AITA for excluding my autistic stepdaughter from my daughter's birthday party?

[Deleted member 78221]

My (30F) daughter's (8F) birthday is next week and we're planning on having a party for her and inviting around 20 other kids. I also have a stepdaughter (7F) from my marriage to my husband (38M), and she desperately wants to come. However, the thing is, she has a history of not behaving at birthday parties. She acts younger than her age and doesn't understand social cues. She's been invited to three of her classmates birthday parties in the past. At one of those parties, she blew out the candles, and at the other two parties, she started crying when she wasn't able to blow out the candles. Eventually people stopped inviting her to their parties, and she claims it makes her feel left out.

I decided it would be best if my stepdaughter didn't come. She would either blow out the candles or have a tantrum, and either way she would ruin the day for my daughter. My husband is furious with me, saying I'm deliberately excluding her for being autistic. He says she already feels excluded from her classmates parties, but excluding her from her own stepsister's party would be even more cruel. I told him it was my daughter's special day, and I had to prioritise her feelings first.

AITA?

 

[Gaygymmaxx]

Yes just leave them unsocialized and it will go fine

No trauma

 

[Deleted member 78221]

Yes just leave them unsocialized and it will go fine

No trauma

what a piece of shit mother seriously. Women have no empathy

 

[Gaygymmaxx]

what a piece of shit mother seriously. Women have no empathy

She does have empathy for her own genes

But not her husband's offspring

Rather bad tbh, especially cuz she prob lives in that house jfl

 

[Deleted member 78221]

She does have empathy for her own genes

But not her husband's offspring

Rather bad tbh, especially cuz she prob lives in that house jfl

dunno but just imagine this girl isn't invited to her classmates parties either lol

she'll probably rope in the future and then her stepmother would be saying "we never knew she was depwressed"

 

[Deleted member 24554]

Id just let her blow out the candles after

 

[ElySioNs]

My (30F) daughter's (8F) birthday is next week and we're planning on having a party for her and inviting around 20 other kids. I also have a stepdaughter (7F) from my marriage to my husband (38M), and she desperately wants to come. However, the thing is, she has a history of not behaving at birthday parties. She acts younger than her age and doesn't understand social cues. She's been invited to three of her classmates birthday parties in the past. At one of those parties, she blew out the candles, and at the other two parties, she started crying when she wasn't able to blow out the candles. Eventually people stopped inviting her to their parties, and she claims it makes her feel left out.

I decided it would be best if my stepdaughter didn't come. She would either blow out the candles or have a tantrum, and either way she would ruin the day for my daughter. My husband is furious with me, saying I'm deliberately excluding her for being autistic. He says she already feels excluded from her classmates parties, but excluding her from her own stepsister's party would be even more cruel. I told him it was my daughter's special day, and I had to prioritise her feelings first.

AITA?

As a single mother who has 2 lovely children and has 10 cats, YTA