Fatherhood Guide: How to be a father and raise an ideal son

[Algernon]

Intro
​

(skip to part 1 this is kind of basic advice)

I'm only going to talk about having a son, maybe I'll do a thread for having a daughter but I'm sure much less of you would be interested in that, even if its equally likely to happen.

However, you may as well try to maximize your chances of having a son even if it may fail.

Firstly, to maximize the probability of having a son, research the Whelan and Shettles method. The Whelan method seems to have more evidence which suggests 4-6 days before ovulation leads to the highest probability of having a son since male sperm swim faster, so try to time ovulation over 3 months so you can attempt to have the greatest chance.

Secondly, It's also suggested diet can play a role aswell (bananas, potatoes, meat) 6 weeks before conception and that deep penetration leads to greater chances.

While these aren't well-evidenced, you may as well try them to see if you can increase the odds.

Part 1 – Goals of Fatherhood​

It tends to be that online when you read advice, it usually is based on your wife, or letting your kid explore and find themselves. An especially common sentiment is the "Don't tell your kid what to think, but how to think."

But I am sure many of us would be disappointed by several outcomes of our children, for example what if they have an inherently bad nature and you want to steer them away? While it is impossible to control everything, you can attempt your best to control specific life events in your sons life, while letting the inbetween stages be free.

For me, attempting to come up with an ideal son would be: Decently athletic, smart enough to get through life and succeed, looks good enough to not get gatekept from parts of life, similar philosophical views as myself (or atleast for a time and is able to think beyond me), able to control his life and see risk, knowing to avoid it, and starting the cycle again by having his own kids.

Part 2 – The Early Years​

This covers what you should do from the birth of your son, up until he reaches 18.

Part 2.1: Setting up the environment, and going from birth to the first year.

this early part is basic advice, skip to me saying "thirdly" if you have low attention or think this is obvious

Firstly, atleast in the early years, the most important thing as a father is paranoia. You must be paranoid of every way since infants can die in plenty of ways such as SIDS, where it can be entirely unexpected, know where your children are at all times in the first years and atleast be able to visualize it and create a worst-possible scenario in your head and atleast attempt to reduce its possibility.

Secondly, your wife. You do somewhat have to get her to agree, or atleast be able to convince her that you can take care most of the stuff relating to you and her son. Probably the hardest part.

Thirdly, environmental factors play a huge role. I recommend searching your country (or maybe an ideal place you would go if you have enough money) for statistics on places, for example lowest crime rate, and then move to maybe the 5th lowest crime rate rural or suburban place (suburbs are good but typically you are surrounded by a lot of people, + you can't really control your house too well)

I'd recommend trying to hit atleast 4 of the following qualities: Rural (best since less taxes, farm food nearby)/suburban, low crime, dominant political party of your choosing, still somewhat surrounded by people (this way if you are affected by a crime or your house is broken into you atleast have close places to get to, or incase of injury you can get to a doctor), good economic opportunity (important), good social opportunity, good weather.

Next, change most of your house out, search up materials in beds, pillows, etc, change them out to the best of your economic ability to not have plastics (giving your son better hormones during puberty, allowing for greater height and muscle growth among other things) and always avoid phthalates and plastics that reduce testosterone (plastic bags, shower curtains, food packages, receipts, in dust in the air and water aswell). In general, check any medicine prescribed by doctors, check any material of anything around you, etc, be paranoid.

This part is kind of basic but buy a safe crib (preferably a non-plastic bassinet for the first 6 months to reduce chances of SIDS) for your son to sleep in close to the ground, make sure the entire room is secure and try to sleep in around the same room.

Make sure he is breastfed by your wife (better for jawline, iq, one of the most important things diet-wise in youth).

Now that your environment is good, you have a house in a better area with your wife and agendas set. This should work for about the first year, but now to make your son walk, and talk?

*also i didn't mention doctors and vaccination since I don't know too much about it, but a large majority of advice based on an individual can be applied to your own child so take advice and research it yourself.

Part 2.2: Toddler and Teenage Years

These years are very important and pivotal in shaping a childs personality, the first years affect them physically, but these years affect their intelligence, beliefs, and emotions.

I saw this on one of those basic threads however it is actually good advice, read and speak outloud all the time to your son, having him learn language as early as possible is very important since it contributes to his intelligence, and leads to earlier understanding of philosophy, math, science, religion, and many more fields.

