anything wrong with me?HELP PLEASE

[ropemaxxerr]

Is there any way i can know if i have any mental disorder without going to the psychiatrist becouse i act diffrent from other people and i feel detached from their mindsets and i struggle to emotionally understand people i think emotions are there but when its time to show grief i feel something but i cant express it i just pretend to feel like others around me. im allways tidy and my clothes are neatly folded i started living apart from my family i have an older brother which i allaways fight with hes much bigger and 11 years older than me i think he is crazy he is under house arrest the only reason i moved from the house is that i dont get in a big fight with him and something bad happens and its a big stress on my parents becouse they are both struggling with their hearts and blood pressure im 16 and quite popular where i live and when i made love with girls i felt sexual excitement but i never felt anything deep its like when im kissing with her and she closses her eyes and i just look at her and dont know how does she actually feel that connection its really weird some people will say that im edgy etc but this is actually very real.