
Vantablack
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- Joined
- Jun 15, 2025
- Posts
- 932
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We aren't official yet, but we text a lot. She constantly talks about meeting friends, going out to parties, always having plans to just go out and chill. She has friends basically all over the country and recently moved and instantly made friends there as well.
I rot in my room browsing incel forums on a Sunday. Dreading going to work tomorrow, knowing that I cant meet her until next week and she is the only real human face-to-face connection I have. I moved to a new city, have 0 friends here. I hate everyone at work and i just mask till i can go back home.
every time she brings up her fucking "plans" i get this instant feeling of dread. She does not know I am friendless, i mask saying i am going to parties all the time, but im actually just rotting in my room. its a heavy pain, a buden so brutal i wanna get violent every single time. Sometimes i think of stopping talking to her to avoid the pain, but then i will actually be completely alone. I do not know if that is better or worse. She is a constant reminded of my subhumanity and neurodivergence.
Is being truly alone better?
I rot in my room browsing incel forums on a Sunday. Dreading going to work tomorrow, knowing that I cant meet her until next week and she is the only real human face-to-face connection I have. I moved to a new city, have 0 friends here. I hate everyone at work and i just mask till i can go back home.
every time she brings up her fucking "plans" i get this instant feeling of dread. She does not know I am friendless, i mask saying i am going to parties all the time, but im actually just rotting in my room. its a heavy pain, a buden so brutal i wanna get violent every single time. Sometimes i think of stopping talking to her to avoid the pain, but then i will actually be completely alone. I do not know if that is better or worse. She is a constant reminded of my subhumanity and neurodivergence.
Is being truly alone better?