For walking, it is honestly pretty basic, focus on safety, let him practice crawling and standing, then try and get him to walk.

This paragraph will drastically reduce chances of being LGBT, if you end up having multiple kids and one is your son and the other your daughter, don't let their clothes or habits mix and dont let your son engage in your daughters activities. Also, as a father you should be closer to your son then your wife.

Now, make sure your son is outside a lot (but always watch him when outside and be close) through out all points of his life, blindness and glasses can be caused by not being outside enough (not looking in the sun but more like seeing sunlight)

I won't say avoid technology entirely but I'd say slowly ease into it around 15-ish, a lot of bad habits by many of this forum I'm sure can be accounted by having internet access too early. Also, don't be afraid to show your son darker parts of life that exist, to be aware and paranoid is what makes you live longer, and passing on that paranoia to your son is important. For example if you want to somewhat program your kids, find good movies and pick them apart and you can program some of their early life behaviors off that (don't let them do it too much though of course). These movies can be modeled after your values such as religious principles or tradition. Also, you can also use older outdated tech at anytime aswell.

Assuming you are smart enough, then homeschool your son (to not get your son influenced by other people like teachers, principals etc ideologies) and try to raise him in more boy areas (a boxing club, soccer practice etc, still remember to be paranoid since even in these areas you must be aware there are bad people even including some of the kids your son is surrounded by) to get him to be more social and strong.

Try and get your son on good diets (eating meat from a local farm for example, you can easily find good diets on here that apply to yourself, you can apply it to your kid) and be aware of looks, teach him a little about philosophy and religion but you can used controlled opposition to attempt to reinforce beliefs by showing weaker opposition to stronger beliefs for your ideology etc.

After the toddler years it leads to teenage years which have a lot in common, the main thing is just be aware of what you teach your kids, physically and mentally, know how to maintain control and aswell teaching control over your life (one of the most important things to me is to control your life, even if something is beneficial, if it risks making your life lose control then it is not worth it, teach your kid to know when to take risks, control, thoughtfulness of the future).

After a couple years of homeschooling and if you believe you have enough control, I think it could work to bring your son into public school.

I think after easing your son into technology and learning how to use it responsibly for the 16th-18th year of his life, it fits well into him becoming an adult, I still think atleast for the 18th to 21st year you should help him instead of immediately sending him out on his own, let him live at your place for a while but eventually help him buy a house.

Conclusion (cited sources, examples etc)​

notes:

i didn't talk too much about toddler-teenager years in detail since I think in that period you can definitely apply a lot of knowledge from this forum that applies to you onto your son aswell in that period, ofc you want to avoid technology and porn since its other people attempting to get their ideologies implanted into kids so you need to know what your showing them.

i also didn't mention religious values etc and was vague in some areas because I think those can be instilled by taking similar policies to what I said and adapting it to your beliefs, I didn't say my beliefs because I don't know if im right.

also yes I know getting advice from an incel forum to raise your kids is not the smartest but I think you can take aspects from this thread and atleast apply some of it and get you interested in researching different stuff that does give good advice.

i think its kind of important to say you need a decent amount of money so you'll probably be working so ofc you need your wife onboard to fill in if your not there sometimes, but during the early years to toddler years you are needed so you need to atleast save up enough money during that period to be able to stay home.

citations:

I based my thoughts on the "average advice" section off this google search: https://www.artofmanliness.com/people/fatherhood/18-tips-for-being-a-great-dad/ and some other reddit threads since these were the first results and gave some good advice but also some bad advice.

why you should be paranoid during the early years: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infant_mortality shows its pretty common and a lot of ways it can happen

plastics risk: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35177090/, and also these plastics are likely in your house: https://grist.org/science/plastic-chemicals-are-inescapable-and-theyre-messing-with-our-hormones/

LGBT risk: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11106125/

outside effect on eyesight: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5599950/

benefit of homeschooling and social clubs: https://www.uscareerinstitute.edu/blog/pros-and-cons-of-homeschool-for-high-school *addressing cons of this article, it might cost more but some pirate learning material, social clubs address lack of social stuff: https://pce.sandiego.edu/child-development-through-sports/*

in short: avoid plastics, be paranoid, know what philosophy to teach them

don't say dnr or water

 

[got.daim]

@Lefty Rankin do this for your kid, we needed this

 

[Whiteboard7]

Intro
​

(skip to part 1 this is kind of basic advice)

I'm only going to talk about having a son, maybe I'll do a thread for having a daughter but I'm sure much less of you would be interested in that, even if its equally likely to happen.

