D
Deleted member 4645
Retired
- Joined
- Jan 7, 2020
- Posts
- 6,131
- Reputation
- 15,920
tl;dr I was planning to give my now ex a Switch for his bday. Due to quarantine I was never able to give the console. I ended our relationship sometime after he threw a tantrum over his leftover chicken mcNuggets. I decided not to give him the Switch anymore since I don't wanna enable his entitled behavior but he was upset about it and he's making me feel guilty.
I was planning to give my now ex a Nintendo Switch for his birthday in March (we were still a couple). My job isn't that great so buying this wasn't easy on my savings. I was keeping it a surprise, so he had no idea. I couldn't be there on his birthday due to work and quarantine but it was bad. He was expecting to be treated like a king and was upset at me and his family for not making it feel special. He said his family barely celebrated (they cooked typical party food, just nothing too fancy), and he was very angry with me for being busy on his birthday (it was a weekday so I had work; he's unemployed by choice so he was free).
We fought all day and he only calmed down when I told him I got him a Switch for his birthday. I also got him a digital copy of Animal Crossing on his Nintendo account (he had one from his 3DS). Suddenly he was all apologetic and started acting sweet. I told him I can't give it to him yet (and until now the console is still with me) due to quarantine and the couriers in our country (3rd world) can't be trusted with such an expensive package. Something about his behavior really threw me off and I started thinking twice about the relationship.
The last straw was a few months after that he was upset at his family for days, calling them worthless behind their backs just because they ate a few of his chicken mcNuggets and wanted them to "spoil" him to make things even. I asked isn't he spoiled enough since:
I already gave him a high end phone last year for no occasion. I don't want to give him any more because I feel like it'll just enable his entitled behavior, and without a job I'm worried he'll irresponsibly spend on games instead of striving for independence. AITA?
EDIT:
Wow I posted this before going to bed and didn't expect it to blow up. Thank you very much kind strangers for the awards, I've never gotten any before! Thanks to everyone too for your inputs and judgements. You have put my mind at ease.
Some things to clarify:
I was planning to give my now ex a Nintendo Switch for his birthday in March (we were still a couple). My job isn't that great so buying this wasn't easy on my savings. I was keeping it a surprise, so he had no idea. I couldn't be there on his birthday due to work and quarantine but it was bad. He was expecting to be treated like a king and was upset at me and his family for not making it feel special. He said his family barely celebrated (they cooked typical party food, just nothing too fancy), and he was very angry with me for being busy on his birthday (it was a weekday so I had work; he's unemployed by choice so he was free).
We fought all day and he only calmed down when I told him I got him a Switch for his birthday. I also got him a digital copy of Animal Crossing on his Nintendo account (he had one from his 3DS). Suddenly he was all apologetic and started acting sweet. I told him I can't give it to him yet (and until now the console is still with me) due to quarantine and the couriers in our country (3rd world) can't be trusted with such an expensive package. Something about his behavior really threw me off and I started thinking twice about the relationship.
The last straw was a few months after that he was upset at his family for days, calling them worthless behind their backs just because they ate a few of his chicken mcNuggets and wanted them to "spoil" him to make things even. I asked isn't he spoiled enough since:
- he already lives for free in his sister's house
- he's the only one with his own room. 9 of them are living in that house with only 3 rooms
- his family cooks but he buys food instead if he dislikes it
- he only got to buy the food from money gifted to him by his sister
I already gave him a high end phone last year for no occasion. I don't want to give him any more because I feel like it'll just enable his entitled behavior, and without a job I'm worried he'll irresponsibly spend on games instead of striving for independence. AITA?
EDIT:
Wow I posted this before going to bed and didn't expect it to blow up. Thank you very much kind strangers for the awards, I've never gotten any before! Thanks to everyone too for your inputs and judgements. You have put my mind at ease.
Some things to clarify:
- I got the Animal Crossing on his Nintendo account so I'd rather not keep it on the console. If he wants to play it he can always get a job and buy his own console in the future.
- Thank you so much for your inputs but please don't hate the guy. He's not 100% bad, but I had to limit what I write to what's relevant. Entitlement issues aside he's not really an evil person, he can still be kind on a good mood and is a gentleman in public. I have faith he can still turn his life around if he wanted to. I won't stick around to find out if he actually does though. We no longer talk nowadays.
- He accepted my decision not to give him the Switch, though it came with a lot of insults and guilt tripping. He insisted I was "taking it back" and not just "no longer giving it". He threatened to take back his stuff that he's already given me in the past year and got more upset at me when I agreed (I didn't even ask to take back my stuff) instead of giving him the switch. He was wording it to imply that he understands that I'd want to take it back because I've always been a cold unloving partner caring more about money than anything else to make me feel guilty. I already spent all my free time outside work hours talking to him and I never ask him for anything (in fact I discourage him from spending on me, I've always paid for my own stuff) so I didn't really believe it, but he would say things like that to me often so I was starting to doubt myself thus the post.
- For anyone interested I will most likely give the switch to a relative.
