itisoverboyos
Angel Lucifer
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2022
- Posts
- 1,865
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Its OVER for me boyos
This vid the only one where I could at least attempt capture my eyes (my best trait. Talking about eye Not eye area). Even so you don’t actually see it. For whatever reason camera can’t fucking capture it so im not photogenic at all. You’d have to see in Person tbh no cope
I’ve never had a girlfriend and have only been rejected by girls (minus a -6 I fucked via tinder and my former oneitis who I went for a kiss successfully. Was VEEERY lucky to meet her on tinder, she was a slut and I knew she was interested cuz her first msg to me was, and i Quote, “you're fine af” ). I’ve seen thousands of sloots in the city and chit and know I wouldn’t have a chance with them.
There is absolutely no reason for that to suddenly change because why would something be different.
I went on accutane (acne treatment) and started weightlifting thinking it’d help me with confidence (can’t lift at the moment but I will start it again in the near future.) I have also been to several therapists but this has not helped.
I’ve known I’m attractive because as a 15(?) year old when I traveled to a foreign country once I got tons of looks and girls playing with their hair (only later in life did I read that this is something females sometimes do when they’re interested, however I realized then on my own already that it’s a sign they are interested) but for whatever reason I
don’t experience that anymore. One girl was sitting next to me in the movie theatre once and was legit staring at me for like 30 minutes I guess she didn’t know I knew or just didn’t care
But I am EXTREMELY socially awkward. I will always be noticeable at any social event or school for being the person who will not say a single word and has no friends. I know I actually have some rare undiscovered disease similar perhaps to autism. I can always force myself to do something like ask people questions in a conversation, etc. but I noticed actual small talk also Involves regularly chiming in to the conversation and magically having something to say which I can’t do. To help explain why this might be the case, I noticed that other people animate their faces when they talk. They talk with their eyes, etc. I, in comparison, am very “monotone” (not just speech but I mean everything like my ability/lack thereof to express emotions). I would never be able to talk with my hands or engage in sarcasm because it will come across as extremely forced (just like forced smiles would). Exactly like how im monotone i am also in conversation, as in I can only talk about “logical” stuff or rather things that have a reason to be Said and nothing else (and not talking for the sake of talking like everyone else does). Also, it’s important to note that it is not the situation that is awkward but me that is the awkardness. People would “cringe” literally for me (which is the worst feeling ever if them doing that makes me cringe in the first place and they can then tell) What needs to be stated here is that this is my inherent personality and not something that could ever be re learned with years of practicing.
I actually have a weakness that exposes me which people can, and soon enough (after talking to me for only a little bit) will, notice. they can see it extremely easily by looking in my eyes. It’s difficult to explain but basically it’s just a very embarrassing thing to happen.
There’s a difference between irrational social anxiety and logical embarrassment. This is way worse. Also, social anxiety appears before the interaction already but this only happens during (and after). And there is no point telling me the standard cliches “it’s all in your head” or “imagining the worst possible outcome” when it is simply enough to not be sure to already cause some embarrassment - a very rational thing!
This is also the reason I have very few (almost no) friends. The friends that I do have, don’t notice this about me. This is because I can tell (by looking them in the eyes…lol). Because they’re usually more oblivious people I guess and sometimes you can tell that not-noticing thing. Any attractive female would know though. I am actually very intelligent and can read people well.
One theory is that I am showing via my eyes to the people I’m awkward around the actual path and my logical procedure that gets to the outcome, which then makes sense and becomes plausible to them. So even if they don’t think about it on their own they’re still able to think the same thoughts that I am.
You guys just gotta trust me I’m true mentalcel, whole different category from you guys. Makes you seem like normies in comparison jfl
This vid the only one where I could at least attempt capture my eyes (my best trait. Talking about eye Not eye area). Even so you don’t actually see it. For whatever reason camera can’t fucking capture it so im not photogenic at all. You’d have to see in Person tbh no cope
I’ve never had a girlfriend and have only been rejected by girls (minus a -6 I fucked via tinder and my former oneitis who I went for a kiss successfully. Was VEEERY lucky to meet her on tinder, she was a slut and I knew she was interested cuz her first msg to me was, and i Quote, “you're fine af” ). I’ve seen thousands of sloots in the city and chit and know I wouldn’t have a chance with them.
There is absolutely no reason for that to suddenly change because why would something be different.
I went on accutane (acne treatment) and started weightlifting thinking it’d help me with confidence (can’t lift at the moment but I will start it again in the near future.) I have also been to several therapists but this has not helped.
I’ve known I’m attractive because as a 15(?) year old when I traveled to a foreign country once I got tons of looks and girls playing with their hair (only later in life did I read that this is something females sometimes do when they’re interested, however I realized then on my own already that it’s a sign they are interested) but for whatever reason I
don’t experience that anymore. One girl was sitting next to me in the movie theatre once and was legit staring at me for like 30 minutes I guess she didn’t know I knew or just didn’t care
But I am EXTREMELY socially awkward. I will always be noticeable at any social event or school for being the person who will not say a single word and has no friends. I know I actually have some rare undiscovered disease similar perhaps to autism. I can always force myself to do something like ask people questions in a conversation, etc. but I noticed actual small talk also Involves regularly chiming in to the conversation and magically having something to say which I can’t do. To help explain why this might be the case, I noticed that other people animate their faces when they talk. They talk with their eyes, etc. I, in comparison, am very “monotone” (not just speech but I mean everything like my ability/lack thereof to express emotions). I would never be able to talk with my hands or engage in sarcasm because it will come across as extremely forced (just like forced smiles would). Exactly like how im monotone i am also in conversation, as in I can only talk about “logical” stuff or rather things that have a reason to be Said and nothing else (and not talking for the sake of talking like everyone else does). Also, it’s important to note that it is not the situation that is awkward but me that is the awkardness. People would “cringe” literally for me (which is the worst feeling ever if them doing that makes me cringe in the first place and they can then tell) What needs to be stated here is that this is my inherent personality and not something that could ever be re learned with years of practicing.
I actually have a weakness that exposes me which people can, and soon enough (after talking to me for only a little bit) will, notice. they can see it extremely easily by looking in my eyes. It’s difficult to explain but basically it’s just a very embarrassing thing to happen.
There’s a difference between irrational social anxiety and logical embarrassment. This is way worse. Also, social anxiety appears before the interaction already but this only happens during (and after). And there is no point telling me the standard cliches “it’s all in your head” or “imagining the worst possible outcome” when it is simply enough to not be sure to already cause some embarrassment - a very rational thing!
This is also the reason I have very few (almost no) friends. The friends that I do have, don’t notice this about me. This is because I can tell (by looking them in the eyes…lol). Because they’re usually more oblivious people I guess and sometimes you can tell that not-noticing thing. Any attractive female would know though. I am actually very intelligent and can read people well.
One theory is that I am showing via my eyes to the people I’m awkward around the actual path and my logical procedure that gets to the outcome, which then makes sense and becomes plausible to them. So even if they don’t think about it on their own they’re still able to think the same thoughts that I am.
You guys just gotta trust me I’m true mentalcel, whole different category from you guys. Makes you seem like normies in comparison jfl