However, you may as well try to maximize your chances of having a son even if it may fail.

Firstly, to maximize the probability of having a son, research the Whelan and Shettles method. The Whelan method seems to have more evidence which suggests 4-6 days before ovulation leads to the highest probability of having a son since male sperm swim faster, so try to time ovulation over 3 months so you can attempt to have the greatest chance.

Secondly, It's also suggested diet can play a role aswell (bananas, potatoes, meat) 6 weeks before conception and that deep penetration leads to greater chances.

While these aren't well-evidenced, you may as well try them to see if you can increase the odds.

Part 1 – Goals of Fatherhood​

It tends to be that online when you read advice, it usually is based on your wife, or letting your kid explore and find themselves. An especially common sentiment is the "Don't tell your kid what to think, but how to think."

But I am sure many of us would be disappointed by several outcomes of our children, for example what if they have an inherently bad nature and you want to steer them away? While it is impossible to control everything, you can attempt your best to control specific life events in your sons life, while letting the inbetween stages be free.

For me, attempting to come up with an ideal son would be: Decently athletic, smart enough to get through life and succeed, looks good enough to not get gatekept from parts of life, similar philosophical views as myself (or atleast for a time and is able to think beyond me), able to control his life and see risk, knowing to avoid it, and starting the cycle again by having his own kids.

Part 2 – The Early Years​

This covers what you should do from the birth of your son, up until he reaches 18.

Part 2.1: Setting up the environment, and going from birth to the first year.

this early part is basic advice, skip to me saying "thirdly" if you have low attention or think this is obvious

Firstly, atleast in the early years, the most important thing as a father is paranoia. You must be paranoid of every way since infants can die in plenty of ways such as SIDS, where it can be entirely unexpected, know where your children are at all times in the first years and atleast be able to visualize it and create a worst-possible scenario in your head and atleast attempt to reduce its possibility.

Secondly, your wife. You do somewhat have to get her to agree, or atleast be able to convince her that you can take care most of the stuff relating to you and her son. Probably the hardest part.

Thirdly, environmental factors play a huge role. I recommend searching your country (or maybe an ideal place you would go if you have enough money) for statistics on places, for example lowest crime rate, and then move to maybe the 5th lowest crime rate rural or suburban place (suburbs are good but typically you are surrounded by a lot of people, + you can't really control your house too well)

I'd recommend trying to hit atleast 4 of the following qualities: Rural (best since less taxes, farm food nearby)/suburban, low crime, dominant political party of your choosing, still somewhat surrounded by people (this way if you are affected by a crime or your house is broken into you atleast have close places to get to, or incase of injury you can get to a doctor), good economic opportunity (important), good social opportunity, good weather.

Next, change most of your house out, search up materials in beds, pillows, etc, change them out to the best of your economic ability to not have plastics (giving your son better hormones during puberty, allowing for greater height and muscle growth among other things) and always avoid phthalates and plastics that reduce testosterone (plastic bags, shower curtains, food packages, receipts, in dust in the air and water aswell). In general, check any medicine prescribed by doctors, check any material of anything around you, etc, be paranoid.

This part is kind of basic but buy a safe crib (preferably a non-plastic bassinet for the first 6 months to reduce chances of SIDS) for your son to sleep in close to the ground, make sure the entire room is secure and try to sleep in around the same room.

Make sure he is breastfed by your wife (better for jawline, iq, one of the most important things diet-wise in youth).

Now that your environment is good, you have a house in a better area with your wife and agendas set. This should work for about the first year, but now to make your son walk, and talk?

*also i didn't mention doctors and vaccination since I don't know too much about it, but a large majority of advice based on an individual can be applied to your own child so take advice and research it yourself.

Part 2.2: Toddler and Teenage Years

These years are very important and pivotal in shaping a childs personality, the first years affect them physically, but these years affect their intelligence, beliefs, and emotions.

I saw this on one of those basic threads however it is actually good advice, read and speak outloud all the time to your son, having him learn language as early as possible is very important since it contributes to his intelligence, and leads to earlier understanding of philosophy, math, science, religion, and many more fields.

