Xangsane
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- Helene Packs for India: Helene eagerly packs for her long-awaited trip to India, excited for both the adventure and the chaos she expects to encounter with her friends.
- Flight to India: Helene endures a long, uneventful flight to New Delhi, filled with Indian food and entertainment, before landing smoothly and navigating a bustling airport.
- Helene Arrives in India: Upon arriving, Helene and her friends experience the sensory overload of New Delhi, battling chaotic traffic, street vendors, street shitting, eating off the floor and getting lost before finally reaching their hostel.
- Pajeet Rizzes Up Helene: Exhausted but curious, Helene explores New Delhi, where she is bombarded with attention and awkward attempts at flirting from local men, amusing both herself and her friends.
- Helene Gets Rizzed by the Pajeet Vendors: Helene faces a barrage of awkward advances from vendors in the chaotic marketplace, leading to ongoing jokes among her friends about the local "rizz" and meme-worthy moments.
Helene Packs for India
Helene stood in the middle of her bedroom, the sun filtering through the blinds as she surveyed the chaos of clothes, travel-sized toiletries, and electronics scattered around her open suitcase. She felt a growing sense of excitement bubble up as she tossed another sundress into the mix. India. After weeks of planning, the trip was finally happening. Her friends—Ravi, Brandon, Jason, Aiden, and even Xavier—had all agreed on the destination, and now they were days away from their flight.Helene (muttering to herself, grinning):
"Finally get to see the pajeets up close… this is going to be wild."
Living in Miami, Florida, her nearest major airport was Miami International Airport (MIA). She already knew that flying to India would require at least one connection, likely through New York or London, but she didn’t mind. The long-haul journey didn’t bother her. She was more focused on the adventure that awaited her.
Her family—mom Francine and dad Gordon—weren’t coming along on this trip. They’d stay home while she ventured across the world with her group of friends. It was her first time heading to Asia, and she felt a mix of anticipation and humor bubble up as she thought about the contrasts she’d face. Helene had done her fair share of research, and she had plenty of "pajeet" jokes stored up, ready for whatever came her way.
Helene (laughing to herself, folding a t-shirt):
"Ravi’s going to lose it when he sees the crowds. Hope he’s ready for the pajeet express."
Her suitcase was filling up fast. She threw in a couple more pairs of shoes, some lightweight tops, and a sturdy water bottle—she’d heard all the warnings about staying hydrated in the heat. The trip was going to be a sensory overload, and while part of her was eager to experience the culture, the food, and the landmarks, she couldn’t help but feel giddy about the sheer chaos of it all.
Helene (texting the group chat):
"Are you guys ready for this? It’s going to be full-on currycel, packed trains, and people shitting in fields—India, baby!"
Her phone buzzed almost immediately with responses from her friends, their excitement matching hers. Ravi, of course, was the most vocal, half-joking about the "ancestral homeland" he was finally going to experience.
Ravi (in the group chat):
"You know I’m ready! My whole life has been building to this moment."
Helene (laughing):
"Yeah, get ready for your med people, Ravi."
She packed her toiletries next—sunscreen, hand sanitizer, and some essential makeup items. It was going to be hot, she knew, but she wasn’t about to let that stop her from looking good. India was going to be something else, and she intended to make the most of it. But before any of that happened, she needed to finish packing, say goodbye to her parents, and prepare for the journey ahead.
Scene: The Flight to India
Helene settled into her seat aboard the massive Boeing 777-300ER, stretching her legs slightly in the cramped space. The cabin was filled with a mix of conversations in English, Hindi, and other languages she couldn’t quite place. The familiar hum of the engines took over as the plane taxied down the runway, and before long, they were airborne, beginning the 14-hour journey to New Delhi.The flight was smooth from start to finish, with no unexpected turbulence. The in-flight service kicked in a couple of hours after takeoff—typical airline food with a slight Indian twist. Helene picked at her butter chicken, rice, and naan, washing it down with the smallest bottle of water she’d ever seen.
Helene (whispering to Ravi across the aisle):
"I swear, these water bottles are for ants."
Ravi chuckled but quickly returned to his in-flight movie—Dangal, a Bollywood hit. Around her, passengers were either engrossed in their own screens, snoozing under airline blankets, or quietly chatting with family members. The cabin lights dimmed after a few hours, and the steady rhythm of the flight lulled Helene into a half-asleep, half-awake state, the hours blending together.
