ElySioNs
Mercenary
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2021
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My (35M) wife (25F) tragically died in a motor vehicle accident recently. I was devastated at the time, we were planning on starting a family as I am earning a 6 figure salary now and we could afford our dream home and white picket fence happy ending.
After her death I had the arduous task of collecting and compiling all her belongings. All her trinkets, items from her hobbies (she loved to do crafts), her gratitude journals (which I didn't read of course). There was also her phone that had survived the crash. We had an open phone policy as our trust was solid. Or so I thought. I opened her phone and started going through her photos - photos of us, selfies of her beautiful face, our dog, her crafts and inspirations. When, suddenly, a message popped up.
"I can't believe you're gone babe. I know you'll never read this but I just want you to know how much I'm going to miss you." I opened her messages and there it was: months and months of texting and sexting between her and a co-worker. Selfies, nudes, you name it (my wife was a 34DD). I also discovered the "secret" folder she kept all their photos and videos together in. The videos were explicit and heartbreaking, something no husband should ever see.
I don't know what devastated me more - her dying or finding out she'd been sleeping with someone else for almost a year. During this time I had to plan her funeral, deal with her family and act the grieving husband, when inside I was ready to scream her betrayal to the heavens.
With two days left until her funeral, I made the decision. I painstakingly compiled every piece of evidence from her phone. I printed out the entirety of their texts and placed them in binders. I put the explicit photos and videos at the end of the PowerPoint presentation made to remember her life.
The day of the funeral. Sombre, tearful. Her dad did the eulogy and we listened to her favourite song. Finally, I asked to say my piece. I began with the presentation, taking my time scrolling through photos of her, of us, her childhood, her awkward teen years. I admit, the feelings for her were overwhelming and I almost considered backing out. But then I remembered the videos of my wife being veritably railed and the anger trumped any nostalgic feelings I may have let win that day.
I finally asked my brother to hand out the binders to her family members (he was unaware of their contents). I waited while they began paging through, their eyes widening, a gasp coming from her mother. Then, I played the last part of the presentation: the photos of her with her co-worker kissing and being intimate. I took the mic and said "And after everything, this is what she left me with, and now I leave it with you too. I don't see why I should carry this alone while you sing her praises." Mic drop. I left the church and drove home.
Naturally my phone began blowing up. Her family members calling me despicable, disgusting, soiling her memory, every curse under the sun. Yet my brother and parents have told me they agree with my late wife's family that I was the asshole in this situation. I am satisfied with my decision, but I'd like to know if outsiders would consider this morally justified.
So Reddit, AITA?
TL;DR: I found out after my wife's death she'd been cheating on me for nearly a year. I exposed all the evidence at her funeral and am being labelled asshole of the year.
After her death I had the arduous task of collecting and compiling all her belongings. All her trinkets, items from her hobbies (she loved to do crafts), her gratitude journals (which I didn't read of course). There was also her phone that had survived the crash. We had an open phone policy as our trust was solid. Or so I thought. I opened her phone and started going through her photos - photos of us, selfies of her beautiful face, our dog, her crafts and inspirations. When, suddenly, a message popped up.
"I can't believe you're gone babe. I know you'll never read this but I just want you to know how much I'm going to miss you." I opened her messages and there it was: months and months of texting and sexting between her and a co-worker. Selfies, nudes, you name it (my wife was a 34DD). I also discovered the "secret" folder she kept all their photos and videos together in. The videos were explicit and heartbreaking, something no husband should ever see.
I don't know what devastated me more - her dying or finding out she'd been sleeping with someone else for almost a year. During this time I had to plan her funeral, deal with her family and act the grieving husband, when inside I was ready to scream her betrayal to the heavens.
With two days left until her funeral, I made the decision. I painstakingly compiled every piece of evidence from her phone. I printed out the entirety of their texts and placed them in binders. I put the explicit photos and videos at the end of the PowerPoint presentation made to remember her life.
The day of the funeral. Sombre, tearful. Her dad did the eulogy and we listened to her favourite song. Finally, I asked to say my piece. I began with the presentation, taking my time scrolling through photos of her, of us, her childhood, her awkward teen years. I admit, the feelings for her were overwhelming and I almost considered backing out. But then I remembered the videos of my wife being veritably railed and the anger trumped any nostalgic feelings I may have let win that day.
I finally asked my brother to hand out the binders to her family members (he was unaware of their contents). I waited while they began paging through, their eyes widening, a gasp coming from her mother. Then, I played the last part of the presentation: the photos of her with her co-worker kissing and being intimate. I took the mic and said "And after everything, this is what she left me with, and now I leave it with you too. I don't see why I should carry this alone while you sing her praises." Mic drop. I left the church and drove home.
Naturally my phone began blowing up. Her family members calling me despicable, disgusting, soiling her memory, every curse under the sun. Yet my brother and parents have told me they agree with my late wife's family that I was the asshole in this situation. I am satisfied with my decision, but I'd like to know if outsiders would consider this morally justified.
So Reddit, AITA?
TL;DR: I found out after my wife's death she'd been cheating on me for nearly a year. I exposed all the evidence at her funeral and am being labelled asshole of the year.
