ToTheTop
Gold
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2021
- Posts
- 955
- Reputation
- 1,051
Gonna be a long, and somewhat autistic post but wanted to share my thoughts and summaries from the past year since I have looksmaxxed leading to dating and hookup experiences. Curious to see who of you agree, disagree, or have anything to add. Mostly looking to create a discussion and see your thoughts on this stuff as I'm still moulding my ideas on this subject. I'll leave a TLDR at the bottom.
For context, I've been rated as a maxxed HTN on this forum since making all the changes (which I think is very reflective of my experiences when combined with a good lifestyle/income) and that's me in the display picture for reference.
My summaries as a 27, nearly 28 year old man not looking to waste time hooking up anymore:
- I only date/hookup with girls <25. Every girl above 25 has come emotionally damaged or ran through (thanks tinder), (even if she was super classy and not primitive). Otherwise she is dating for security/stability via marriage and wants kids soon, something that is not on my timeline for another 5-10 years.
All the chicks I've dated who are between 19-23 have mostly dated me for pure attraction without rationality and seeing me for ulterior motives (a provider). They just want to be around me, share music, talk about our day and spend time together. It's raw attraction and way more real. It doesn't matter if I take her to an expensive restaurant or we chill at mine. It's been the most fun and I believe I could have turned most of them into serious relationships had I wanted to. It's extremely hard to get this with girls >25 as their expectations are of the guys they dated (and couldn't secure) when they were <25. Therefore If they were a stacylite in their prime years and could nearly but not quite secure Chad, then she will be a HTB in her late 20s (due to aging) and will never be happy with her dating options as the only men who will take her seriously now are her equivalent looksmatch (HTN) at best. She will either put up with him and not be fully satisfied or she will decide not to settle and stay single (either way I wouldn't want to be the HTN in this scenario).
A good quote I remember a 26 year old female friend from uni say to me last year was 'I don't date the guys that excite me anymore as I know they're not serious and wont be good longterm.' She is a HQNP HTB who has had plenty of ONS on tinder and is now completely unsatisfied with the dating market as she approaches 28 (she has of course remained single over the past 5 years as the guys she wants wont stay and the guys who will stay wont live up to her chad standards from when she was 21).
The reality is if you decide to date a chick >25 then you must accept and understand she will have a past from when she was more beautiful and younger. Most men are naïve to this and don't understand they were not her first choice, rather the safe choice and the 'best she could get' as she became less physically attractive and began the aging process.
The healthiest way to have a relationship IMO is to be a guy around 27-29 and date a girl 5-7 years younger. This way you will 'descend' together in terms of real sexual market value (assuming you both lead similar lifestyles). You will also likely be on the same mental level in terms of when you want kids/marriage down the line (assuming you want this). The issue with being in your mid 30s as a man is the age gap will often be too big to date a girl in her early 20s and you are likely on a different mental timeline to the girl. Therefore you end up getting into a serious relationship and dating the girl in her late 20s who might be the hottest girl you ever date, but you wont be the chad she once had.
The average age for marriage for men is around 31 in the UK, with woman at 29. The main issue with this is the man is getting the raw end of the deal as the woman is using this man as a safety net while the man is often excited as he is getting a chance with the chick who would have rejected him when she was younger. The only way to eliminate this problem is to looksmax, moneymax and become a man worth something before he is 30, then you can find a serious longterm girlfriend in her PEAK meaning she is picking you as she is genuinely in love with you, rather than picking you as a safety net.
Ultimately, it depends what you are looking for in a serious relationship. I believe in the traditional sense of taking care of my girl (paying for dinner, even rent and being the decisive leader in the relationship). However, I don't believe in doing these things to bridge the lack of gap in physical attraction. This is where famous Redpiller Rollo Tomassi gets it wrong (in my opinion) as they lead with status and wealth to claw in woman as long as 'the guy isn't too ugly'. He suggests men peak in RMV late 30s (which is true if you want to be a provider, but not in SMV). If you stay in the game too long like these redpiller guys suggest, then your woman wont be with you because she actually wants to fuck you but as you're the 'smart' choice; don't be that sucker.
My strategy - I'm going to look for a maxxed HTB 19-23 who I have a good mental connection with and look to build something with. I'll mostly use hinge or tinder as my experience with more formal apps like 'inner circle' and 'luxy' is they cater too much for woman looking for the provider rather than going for the connection first and money secondary. I'll continue to looksmax, build my net worth and enjoy life from here onwards regardless of my dating situation (never get lazy).
-----------
TLDR - Be looksmaxxed, have a good income/lifestyle before 30, get a serious girlfriend in her early 20s and both be on the same SMV timeline together as you enjoy life (lifestyle dependent). Also be on the same timeline for the future (with regards to kids, marriage etc). Plus you will be her first choice, not her 'oh fuck i'm losing my looks' choice post chad era. Let the girl have a 'pick me' mentality where she just wants to be with you and spend time with you, only then decide if you want to be serious.