For walking, it is honestly pretty basic, focus on safety, let him practice crawling and standing, then try and get him to walk.

This paragraph will drastically reduce chances of being LGBT, if you end up having multiple kids and one is your son and the other your daughter, don't let their clothes or habits mix and dont let your son engage in your daughters activities. Also, as a father you should be closer to your son then your wife.

Now, make sure your son is outside a lot (but always watch him when outside and be close) through out all points of his life, blindness and glasses can be caused by not being outside enough (not looking in the sun but more like seeing sunlight)

I won't say avoid technology entirely but I'd say slowly ease into it around 15-ish, a lot of bad habits by many of this forum I'm sure can be accounted by having internet access too early. Also, don't be afraid to show your son darker parts of life that exist, to be aware and paranoid is what makes you live longer, and passing on that paranoia to your son is important. For example if you want to somewhat program your kids, find good movies and pick them apart and you can program some of their early life behaviors off that (don't let them do it too much though of course). These movies can be modeled after your values such as religious principles or tradition. Also, you can also use older outdated tech at anytime aswell.

Assuming you are smart enough, then homeschool your son (to not get your son influenced by other people like teachers, principals etc ideologies) and try to raise him in more boy areas (a boxing club, soccer practice etc, still remember to be paranoid since even in these areas you must be aware there are bad people even including some of the kids your son is surrounded by) to get him to be more social and strong.

Try and get your son on good diets (eating meat from a local farm for example, you can easily find good diets on here that apply to yourself, you can apply it to your kid) and be aware of looks, teach him a little about philosophy and religion but you can used controlled opposition to attempt to reinforce beliefs by showing weaker opposition to stronger beliefs for your ideology etc.

After the toddler years it leads to teenage years which have a lot in common, the main thing is just be aware of what you teach your kids, physically and mentally, know how to maintain control and aswell teaching control over your life (one of the most important things to me is to control your life, even if something is beneficial, if it risks making your life lose control then it is not worth it, teach your kid to know when to take risks, control, thoughtfulness of the future).

After a couple years of homeschooling and if you believe you have enough control, I think it could work to bring your son into public school.

I think after easing your son into technology and learning how to use it responsibly for the 16th-18th year of his life, it fits well into him becoming an adult, I still think atleast for the 18th to 21st year you should help him instead of immediately sending him out on his own, let him live at your place for a while but eventually help him buy a house.

Conclusion (cited sources, examples etc)​

notes:

i didn't talk too much about toddler-teenager years in detail since I think in that period you can definitely apply a lot of knowledge from this forum that applies to you onto your son aswell in that period, ofc you want to avoid technology and porn since its other people attempting to get their ideologies implanted into kids so you need to know what your showing them.

i also didn't mention religious values etc and was vague in some areas because I think those can be instilled by taking similar policies to what I said and adapting it to your beliefs, I didn't say my beliefs because I don't know if im right.

also yes I know getting advice from an incel forum to raise your kids is not the smartest but I think you can take aspects from this thread and atleast apply some of it and get you interested in researching different stuff that does give good advice.

i think its kind of important to say you need a decent amount of money so you'll probably be working so ofc you need your wife onboard to fill in if your not there sometimes, but during the early years to toddler years you are needed so you need to atleast save up enough money during that period to be able to stay home.

citations:

I based my thoughts on the "average advice" section off this google search: https://www.artofmanliness.com/people/fatherhood/18-tips-for-being-a-great-dad/ and some other reddit threads since these were the first results and gave some good advice but also some bad advice.

why you should be paranoid during the early years: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infant_mortality shows its pretty common and a lot of ways it can happen

plastics risk: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35177090/, and also these plastics are likely in your house: https://grist.org/science/plastic-chemicals-are-inescapable-and-theyre-messing-with-our-hormones/

LGBT risk: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11106125/

outside effect on eyesight: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5599950/

benefit of homeschooling and social clubs: https://www.uscareerinstitute.edu/blog/pros-and-cons-of-homeschool-for-high-school *addressing cons of this article, it might cost more but some pirate learning material, social clubs address lack of social stuff: https://pce.sandiego.edu/child-development-through-sports/*

in short: avoid plastics, be paranoid, know what philosophy to teach them

don't say dnr or water

Good thoughts this is exactly what I've always wanted to do with my children