Cants stop thinking about that foid and her Htn

deyus

deyus

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I genuinely can not stop thinking about her. It’s so pathetic, I fell in “love”with her 2 times. Once when we were in elementary school and then summer before my freshman year. Fucking hate summers, I was working construction because life decided that I was going to be a hard working ethnic. Before summer even started I came to develop feelings for her. She added me on snap literally 15 minutes after it turned 12am on her birthday. My autistic ass decided draw a gift 🎁 and said happy birthday. She responded with the typical “awww thanks.” Obviously me being autistic I thought I was in. Later that morning I decided to practice happy birthday on my viola for like an hour and then I sent it to her . Her response… AWWWW THANK YOU 😁😁… With a snap of her smile. And I just spiraled into happiness. Because simply that was the first time someone had ever smiled that hard at someone that I did. “Over” and from them I just started imagining my life with her. At work I couldnt stop thinking about her smile it genuinely gave me motivation to keep going especially because the work days were from 7am to 7pm except the drive to work was always 2 hours away so.. basically a 5-9. Keep in mind that I was working construction out in the hot fucking summer 90 degrees and above at 15** with probably like an average of 5 hour of sleep. (I blame this for my height) although it’s just me coping because my dad is 5’4 and my mom is 4’11. (It never began) Anyway I never fully made a move after that because I had high inhib like extremes levels. Although we did have this connection of us using the same filter every time we snapped each other and then i also started drawing daily animals to impress her.. it was literally just for her. She did save them but never drew anything in return. There was this one time when she also drew something… it was a fish” … me obviously having high inhibition I was scared to save it. A year after I found out that she literally sent it to everyone. Anyways after barely surviving summer (1st attempt). The first day of school she sends this snap of her in a pink shirt . And I thought it fit her so well it made me hella nervous … later that afternoon on my way to my last class I finally see her in person again and she just straight look ethereal… keep in mind she is a Mtb. In this time I was around hltn-lmtn.. the only advantage I had was that I was a cutecell.. we we’re around the same height 5’2.. (hate that I couldn’t see that it wasn’t going to work out) a week after a couple friends pressured me into asking her out… now obviously I was too scared to do so.. literally a day after a fucking 5’10 htn asked her out ( also a freshman btw): to be continued …1/4 of the story
Next important events
She dates him then breaks up..
8 months later dates my 6’2 htn friend
8 months later she breaks up with him and dates his best friend 6’0 hhtn



TLDAR: The Foid that I liked since 5th grade turned out to be hypergemous
 

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