At some point, Helene scrolled through the in-flight entertainment, settling on an episode of a random nature documentary, narrated in the calm voice of someone who probably wished they were home instead of narrating antelope migrations. But it helped pass the time, and soon enough, the flight attendants were serving a second meal—some variation of eggs and potatoes that made Helene miss her mom’s cooking.
As the plane began its descent into New Delhi, the cabin came back to life. The passengers around her stirred, collecting their belongings and chatting excitedly about their arrival. Outside the window, Helene could see the hazy skyline of New Delhi, a patchwork of sprawling city streets beneath them.
Scene: Landing in India – Indira Gandhi International Airport
Touching down smoothly on the runway, Helene and her friends were immediately hit with a feeling of accomplishment. They had made it. India. No delays, no problems, and—most importantly—no lost luggage (yet).As they stepped off the plane and into the terminal, a wave of humidity greeted them, even inside the airport. The long, bright corridors of Indira Gandhi International Airport were a mix of modern design and subtle cultural references—elegant columns, murals depicting Indian heritage, and large crowds of travelers everywhere.
Helene walked through the terminal with her group, her carry-on trailing behind her, the faint smell of spices and jet fuel lingering in the air. The excitement she had felt earlier was replaced with a sudden hyperawareness of everything happening around her.
Scene: Border Control – A Surprisingly Smooth Experience
The line for border control wasn’t as bad as Helene had anticipated. The usual exhaustion from long flights was evident in the passengers around her, but the line moved at a steady pace. As Helene approached the booth, she handed over her passport and smiled awkwardly at the immigration officer.Officer (barely glancing up):
"Purpose of visit?"
Helene (smiling):
"Tourism."
The officer stamped her passport without another word, and just like that, Helene was officially in India. Her friends had similar experiences, breezing through the border check with minimal hassle.
Ravi (grinning as they regrouped):
"Well, that was easier than I thought. No interrogation, no long wait. Smooth sailing so far."
Scene: Baggage Claim – A Long, Silent Wait
The group made their way to baggage claim, where the fluorescent lights reflected off the sleek tiles of the airport floor. The conveyor belts hummed quietly as they awaited their bags. Helene stood with her arms crossed, eyes fixed on the carousel. There was something oddly hypnotic about watching the same black suitcases circle endlessly.She found herself mentally narrating the experience, almost like an overly analytical inner monologue. The bags moved in a rhythm—one suitcase thunked down the chute, then another, then a gap, then three at once. The sound of the conveyor belt seemed louder than it needed to be, the hum of it filling the awkward silence of tired travelers staring at black rectangles on wheels.
Helene (thinking to herself):
"Okay, that’s someone else’s... another one... why does that suitcase look like it’s been run over by a tractor...?"
Finally, her suitcase appeared, and she grabbed it with a sigh of relief, quickly stepping out of the way for the next person. Her friends did the same, pulling their bags off the conveyor belt with minimal effort.
Scene: Waiting for Public Transport – An Endless Sea of People
With their bags in tow, the group made their way to the public transport area outside the terminal. The sliding doors opened, and immediately, the chaotic energy of New Delhi hit them. Even before they stepped fully into the open air, they could hear the blaring of car horns, the murmur of hundreds of voices, and the screech of buses and tuk-tuks stopping and starting.Helene (autistically, to herself):
"So many people. Everyone moving in different directions, but somehow it works. Taxis lined up like ants, tuk-tuks scattered everywhere. How are they not crashing into each other?"
The scene was a full sensory overload. The air was thick and smelled of fuel, heat, and a mix of unfamiliar spices. The voices around her blurred together—English, Hindi, and regional languages all mixing into one incomprehensible hum.
Ravi (taking it all in, wide-eyed):
"This is it! This is the pajeet chaos I was talking about."
Helene smirked, knowing exactly what he meant. They stood by the bus stop, waiting for their ride into the heart of the city. Tuk-tuks buzzed past them, while drivers aggressively tried to haggle with travelers, offering rides at inflated prices.
Helene (thinking, eyes scanning the street):
"Taxis packed so tight, you can’t even see the pavement... buses with people practically hanging off the sides... why is there a cow in the middle of the road?"
As the group waited for their transport, the reality of India hit them fully. This was a far cry from the calm of Miami or even the organized chaos of JFK. This was going to be a different kind of adventure altogether—one filled with noise, heat, crowds, and the unpredictable nature of everyday life in New Delhi.
