pleasevanity
degenerate
- Joined
- Mar 21, 2026
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I'M JUST RANTING I LIKELY DON'T
i'm not diagnosed with the disorder by a healthcare professional nor do i recommend you self diagnose yourself but i feel as if i'm starting to display symptoms, i could be overreacting but i've suspected it for a little while now.
i do not harm myself and i do not have any sort of thoughts of doing so, i only exhibit extreme bursts of anger, overwhelming clinginess (fear of abandonment) and dissociation in general and especially when i'm stressed
there used to be a huge time period of my life where people at school used to call me an "npc" because i used to stare off at the distance at random times and i still do that to this day, it was really weird of them and i never understood why it was a big deal. i could hardly call it bullying but i can say it did get on my nerves. i also tend to break things in huge bursts of anger whenever i bottle things up, i get extremely clingy with people sometimes without even realising it and i am genuinely a social parasite because of that.
just now i've just blocked my ex over overthinking and this is probably the 5th time i've blocked/removed people close to me for no reason. it's even worse because i was the one who broke up with her and i kept eating at her mental health. she really didn't want me to leave her but i cannot deal with the cluelessness of talking to someone and not knowing whether they are in love with me still or starting to talk someone else. it's all my fault to be honest and i could've said things more maturely and healthier but i don't regret breaking up with her at all. i don't really think i can get better without some sort of therapy tbh but i'm honestly not too keen on that
i hate to state this but a couple months prior i used to indulge myself in these psycho2go videos to try and understand myself better, i found myself resonating with the videos covering bpd symptoms and i had a hugeeee confirmation bias of any my subsequent my actions and fear i might've started acting in a more "unstable" manner and started self-affirming it to myself by saying "it's probably cause i have bpd". this makes me scared to think that i probably deluded myself into thinking this way and it gives me serious imposter syndrome sometimes which is why i have to explicitly state that i do not recommend you self-diagnose yourself ever
prob a low iq trait
regardless, i don't really know what i expect out of this thread and probably i'm not expecting a single thing but i just feel as though i need to get somethings off my chest
i'm not diagnosed with the disorder by a healthcare professional nor do i recommend you self diagnose yourself but i feel as if i'm starting to display symptoms, i could be overreacting but i've suspected it for a little while now.
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health condition characterized by intense emotional instability, impulsive behaviors, and unstable relationships. Key symptoms include extreme fear of abandonment, chronic feelings of emptiness, self-harming behavior, intense anger, and, when stressed, severe dissociation or paranoid thoughts. (You can find this overview with 1 google search it's not mine)
i do not harm myself and i do not have any sort of thoughts of doing so, i only exhibit extreme bursts of anger, overwhelming clinginess (fear of abandonment) and dissociation in general and especially when i'm stressed
there used to be a huge time period of my life where people at school used to call me an "npc" because i used to stare off at the distance at random times and i still do that to this day, it was really weird of them and i never understood why it was a big deal. i could hardly call it bullying but i can say it did get on my nerves. i also tend to break things in huge bursts of anger whenever i bottle things up, i get extremely clingy with people sometimes without even realising it and i am genuinely a social parasite because of that.
just now i've just blocked my ex over overthinking and this is probably the 5th time i've blocked/removed people close to me for no reason. it's even worse because i was the one who broke up with her and i kept eating at her mental health. she really didn't want me to leave her but i cannot deal with the cluelessness of talking to someone and not knowing whether they are in love with me still or starting to talk someone else. it's all my fault to be honest and i could've said things more maturely and healthier but i don't regret breaking up with her at all. i don't really think i can get better without some sort of therapy tbh but i'm honestly not too keen on that
i hate to state this but a couple months prior i used to indulge myself in these psycho2go videos to try and understand myself better, i found myself resonating with the videos covering bpd symptoms and i had a hugeeee confirmation bias of any my subsequent my actions and fear i might've started acting in a more "unstable" manner and started self-affirming it to myself by saying "it's probably cause i have bpd". this makes me scared to think that i probably deluded myself into thinking this way and it gives me serious imposter syndrome sometimes which is why i have to explicitly state that i do not recommend you self-diagnose yourself ever
prob a low iq trait
regardless, i don't really know what i expect out of this thread and probably i'm not expecting a single thing but i just feel as though i need to get somethings off my chest
