AITAH for choosing the dog over my husband?

ElySioNs

ElySioNs

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UPDATE- THANK YOU ALL for your comments & upvotes. I’m pretty sure reading all of your comments opened hubbys heart to give our pup another chance to stay with our family. We had a family meeting last night and we came up with a vacuuming & yard cleaning schedule and will be getting a gate for the kitchen. We are going to give it a few weeks & have another to touch base & see how it is working out.

AITAH for choosing the dog over my husband? Eight years ago when our son was 5 or 6 and my husband and I were still dating I got our son a puppy. My husband, BF at the time expressed that he didn’t care for animals and wouldn’t ever be able to live with one. Our son, my other 2 children who are now grown and out of the house and I all grew attached to the dog.

He is a toy fox terrier. Besides a little “short man's syndrome” he is a really good dog. He is trained to use the bathroom outside ( has had a few accidents when we forget to let him out before bed). He does have some kind of medical condition the vet hasn’t been able to diagnose in which every few weeks he will have an “episode” where his body trembles and his back legs drag. It usually lasts for less than 5 min and he recovers quickly.

About 4 or 5 years ago I was having financial struggles and bf asked for us including the dog to move into with him. After my house was officially sold & we were in and settled. He started to complain about the dog shedding and crossing the threshold from the dining room into the kitchen. I started sweeping the house more frequently and showering the dog more. The complaints settled.

Covid happened. In November 2020 I asked him what he wanted for Christmas and he said he wanted to marry me and so less than a week later we got married in our garage with the Judge on Zoom. After getting married there was an occasional complaint about the dog going into the kitchen or his hair on the floor (he does shed a lot) but I would just be more vigilant about sweeping and paying attention if the dog followed me in the kitchen and I would tell him to get out which he always listens and does as he is told.

In Oct 2021 my mother fell ill. By Dec my mom was placed on hospice and my husband and our son together and my oldest son all caught covid so I was left to take my mom home and care for her on my own. Although I am a nurse and trained to care for the ill, caring for my mom in her final days really took a toll on me. Although I got the dog for our son I have always been the dog's “person” and he has been my little buddy. After the passing of my mom the dog was kind of a therapy dog of sorts. When I was curled up in bed with the covers over my head for days on end the dog would somehow get me up and moving. I say all that to say I am now attached to the dog.

Last year my husband and I went through a rough patch and I took the dog and moved out into my mom’s place. After counseling, dates, long talks, and much pressure to “come back” we moved back in, and about 2 months ago I rehabbed my moms place & rented it out. The dog actually moved back into the house with my husband a few weeks before me.

About 2 weeks after my moms place was rented my husband came to me and told me he could no longer live with the dog and the dog had to go and there were no compromises to be made. I talked with my older kids and some other family members and friends to see if they would be willing to take the dog but for one reason or another no one can take him. When I told our son who is now 13 that we will have to “get rid” of the dog he was really sad, and upset about it but reluctant to tell his dad how he feels as he knows it will make no difference. I have expressed how attached our son and myself are to the dog and that my conscience will not allow me to just discard the dog. I also explained that I am conflicted as I feel I have no options.

Last night he again expressed that he can no longer live with a dog. I expressed that I feel I have no options and would have to find a place to rent and take the dog and move out. He stated that I am choosing the dog over him, but if that's what has to happen for the dog to be out of the house then so be it. I don't want to leave but feel I have no other options as I refuse to just drop my dog at a shelter or somewhere. I also feel like I was kind of set up as he waited until he knew I had no other options to give me this ultimatum. So AITAH for choosing the dog over my husband?
 
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