Scene: Entering the Transport – Chaos on the Streets of New Delhi
After what felt like an eternity of standing in the thick, noisy air outside the terminal, the group finally managed to secure a ride. It wasn’t exactly the most luxurious vehicle—a tuk-tuk with a driver who seemed far more interested in weaving through traffic than making conversation—but it would get them to their accommodation in New Delhi. The heat was immediate, and the faint smell of exhaust and street food hung in the air as they crammed into the small, rattling vehicle.Helene (smirking, squeezed between Ravi and Jason):
"Welcome to India, folks. I hope you like breathing in the entire city’s pollution in one breath."
As the tuk-tuk lurched forward, dodging between cars, buses, and the occasional motorbike that seemed to appear out of nowhere, Aiden leaned out, wide-eyed at the chaos unfolding around them. The streets were alive—children darting between vendors, stray dogs wandering through the crowds, and tuk-tuks buzzing past each other like angry insects.
Aiden (laughing nervously):
"Are we going to die in this thing? I feel like we’re in a video game with zero lives left."
Ravi (grinning):
"Nah, man. This is the full pajeet experience. We’ll be fine—just don’t look too closely at the road."
Scene: Lost in the Maze of New Delhi
After a bone-rattling ride through the city’s dense, chaotic streets, the group arrived at what they thought was their stop—a busy intersection surrounded by market stalls, street food vendors, and small, dilapidated buildings that looked like they were constantly under construction. The hotel—or, rather, the hostel they had booked—was supposed to be nearby.Helene (checking her phone, squinting at the map):
"This says we’re close, but I don’t trust Google Maps here. Everything looks the same."
The group began walking, their bags dragging behind them on the uneven pavement, dodging street vendors selling everything from knockoff sunglasses to steaming bowls of lentils and rice. Ravi was still buzzing with excitement, while Jason and Aiden were less enthusiastic, glancing around in confusion as they tried to navigate the unfamiliar streets.
Brandon (frowning at the map on his phone):
"We’ve definitely passed this street three times now. Are we walking in circles?"
Aiden (looking around, exasperated):
"I swear this place is like a maze. How are we supposed to find anything in this?"
They paused at a crosswalk—or what looked like a crosswalk—but the cars, motorbikes, and tuk-tuks didn’t seem to care. The traffic zoomed by, and there were no stoplights or pedestrian signals in sight.
Jason (raising his hands, frustrated):
"How are we supposed to cross? There’s literally no break in the traffic."
Helene stood back, amused as her friends hesitated, unsure of how to navigate the chaotic streets. She had already noticed that the locals didn’t wait for the traffic to stop; they just stepped out, weaving through the cars with an almost casual confidence.
Helene (grinning, shaking her head):
"You just go for it. Watch this."
With a laugh, Helene stepped out into the road, narrowly dodging a tuk-tuk and slipping between two cars with a quick shuffle. Her friends watched in stunned silence as she made it to the other side.
Helene (calling back, smirking):
"See? You’ve gotta channel your inner pajeet. They don’t wait for permission."
The rest of the group exchanged nervous glances before reluctantly following her lead, darting through traffic in an awkward, panicked rush. By the time they all reached the other side, they were sweating and slightly out of breath.
Ravi (laughing):
"That was terrifying. But also kind of fun."
Aiden (wiping his forehead):
"Fun for you maybe, but I felt like I was about to get run over ten times."
Scene: Helene's Unforgettable Street Encounter
As they continued wandering through the chaotic streets, still unsure if they were headed in the right direction, Helene suddenly stopped, her eyes widening with a mix of amusement and disbelief. There, on the sidewalk just a few feet away, was a woman squatting next to a wall, very clearly and unapologetically relieving herself in full view of everyone passing by.Helene (laughing and pointing):
"Guys, look! She’s actually shitting on the street!"
The group turned, and a mix of reactions followed—Jason looked horrified, Aiden blinked in shock, and Ravi burst into laughter.
Ravi (grinning):
"Oh man, Helene, you called it. Welcome to India! Full-on pajeet mode."
Helene couldn’t stop laughing, pointing out the woman’s nonchalance as she finished up, stood, and casually walked away as if nothing had happened. The rest of the group tried to keep walking, but Helene was still giggling, clearly enjoying the surreal nature of it all.
Aiden (shaking his head, grinning despite himself):
"Yeah, this place is something else."
Scene: Arriving at the Hostel
After what felt like hours of wandering, getting lost, crossing streets in near-death experiences, and encountering the bizarre sights of New Delhi, the group finally arrived at their destination—a small, slightly run-down hostel tucked away in a narrow alley, with a faded sign that barely hung on to the building.Brandon (relieved):
"Finally. I thought we’d never make it."
