PakAryan
Iron
- Joined
- Mar 24, 2025
- Posts
- 85
- Reputation
- 64
DNR alert
Every single day I'm blackpilled and not attractive (yet), I feel like a little part of myself and my soul kind of dies. Everything I believe in in is slowly growing more and more meaningless to me, every hope and thought is immediately ruined when I remember the overarching rule of looks irl. It's really hard to stay sane and normal when you remember that people (and especially women) are so inherently cruel just because of the way you were born and raised, something you didn't have much control over. I'm growing pretty nihilistic(?) in a lot of ways. I can't really care about what my future career is going to be anymore. The concept of marriage seems dull and dry. I can't even feel proud or care about my nation like I used to when I know I can't even get a girl right now.
I wouldn't say I'm totally depressed, most days I'm actually irrationally happy, but it doesn't change the fact that every day I can feel myself losing empathy, losing kindness, becoming colder, more narcissistic, arrogant etc,
It's not over, but life looks so much crueler when you realize the blackpill. The most painful thing is seeing people who had it easy their whole lives, making fun of you and others for just trying to look better and raise awareness about lookism in society. Technically, I guess it's a good thing when normies make fun of bp and looksmaxxing, makes it less popular --> less competition, but still
I'm currently low MTN after ascending from LTN, I'm fairly confident I'll manage to hit low HTN (or at least high MTN) with the way my current looksmaxxing trajectory is going, but it needs to happen fast, because living every day the way I'm living is not terrible, but kind of depressing. I just want to be attractive so I can get a girlfriend (or at least slay), have sex and lose my virginity, and restore my self-confidence, rid myself of my insecurities, and once again focus on greater things and enjoy life more
I just want to feel like myself again, just a better myself
Every single day I'm blackpilled and not attractive (yet), I feel like a little part of myself and my soul kind of dies. Everything I believe in in is slowly growing more and more meaningless to me, every hope and thought is immediately ruined when I remember the overarching rule of looks irl. It's really hard to stay sane and normal when you remember that people (and especially women) are so inherently cruel just because of the way you were born and raised, something you didn't have much control over. I'm growing pretty nihilistic(?) in a lot of ways. I can't really care about what my future career is going to be anymore. The concept of marriage seems dull and dry. I can't even feel proud or care about my nation like I used to when I know I can't even get a girl right now.
I wouldn't say I'm totally depressed, most days I'm actually irrationally happy, but it doesn't change the fact that every day I can feel myself losing empathy, losing kindness, becoming colder, more narcissistic, arrogant etc,
It's not over, but life looks so much crueler when you realize the blackpill. The most painful thing is seeing people who had it easy their whole lives, making fun of you and others for just trying to look better and raise awareness about lookism in society. Technically, I guess it's a good thing when normies make fun of bp and looksmaxxing, makes it less popular --> less competition, but still
I'm currently low MTN after ascending from LTN, I'm fairly confident I'll manage to hit low HTN (or at least high MTN) with the way my current looksmaxxing trajectory is going, but it needs to happen fast, because living every day the way I'm living is not terrible, but kind of depressing. I just want to be attractive so I can get a girlfriend (or at least slay), have sex and lose my virginity, and restore my self-confidence, rid myself of my insecurities, and once again focus on greater things and enjoy life more
I just want to feel like myself again, just a better myself
