makes me happy. I cope with alcohol sometimes too, I love it when I drink alcohol and it makes socializing so much easier. I don't have a lot of money though so I just take the alcohol from my house, and also my dad hates me because "I am lazy".
I couldn't imagine him putting up with so much shit and insecurity that I have to put up with every day. He was one of the tallest boys in middle - high school, also had a forward grown mandible and curly hair, so a legit chadlite.
Women don't respect me at all, they view me as inferior, a subhuman.
I have zero motivation to study now, I am fucked up during the day because I stay up long in the night and I just masturbate like 5 times, listen to music for 3 hours and play vidya or watch youtube all the time.
I feel like fucking shit right now, my adrenaline crashed to fucking 0, I am having caffeine withdrawals, my head hurts, my eyes are watery, I can't think straight. I feel zero emotions, other than emptiness and pretty high levels of anxiety.
Last edited:
, capitalist society is merciless and brutal