For context, I've been rated as a maxxed HTN on this forum since making all the changes (which I think is very reflective of my experiences when combined with a good lifestyle/income) and that's me in the display picture for reference.
My summaries as a 27, nearly 28 year old man not looking to waste time hooking up anymore:
- I only date/hookup with girls <25. Every girl above 25 has come emotionally damaged or ran through (thanks tinder), (even if she was super classy and not primitive). Otherwise she is dating for security/stability via marriage and wants kids soon, something that is not on my timeline for another 5-10 years.
All the chicks I've dated who are between 19-23 have mostly dated me for pure attraction without rationality and seeing me for ulterior motives (a provider). They just want to be around me, share music, talk about our day and spend time together. It's raw attraction and way more real. It doesn't matter if I take her to an expensive restaurant or we chill at mine. It's been the most fun and I believe I could have turned most of them into serious relationships had I wanted to. It's extremely hard to get this with girls >25 as their expectations are of the guys they dated (and couldn't secure) when they were <25. Therefore If they were a stacylite in their prime years and could nearly but not quite secure Chad, then she will be a HTB in her late 20s (due to aging) and will never be happy with her dating options as the only men who will take her seriously now are her equivalent looksmatch (HTN) at best. She will either put up with him and not be fully satisfied or she will decide not to settle and stay single (either way I wouldn't want to be the HTN in this scenario).
A good quote I remember a 26 year old female friend from uni say to me last year was 'I don't date the guys that excite me anymore as I know they're not serious and wont be good longterm.' She is a HQNP HTB who has had plenty of ONS on tinder and is now completely unsatisfied with the dating market as she approaches 28 (she has of course remained single over the past 5 years as the guys she wants wont stay and the guys who will stay wont live up to her chad standards from when she was 21).
The reality is if you decide to date a chick >25 then you must accept and understand she will have a past from when she was more beautiful and younger. Most men are naïve to this and don't understand they were not her first choice, rather the safe choice and the 'best she could get' as she became less physically attractive and began the aging process.
The healthiest way to have a relationship IMO is to be a guy around 27-29 and date a girl 5-7 years younger. This way you will 'descend' together in terms of real sexual market value (assuming you both lead similar lifestyles). You will also likely be on the same mental level in terms of when you want kids/marriage down the line (assuming you want this). The issue with being in your mid 30s as a man is the age gap will often be too big to date a girl in her early 20s and you are likely on a different mental timeline to the girl. Therefore you end up getting into a serious relationship and dating the girl in her late 20s who might be the hottest girl you ever date, but you wont be the chad she once had.
The average age for marriage for men is around 31 in the UK, with woman at 29. The main issue with this is the man is getting the raw end of the deal as the woman is using this man as a safety net while the man is often excited as he is getting a chance with the chick who would have rejected him when she was younger. The only way to eliminate this problem is to looksmax, moneymax and become a man worth something before he is 30, then you can find a serious longterm girlfriend in her PEAK meaning she is picking you as she is genuinely in love with you, rather than picking you as a safety net.
Ultimately, it depends what you are looking for in a serious relationship. I believe in the traditional sense of taking care of my girl (paying for dinner, even rent and being the decisive leader in the relationship). However, I don't believe in doing these things to bridge the lack of gap in physical attraction. This is where famous Redpiller Rollo Tomassi gets it wrong (in my opinion) as they lead with status and wealth to claw in woman as long as 'the guy isn't too ugly'. He suggests men peak in RMV late 30s (which is true if you want to be a provider, but not in SMV). If you stay in the game too long like these redpiller guys suggest, then your woman wont be with you because she actually wants to fuck you but as you're the 'smart' choice; don't be that sucker.
My strategy - I'm going to look for a maxxed HTB 19-23 who I have a good mental connection with and look to build something with. I'll mostly use hinge or tinder as my experience with more formal apps like 'inner circle' and 'luxy' is they cater too much for woman looking for the provider rather than going for the connection first and money secondary. I'll continue to looksmax, build my net worth and enjoy life from here onwards regardless of my dating situation (never get lazy).
-----------
TLDR - Be looksmaxxed, have a good income/lifestyle before 30, get a serious girlfriend in her early 20s and both be on the same SMV timeline together as you enjoy life (lifestyle dependent). Also be on the same timeline for the future (with regards to kids, marriage etc). Plus you will be her first choice, not her 'oh fuck i'm losing my looks' choice post chad era. Let the girl have a 'pick me' mentality where she just wants to be with you and spend time with you, only then decide if you want to be serious.
Last edited:
