Got Fired from my job 2 weeks ago, Got job offer today

[AscensionMan98]

I got Fired from my job 2 weeks ago . Its my second job I've gotten fired from since I graduated Uni. This time however I Quit before I would be fired ( HR basically said they would terminate me , but because one of my friends was cool with the manager and overheard it while the roasties manager was drunk in this night out event, he said I should put in my 2 weeks to avoid getting fired ).

So for banks where I was working at the policy is you get sent home but paid if you resign. So on Tuesday I was officially fired, but on Friday I put in my notice. So I ended up getting 2 weeks of pay to chill home.

Today I got a verbal offer.

Unfortunately I agreed to it and said " its within my range". I should have asked for more but given then banking crisis I didn't want to really say much. I also have only 4 months of work experience, so not really the guy who has a lot to negotiate.

The pay is 46.5k, with commissions averaging out to 4000 a year, so 52000. Median rent in this area for a one bedroom is 1600$, with utility 100$ more. But I live with roommates so its 800$ a month with utilities.

 

[AntiCoper]

Low offer is always better than no offer. Plus, for some reason job hunting is way easier when youre employed, I think the desperation when unemployed can be sensed by interviewers

 

[AscensionMan98]

Low offer is always better than no offer. Plus, for some reason job hunting is way easier when youre employed, I think the desperation when unemployed can be sensed by interviewers

Yea it's 7% higher then my previous job anyways. Sucks that it doesn't make up for cost of living but my friend who worked their said that if you give a fuck they will want to promote you.

Also I can work somewhere else worst case if they don't promote me. Only reason I'm in this high cost of living place is cause my tinder match rate is higher .

I can also work over time in another job if I want . But I'll enjoy this summer without wage slaving.

 

[SecularIslamist]

Shit bro. I'm currently under review and may face the same shit

I'm worried. So I started apply but got too lazy as of late.... Did you still get a reference from your old job?

 

[AscensionMan98]

Shit bro. I'm currently under review and may face the same shit

I'm worried. So I started apply but got too lazy as of late.... Did you still get a reference from your old job?

Damn bro if they say specifically " we will meet with hr to discuss what to do ", that means your gonna get fired. But if you got a performance improvement plan it also means your gonna get let go. The catch is if it's a lot of stuff your fucked ( like coming in late , difficulty with basic procedures , not working well with team ). But if it's one thing ( not meeting sales goals or not having good handle time , not doing enough shit in x time ), you will Get likely one more shot till the next time they will can you .

Being under review is not good . Your under the microscope and HR and management will look for reasons to fire .

I got lucky because my other friend over heard the manager while drunk on a night out saying they wanted to fire me.

They told me only they would ask hr what to do and kept saying my performance was bad.

Tbh I did my best but those fuckers made me learn a new system ( I worked at a credit union, like a bank but they use different software ). So their software was hard to get but I got it after a few weeks. The manager also was constantly up my ass as I was afraid of talking with customers while trying to understand their software.

Bank softwares have a lot simpler tools for teller roles.

My job was basically a universal banker role where I did teller and sales stuff. Doing everything can be hard for a newbie . So fuck them for firing me .

But the good news is I'll be working for a bank with tons of branches nationwide . So I can get good opportunities down the road vs this shitty small credit Union ( bank basically ).

My advice is see the feedback they been giving you. If it's been largely negative in general start looking ASAP. Even if it's one thing given the economic environment we are in companies want to reduce staff . So even if you just aren't performing as well they can use it as a excuse to get rid of you while in good economic times they would keep all employees.

 

[SecularIslamist]

Damn bro if they say specifically " we will meet with hr to discuss what to do ", that means your gonna get fired. But if you got a performance improvement plan it also means your gonna get let go. The catch is if it's a lot of stuff your fucked ( like coming in late , difficulty with basic procedures , not working well with team ). But if it's one thing ( not meeting sales goals or not having good handle time , not doing enough shit in x time ), you will Get likely one more shot till the next time they will can you .

Yeah I'm on PIP stage 1. I've been with company for 3+ years and helped transform it. New manager comes in and sees me fuck up on one project (for many reasons) and I'm in the firing line.

Being under review is not good . Your under the microscope and HR and management will look for reasons to fire .

I got lucky because my other friend over heard the manager while drunk on a night out saying they wanted to fire me.

They told me only they would ask hr what to do and kept saying my performance was bad.

My last conversations with my line manager she says shit like 'where do you see your future' and I even openly told her I'm looking for jobs and she seemed enthusiastic jfl

Tbh I did my best but those fuckers made me learn a new system ( I worked at a credit union, like a bank but they use different software ). So their software was hard to get but I got it after a few weeks. The manager also was constantly up my ass as I was afraid of talking with customers while trying to understand their software.

Bank softwares have a lot simpler tools for teller roles.

My job was basically a universal banker role where I did teller and sales stuff. Doing everything can be hard for a newbie . So fuck them for firing me .

This is gonna sound weird but I'm the exact OPPOSITE! I use a lot of techniques and methodologies to analyse data - which only Im used to using proficiently and only I can use in the team. It impresses the client. But I got fucked by deadlines and spending too much time..

But the good news is I'll be working for a bank with tons of branches nationwide . So I can get good opportunities down the road vs this shitty small credit Union ( bank basically ).

How long did it take you to find a job and how many applications did you make before you landed?

I've fallen into the habit of applying for a few and sitting on them to reply. Then I get lazy and don't start applying til I speak with my line manager in 121s

My advice is see the feedback they been giving you. If it's been largely negative in general start looking ASAP. Even if it's one thing given the economic environment we are in companies want to reduce staff . So even if you just aren't performing as well they can use it as a excuse to get rid of you while in good economic times they would keep all employees.

Brutal. I WFH and even bought a house within London commuting distance so I could hybrid work. If I can't find a job I'm gonna struggle to pay mortgage - will have to sell some assets like car to keep payments going for a while.

 

[redmaxx]

I got Fired from my job 2 weeks ago . Its my second job I've gotten fired from since I graduated Uni. This time however I Quit before I would be fired ( HR basically said they would terminate me , but because one of my friends was cool with the manager and overheard it while the roasties manager was drunk in this night out event, he said I should put in my 2 weeks to avoid getting fired ).

So for banks where I was working at the policy is you get sent home but paid if you resign. So on Tuesday I was officially fired, but on Friday I put in my notice. So I ended up getting 2 weeks of pay to chill home.

Today I got a verbal offer.

Unfortunately I agreed to it and said " its within my range". I should have asked for more but given then banking crisis I didn't want to really say much. I also have only 4 months of work experience, so not really the guy who has a lot to negotiate.

The pay is 46.5k, with commissions averaging out to 4000 a year, so 52000. Median rent in this area for a one bedroom is 1600$, with utility 100$ more. But I live with roommates so its 800$ a month with utilities.

Congratulations OP. Definitely better than no job.

 

[AscensionMan98]

Yeah I'm on PIP stage 1. I've been with company for 3+ years and helped transform it. New manager comes in and sees me fuck up on one project (for many reasons) and I'm in the firing line.

My last conversations with my line manager she says shit like 'where do you see your future' and I even openly told her I'm looking for jobs and she seemed enthusiastic jfl

This is gonna sound weird but I'm the exact OPPOSITE! I use a lot of techniques and methodologies to analyse data - which only Im used to using proficiently and only I can use in the team. It impresses the client. But I got fucked by deadlines and spending too much time..


How long did it take you to find a job and how many applications did you make before you landed?

I've fallen into the habit of applying for a few and sitting on them to reply. Then I get lazy and don't start applying til I speak with my line manager in 121s

Brutal. I WFH and even bought a house within London commuting distance so I could hybrid work. If I can't find a job I'm gonna struggle to pay mortgage - will have to sell some assets like car to keep payments going for a while.

