chadimirputin
Iron
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2023
- Posts
- 16
- Reputation
- 20
Discovered the blackpill in late 2022 through Wheat Waffles on youtube when I was 16 years old, then I got into org and consumed blackpill content while at the peak of my depression, I was always made fun of in school for my lack of social skills and looks despite being 1,93m tall (which I think is like 6'3). After realizing that it was too late for most of the advices posted here I basically threw myself into a darker pit of depression for a ton of complex reasons that I won't get into. In 2023 K Shami popularized the blackpill and it made me even more embarrased that I was a part of such a community, being so conscious about my looks and my environment made me miserable. Back then it was a little niche thing, specially in my country, but now even my brother started making jokes about mewing (he's completly oblivious to bp and would make fun of it if he found out) and I just pretend I dont know what he's talking about, it makes me cringe so hard seeing this thing turn more and more mainstream over the years which is why I never posted anything here, but also because I'm afraid of judgement and people IRL finding out. Like I mentioned before I already have a lot of knowledge and I know how to change my looks and my life, but I was so depressed that I couldnt get out of bed.
Fast forward to now, I jestermaxxed my way through highschool, I was never taken seriously and was merely a puppet for others entertainment but atleast I wasn't made fun of.
I'm slowly getting out of my depressive state and im very proud of myself for the short but meaningful steps I've taken, I plan to travel the world alone and do something for humanity, for 3 years all I could think about was my looks and I do agree they play a major role in life, but I would not feel fullfilled even if I looked like Matt Bomer.
I am still a virgin and never had a girlfriend and I don't plan on chasing to get one, I grew to accept how my life is destined to be and if it's meant to happen I will just let it flock to me. There's a lot of things that I left out in this post, but I still hope that someone out there finds this inspiring or atleast relatable, lurking on org also made me feel incredibly privelleged for having people that still love me and not having a disability or something that prevents me from living a normal life, I also learned that most people here are way too young to be suffering like I did, the thing you should value the most is your time on this planet so if you can't perfect your life atleast stop being selfish and help someone else, specially if you're young.
I'm chasing something that will make me happy and I still don't know what it is, but I think im going to be just fine.
(Sorry for any bad grammar, english isnt my main language and sorry for the clusterfuck of a thread, I wrote this quickly and from the bottom of my soul so please dont make fun of me, might be my last post ever)
Fast forward to now, I jestermaxxed my way through highschool, I was never taken seriously and was merely a puppet for others entertainment but atleast I wasn't made fun of.
I'm slowly getting out of my depressive state and im very proud of myself for the short but meaningful steps I've taken, I plan to travel the world alone and do something for humanity, for 3 years all I could think about was my looks and I do agree they play a major role in life, but I would not feel fullfilled even if I looked like Matt Bomer.
I am still a virgin and never had a girlfriend and I don't plan on chasing to get one, I grew to accept how my life is destined to be and if it's meant to happen I will just let it flock to me. There's a lot of things that I left out in this post, but I still hope that someone out there finds this inspiring or atleast relatable, lurking on org also made me feel incredibly privelleged for having people that still love me and not having a disability or something that prevents me from living a normal life, I also learned that most people here are way too young to be suffering like I did, the thing you should value the most is your time on this planet so if you can't perfect your life atleast stop being selfish and help someone else, specially if you're young.
I'm chasing something that will make me happy and I still don't know what it is, but I think im going to be just fine.
(Sorry for any bad grammar, english isnt my main language and sorry for the clusterfuck of a thread, I wrote this quickly and from the bottom of my soul so please dont make fun of me, might be my last post ever)