They checked in, their bags feeling heavier than ever, and climbed the narrow stairs to their rooms. The hostel wasn’t much, but it had what they needed—a place to sleep, a fan to keep them cool, and a chance to recharge before diving deeper into the chaos of India.
Helene threw her bag onto the bed and flopped down, staring at the ceiling with a grin still plastered on her face.
Helene (muttering to herself):
"Can’t wait to see what other madness this place has in store."
And with that, they settled in, the first chaotic day in India already full of stories to tell.
Scene: Crashing Out from Jet Lag
After the chaotic journey through the streets of New Delhi and the overwhelming sensory overload of their first day in India, Helene and her friends were exhausted. The heat, the noise, and the sheer madness of navigating a foreign city had worn them out more than they realized. They all collapsed into their hostel beds without much conversation, drifting off into deep, jet-lagged sleep almost immediately.Scene: Waking Up 13 Hours Later
Helene groaned softly as she opened her eyes, blinking at the sunlight streaming through the small window of their hostel room. She glanced at her phone and realized they had been out cold for a full 13 hours. It felt like only minutes had passed since they crashed, but her body still ached from the long flight and the chaos of yesterday.Helene (stretching, yawning):
"Guess we needed that."
She looked around the room. Ravi, Brandon, Jason, Aiden, and Xavier were all still half-asleep, slowly waking up. The room was stuffy, the fan overhead doing little to relieve the sticky heat that had crept in overnight.
Ravi (groggy, sitting up):
"Man, I feel like I got hit by a truck. How long were we out?"
Brandon (checking his phone):
"Thirteen hours. I think the jet lag finally caught up with us."
The group slowly started moving, gathering their things and preparing for the day ahead. They were eager to venture outside again, despite knowing the madness that awaited them on the streets.
Scene: Venturing Out – India in Full Force
Stepping outside, Helene and her friends were immediately greeted by the overwhelming sights, sounds, and smells of New Delhi in full swing. The streets were teeming with people—vendors calling out their wares, tuk-tuks zipping past with reckless abandon, and cows lazily wandering the roads, completely unconcerned with the traffic.The stereotypes Helene had half-joked about before the trip were now right in front of her eyes, playing out in real time. As they walked down the narrow streets, she spotted a man casually squatting near a wall, relieving himself in plain view of everyone, while others seemed entirely unfazed by it.
Helene (laughing, nudging Ravi):
"Look at that. Street shitting—check. It’s like a live version of everything we joked about."
Ravi grinned, shaking his head.
Ravi (mockingly):
"Ah, yes, the beauty of the homeland. You’ve got your authentic pajeet experience now."
Further down the road, they passed a vendor cooking what appeared to be some sort of street food over an open flame. A group of locals sat nearby, crouched on the dirty ground, eating off the road itself, not a plate in sight. Flies buzzed around the food, and Helene grimaced as one of the men scooped his meal with his hands, oblivious to the dirt and chaos around him.
Jason (disgusted):
"Is he seriously eating off the ground? And the flies? How do they even…?"
Aiden (laughing nervously):
"Man, I think my stomach just turned."
They continued down the street, stepping carefully to avoid piles of cow dung scattered across the pavement. At one point, they even saw a vendor selling small bottles of what looked like… cow urine. The group exchanged looks of disbelief, none of them wanting to ask for confirmation.
Brandon (raising an eyebrow):
"Is that… what I think it is?"
Helene (grinning, shaking her head):
"Yep. That’s definitely cow urine. Can’t wait to see who buys it."
The chaotic atmosphere only got more intense as they ventured deeper into the market area. Vendors were everywhere, selling everything from questionable-looking food to trinkets and clothing. Flies buzzed incessantly, hovering around the food stalls, and the stench of the city seemed to intensify with every step.
Scene: Indian Men Rizzing Up Helene
As they walked through the market, Helene began to notice something else—men, lots of them, staring at her. She had known it might happen. After all, she was tall, white, and definitely stood out among the locals. But the intensity of the stares was a bit much, even for her.One man in particular—a young Indian guy with slicked-back hair and a confident swagger—approached her, a grin on his face.
Indian Guy (in broken English, trying to be smooth):
"Hello, madam! You are very beautiful, yes? You need help finding something? I can show you around the market. Very good deals for you."
Helene fought the urge to roll her eyes as the guy gave her what was clearly his best attempt at rizz. He stood a bit too close, clearly hoping to impress her.
Helene (politely, but firmly):
"No thanks, I’m good."
But he wasn’t deterred, continuing to walk alongside her as if she hadn’t said anything at all.
