True truecel
Solstice
- Joined
- Oct 31, 2024
- Posts
- 2,484
- Reputation
- 3,527
Day 20 of self improvement
Still not able to manage my own schedule bc of bullshit vacation but whatever
Met some people today
One old lady, relative, is bedridden and was in a wheelchair when I saw her.. feet were swollen AF, looked horrific. She was nice but damn her body is completely utterly fucked. Her hands are barely hanging on and her fingers were genuinely twisting in all sorts of contorted ways idk why the skin on the fingers was sooooo fucked. It made me sad
Aging is a brutal pill. I will make sure I never end up in this circumstance and try to get the ppl close to me to stay active and not end up like this. Allegedly the old lady used to be pretty high PSL back in the day but I doubt it, old heads have shit standards . Aging is horrific though
Anyways,
I finally met all my goals for the day. Gonna ramp things up when I’m back home. Also I’m noticing that focusing too much on planning and just goals when doing activities just ruins my precensce and my mental state. Sometimes , often a lot of the time it’s good to live in the present.
MY DIET NEEDS TO GET BETTER. Lean meat, eggs, fiber, good fruits. I’m realizing that some fruits are actually just FUCKING useless they’re just overly glazed for no reason, I mean useless from a nutritional perspective.
Mental Health check: I feel okay, but I feel the slow creep of lustful desires approaching. I need to hold those thoughts at the line and not entertain them. Also I’m noticing that I’m talking to myself frequently subconsciously. Im pissed about that because that’s lowkey autistic behavior, but I guess the first step to fixing it is catching myself in the act.
3 things I’m grateful for:
Having a dog
Having a dad in my life who cares about me
That I can sleep for a long time tonight
1 thing to do tomorrow above all else: Learn how to deal with procrastination
Still not able to manage my own schedule bc of bullshit vacation but whatever
Met some people today
One old lady, relative, is bedridden and was in a wheelchair when I saw her.. feet were swollen AF, looked horrific. She was nice but damn her body is completely utterly fucked. Her hands are barely hanging on and her fingers were genuinely twisting in all sorts of contorted ways idk why the skin on the fingers was sooooo fucked. It made me sad
Aging is a brutal pill. I will make sure I never end up in this circumstance and try to get the ppl close to me to stay active and not end up like this. Allegedly the old lady used to be pretty high PSL back in the day but I doubt it, old heads have shit standards . Aging is horrific though
Anyways,
I finally met all my goals for the day. Gonna ramp things up when I’m back home. Also I’m noticing that focusing too much on planning and just goals when doing activities just ruins my precensce and my mental state. Sometimes , often a lot of the time it’s good to live in the present.
MY DIET NEEDS TO GET BETTER. Lean meat, eggs, fiber, good fruits. I’m realizing that some fruits are actually just FUCKING useless they’re just overly glazed for no reason, I mean useless from a nutritional perspective.
Mental Health check: I feel okay, but I feel the slow creep of lustful desires approaching. I need to hold those thoughts at the line and not entertain them. Also I’m noticing that I’m talking to myself frequently subconsciously. Im pissed about that because that’s lowkey autistic behavior, but I guess the first step to fixing it is catching myself in the act.
3 things I’m grateful for:
Having a dog
Having a dad in my life who cares about me
That I can sleep for a long time tonight
1 thing to do tomorrow above all else: Learn how to deal with procrastination
