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Vermilioncore
the Lord regretted that He had made man
- Joined
- Oct 17, 2019
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I (32 F) cheated on my husband (33 M) of 8 years in the back of a car parked less than a block away from my house last night I don't know what came over me but I was out drinking with my girlfriends and I got a little too tipsy and accepted a ride home from a guy I met at the bar. He had been flirting with me all night and I guess I had reciprocated a little more than I realized, so he offered me a ride home. I accepted. He drove me home but I had him stop about a block away from my house because I didn't want him to know where I lived. After he parked he leaned over to kiss me. Within 2 minutes I was in his backseat with my pants off...2 to 3 minutes tops...no condom, no pull out, and I am not on the pill. But I am apparently a dumb whore. Jesus Christ! So, I get out of his car, stumble toward my house, and when I walk in my husband is standing by the bathroom door. I thought I was busted but our 4-year-old had gotten up in the middle of the night and needed to use the bathroom. She isn't totally potty trained yet so she wakes us up to assist when this happens. My husband simply said, "Hi baby, how was your night?" I don't remember what I said back but I remember him whispering as I walked by, "Since you got to have a good time tonight can I have one too really quick before you go to sleep?" I should have said no, but instead I let him have sex with me right after I had sex with this stranger. Good God. What is wrong with me? Is it possible that my husband saw what was going on? I mean you can literally see down the street where we were parked if you are standing where he was standing when I walked in the house. He couldn't have seen what was going on inside the car but he could have seen that I got out of a car, one that he did not recognize for that matter. I have never done anything like this before. I am flirtatious but I have never crossed any physical lines since getting married. I feel awful. I don't know what to do. Should I confess? Should I deny no matter what? How likely is it that my husband saw what was going on and is just testing me or biding his time? what can I do to find out if he knows anything? What can I ask him? It is driving me crazy and I'm a nervous wreck. Can I say that I was too drunk to consent? I don't mean I would press charges on the guy or anything like that. I don't even know who he was. And I was definitely drunk but I knew what I was doing when I consented. Would I have done it sober? Absolutely not. But it was as much my decision as it was his. But still, could I possibly use that as an excuse? I'm sure I will get a lot of hate for this but hopefully I will also get some advice too.