MrCucumber
The Road to Hell is Paved with Good Intentions
- Joined
- Jul 12, 2019
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Posted by
u/PandaProject69
5 hours ago
I (23) want my parent to move in with me but my girlfriend (23) does not
Relationships
I know this is very out of the norm for many people and many may not understand my side. Background info about me, I am Asian and growing up I was always raised with many of my family members around. When someone buys a house it’s always close by. When I went to college I moved out but I still came back every weekend to visit my parents (still do now that I’m out of college and working full time). I always knew at some point in my life I wanted to buy a house and move my parents in with me. My girlfriend knew about this too and she said she was okay with it (but later in life). We have been together for 7 years. Also my girlfriend and my family has a great relationship. They love her.
My lease is ending about three months and I have been thinking about buying a house. I’m tired of living in a small apartment and my girlfriend is too. I found out of a home loan program that would allow me to do able to a no down payment and and no PMI but I found out today actually that the interest rate would be a good amount higher (that’s a no go for me). My parents offered to help me with the down payment but they would need to move in with me. This is early even for me but I would be okay with this seeing the situation I am in plus the houses we were looking to buy were huge so we would have some privacy (two living rooms, 4000 sq ft, etc.). I have told my girlfriend about that and she disagrees and does not want my parents to help and move in with us and I understand. I told her with the amount I am saving every week we won’t have a 20% down payment until 8 years later and I am saving a decent amount of money too. I do not want to marry her so late and have kids so late. Just a small peek into our financial situation, I work full time with a decent paying job. My girlfriend currently has no jobs and failed her nursing classes two times and is on her third attempt. She is only able to help out with 1/4 of our rent but she is still trying in school (expected to grad. In two years) so I am perfectly fine with this. When I told her it would take so long for me to save up, she blamed it on me buying my car when I graduated and got my job. This ticked me off because I work hard everyday to pay for it and pay for the place we live in. What drives me crazy is she sees the fault in me before evaluating herself but I kept quiet I didn’t want to mention her problems in school and work situation because I know it’s a sensitive subject. Please don’t get the wrong idea, I love and care for her a lot, I want to be able to marry her and have kids but with only one income it is difficult. Am I wrong for wanting to take my parents offer? What should I do? I am typing this late at night so please pardon any typos.
TLDR: I want my parents to move in with me but my girlfriend disagrees. It would take for a very long time to have have the proper down payment and I don’t want to be 31 until I marry her and have children.
Wouldn't be a day of posting on here if I didn't put a thread in the wrong subforum at least once
u/PandaProject69
5 hours ago
I (23) want my parent to move in with me but my girlfriend (23) does not
Relationships
I know this is very out of the norm for many people and many may not understand my side. Background info about me, I am Asian and growing up I was always raised with many of my family members around. When someone buys a house it’s always close by. When I went to college I moved out but I still came back every weekend to visit my parents (still do now that I’m out of college and working full time). I always knew at some point in my life I wanted to buy a house and move my parents in with me. My girlfriend knew about this too and she said she was okay with it (but later in life). We have been together for 7 years. Also my girlfriend and my family has a great relationship. They love her.
My lease is ending about three months and I have been thinking about buying a house. I’m tired of living in a small apartment and my girlfriend is too. I found out of a home loan program that would allow me to do able to a no down payment and and no PMI but I found out today actually that the interest rate would be a good amount higher (that’s a no go for me). My parents offered to help me with the down payment but they would need to move in with me. This is early even for me but I would be okay with this seeing the situation I am in plus the houses we were looking to buy were huge so we would have some privacy (two living rooms, 4000 sq ft, etc.). I have told my girlfriend about that and she disagrees and does not want my parents to help and move in with us and I understand. I told her with the amount I am saving every week we won’t have a 20% down payment until 8 years later and I am saving a decent amount of money too. I do not want to marry her so late and have kids so late. Just a small peek into our financial situation, I work full time with a decent paying job. My girlfriend currently has no jobs and failed her nursing classes two times and is on her third attempt. She is only able to help out with 1/4 of our rent but she is still trying in school (expected to grad. In two years) so I am perfectly fine with this. When I told her it would take so long for me to save up, she blamed it on me buying my car when I graduated and got my job. This ticked me off because I work hard everyday to pay for it and pay for the place we live in. What drives me crazy is she sees the fault in me before evaluating herself but I kept quiet I didn’t want to mention her problems in school and work situation because I know it’s a sensitive subject. Please don’t get the wrong idea, I love and care for her a lot, I want to be able to marry her and have kids but with only one income it is difficult. Am I wrong for wanting to take my parents offer? What should I do? I am typing this late at night so please pardon any typos.
TLDR: I want my parents to move in with me but my girlfriend disagrees. It would take for a very long time to have have the proper down payment and I don’t want to be 31 until I marry her and have children.
Wouldn't be a day of posting on here if I didn't put a thread in the wrong subforum at least once