New managers can be a cunt. One good thing really working in your favor is tenure. You also have had a history of working well with previous clients and previous work. So that means that people can vouch for your good performance . So overall unlike me seems like you have a good track record

Now one bad thing you did is tell your manager your looking for a new job. This would add incentive to get rid of you earlier as your already looking for jobs, so they think you don't give a fuck. Reiterate that this is where you want to be. That way they have to go down the route of firing you , and given your solid performance the past few years it will be a longer process then some new employee ( like I was )

Overall I would say that it seems like your issue was not too bad, you just didn't do good on this project, but if the rest is good then you can try to talk to your manager and explain how this was a one off thing , and then really start to improve.

But if your PIP was like mines in the last job, where they list a whole slew of things , like attendance or not doing some stuff right, etc , your fucked. Within 4 weeks of a PIP I ended up getting fired. But keep in mind they wrote down a huge list of things I fucked up on including attendance ( I was coming in late a few minutes), not passing this exam on the first try ( it had a 65% pass rate though , but when they want to fire you , everything is looked badly upon that is a mistake , not having good client interactions ( apparently I was pissing off customers but my manager didn't train me well so I took longer which irritated the customers ), and just overall not learning things as fast as the other people.

Btw how many PIP stages are their? I just had 1 stage and then got fired after 4 weeks.

So your PIP in my opinion seems to me, a case of your manager being a cunt, and having some bias against you for one fuck up. Also fuck that roastie for being all smiles when you said your looking for other jobs. Disrespectful cunt thinks she's something special trying to ruin one man's career. Roastie managers always are the worst. Crazy power tripping foid narcs.

If she keeps asking you about your job search that is another sign that things are not looking up for you. She wants you gone.

I think if you can really do well on the next projects, do things in a time efficient manner. You will be fine . That being said if you can sense a general atmosphere of your manager ALWAYS giving you Shit, it may not be YOU, but THE MANAGER. If the manager wants you gone, they will find a reason to get you gone. So if your always getting critiqued when you know you did things right, that is a really bad sign and you need to start applying.

So Another PIP= Your fucked. If you can somehow pass this PIP with flying colors then your Good. But 1 more and then anywhere from 3-6 weeks you get the can.

I got lucky as one of my coworkers gave me referral, and he used to work at the bank where I am going to work. He also knew the manager. So that was a lot of luck my end tbh . No idea why he bothered working in this shit place but for whatever reasons he is here. I applied for every similar positions in all the nearby banks. I got a few interviews, including one with chase ( but I dont think they are gonna take me , cause been like 2 weeks , they said 10 business days max, now 11th ). But the other one is pretty good so whatever

I would say realistically you would need at least a hundred good applications . But some things I have learnt is


1) Fuck indeed. Do not ever use the easy apply. Only apply directly on the website.
2) Fuck the cover letter. Waste of time. The chat GPT ones are also easy to detect, so don't bother using it
3) Get a referral somehow , so attend networking events. And don't be afraid to be direct. You will save time rather then making a fake friendship only to work your way to ask a referral. Just talk about your job search and your skills and how you need a referral. Mention to them that your willing to demonstrate your skills ( this way they don't worry about recommending someone bad ), and your willing to prove yourself , and then you will also give them a cut of your signing bonus and first pay check ( financial incentives will seal the deal if your a good performer but they don't want to recommend some random , money talks at the end of the day ).


Their is also apps like Sharpr , as well as networking events organized online . Attend those and use the apps.

Also talk with your coworkers ( only talk to trusted ones ). They might have worked in a different place before and if it was good then they can recommend you . If your previous manager was cool then you can talk to them.