Indian Guy (persistent):
"Ah, but madam, you will like this shop! Best fabrics, best prices. You are from America, yes? Very beautiful ladies from America."
Helene bit back a laugh, giving him a sidelong glance.
Helene (dryly):
"Yeah, no. I’m fine."
The guy lingered a moment longer, clearly hoping for a different reaction, but when Helene turned her attention back to her friends, he eventually drifted away, moving on to the next tourist who caught his eye.
Ravi (grinning, nudging Helene):
"That was some top-tier pajeet game right there. You must feel so special."
Helene rolled her eyes, laughing.
Helene (sarcastically):
"Yeah, just what I wanted—getting hit on by every guy who thinks I’ll be impressed by a discount on fabric."
As they continued through the market, more men tried their luck, approaching Helene with awkward compliments and offers to show her around. She brushed them off each time, finding the whole situation more amusing than anything else. While the attention was persistent, none of the men were remotely attractive to her. The charm—if there was any—was completely lost.
Helene (laughing to herself):
"Indian guys really need to work on their approach. This isn’t working for me."
The group moved on, fully immersed in the chaos and madness of New Delhi, already gathering stories and memories that would last them a lifetime.
Scene: Helene and the Group Continue Through the Market
The group continued their trek through the bustling streets of New Delhi, dodging more cow dung, tuk-tuks, and the unrelenting heat. Despite the chaos, Helene couldn’t help but find humor in the absurdity of it all. As they passed by another group of men who clearly couldn’t stop staring at her, she turned to her friends with a smirk, knowing exactly where the conversation was headed.Helene (grinning, nudging Aiden):
"So, this pajeet rizz is something else. I’ve been here for less than a day, and I’ve already been hit on by like five different guys who think I’m going to fall for a discount on fabric. They need to work on their game, seriously."
Ravi laughed, shaking his head, clearly enjoying the spectacle of it all.
Ravi (mockingly):
"Ah yes, the legendary pajeet rizz. 'You are very beautiful madam, please show bobs and vagene.' Classic."
The group burst out laughing at Ravi’s exaggerated imitation of the typical Indian internet meme that had been floating around for years—bobs and vagene, a now-infamous phrase from awkward attempts at flirting online.
Aiden (grinning):
"Come on, Helene, don’t tell me you’re not even a little flattered by the effort. I mean, 'please show bobs' is such a timeless romantic line."
Helene (sarcastic, rolling her eyes):
"Oh, yeah, totally flattered. There’s nothing like getting rizzed up by guys who think 'bobs and vagene' is a legitimate pickup line."
They walked on, the topic of pajeet rizz becoming a running joke as they encountered more curious stares and awkward attempts from men who clearly thought they were impressing Helene. One particularly bold guy called out from a small market stall, trying to catch her attention.
Bold Indian Guy (waving, grinning):
"Hello, madam! You have very nice figure. You need jewelry? I give you special price!"
Helene (under her breath, shaking her head):
"Here we go again."
Ravi couldn’t stop laughing at the whole situation, knowing how annoyed Helene was getting by the constant attention.
Ravi (grinning, teasing):
"Maybe if you just show bobs and vagene, he’ll give you a bigger discount, Helene."
The group erupted into laughter again as Helene shot Ravi a look, her smile betraying her annoyance.
Helene (sarcastic, laughing):
"Yeah, no thanks. I’ll pass. If I hear 'bobs' one more time, I might lose it."
They continued through the market, dodging more enthusiastic vendors and persistent suitors, while the topic of pajeet rizz and the infamous bobs and vagene meme became the joke of the day. It was all part of the surreal experience of New Delhi, a city that was living up to every wild expectation they’d had—and then some.
Scene: Reflecting on the Day
As they took a break near a small café, sipping on bottled water to fight off the oppressive heat, Helene leaned back in her chair, shaking her head at the ridiculousness of everything she had experienced so far.Helene (grinning, wiping sweat from her forehead):
"You know, I was expecting chaos. But I wasn’t expecting this level of insanity. If I get rizzed up one more time, I’m going to lose it."
Aiden (laughing):
"Come on, you’ve gotta give them credit. It takes a lot of guts to approach a white girl in India. They’re really going for it."
Helene smirked, amused by the absurdity of it all but definitely not impressed by the attention.
Helene (mocking):
"Yeah, I’m sure 'show bobs and vagene' is going to win me over one of these days."
They all laughed, knowing that despite the heat, the chaos, and the constant awkward flirting from the locals, India was already shaping up to be one of the wildest trips of their lives.