Also staffing firms are semi legit. They can help you out with bringing the positions to you vs just you applying. So can simplify the process

4) Apply in person ( sounds cringe but its a lot easier to get interview and things move faster )
5) LARP experience on resume . Generally the HR checks for position and start/end date. So you can exxagerate things a lot. If your a junior developer , say senior develoepr. If your just a analyst, add the title Senior Analyst. Bullshit being in a leadership role . And any time in a personality test always make sure your personality reflects the role. So for a sales type role you always are an extrovert type personality. You also never have told a lie and always follow rules ( they ask this stuff in the tests )

My previous experience was as a universal banker but given the fact that I was in training ( I was primarily doing teller roles ), but what did I say I did . I lied my ass off and told them I was running my own book of business. I was the most popular guy in the bank having clients ask for my name . I did hundreds of thousands in deals for loans, investments in Certificates of deposits ( those like bonds that return a measly 5%), referring people to the financial advisor department. I didn't do any of this but my role would eventually lead to me doing it.

But the point is I exaggerated an extreme amount

6) For any sort of Resume gaps in the past ( whether you got fired, or just went on vacation after quitting a job , or just quit a job and had difficulty getting one, etc ). I learnt the hardway that gaps will fuck with you

A) Use a contract excuse. Companies virtually always only say the start and the end dates and position title for verification. They do not say you got fired as its a huge liability problem. I know this as I have myself lied about being fired. This one is good but will work the best if your industry does contracts frequently. If contracts are not really done then it may not come off as genuine which can be a problem

B) The second solution will also work if contracts are rarely done in your industry. I used this one
-Larp taking care of a sick family member. Write this on your resume ( End of Life Care), and put the dates down . This can work up to 9 months in my opinion. But 4-8 months is the ideal time frame

7) If you have no experience in some particular role then Larp with a Bankrupt Company. IT MAY OR MAY NOT WORK. If your applying for a big company its very risky. They tend to be much more careful with checking as they actually have the resources , but if its with a small company it will be a lot easier
-You can photoshop a W2 . Find your previous W2 form or paystubs and then adjust accordingly
-Stick to some sort of entry level position your applying to . If you go for the big baller positions they will look more . However if you want to try then its perfectly fine if you do. Fuck the corporate cucks. Their is always a chance they may not ever know as long as you can do the job.
-This advice is more so for those who have the knowledge and skills, but just have not had prior job experience and want to get a job



-I got a sales rep role with fake experience . But it paid very less , just 12$ and some commission that would supposedly give me 20-30$ a hour. Most people rarely were getting more then 25$, with the average performer getting 20$ when the economic conditions were good, and 15$ when things went to shit ( basically I was going to shill a credit card to random customers walking in the stores, pretty silly if you ask me ). During the early corona times 2020-early 2022 before the fed tightening rates in general were lower, but with higher fed funds rate all rates are impacted including credit cards so no would would want to sign up for it when their already dealing with High APR credit card debt on their current credit cards.
-Whlie their I made about 15$ a hour. I quit after 2 months as after the first month literally had days with zero sales.

8) Keep Applying while you have a job, and you can LARP doctor appointments. Just tell them you have an appointment. If you really want you can fake a medical symptom and let the boss know, but under HIPPA you don't have to tell them shit.

-I got a lot more interview conversion rate while I was employed vs unemployed I larped doctor appointments to do some interviews while working .






9) Bonus strategies- Larp Race, Exxagerate Dates you worked by 1-2 months (if you had short periods )
-In America blacks are seen as the victim so pretending to be black could boost applying chances
-Native Americans are seen as even more victimized, but at least for college admissions they do ask for some tribal affiliation card or something. So its a lot harder to larp that then before. But for jobs not sure. I am sure its worth a shot if one has difficulty getting it
-As for employment dates if you worked more then a year their is no real benefit to exaggerating dates, unless its a mid level role. 2.5 years looks better then 2 years, but generally its easier to just do a exaggeration of 1-2 months to hit that whole number time frame.


Hope this all helps . I can say with confidence your situation is going to be a lot better then mine. I was a new hire in the old place, got fired in lesss then 3 months. So with zero tenure they don't give a fuck. And while they also have been known to fire tenured employees, generally its a longer process especially fi your work has been considered solid tier the past few years you worked, meaning it will take longer for a manager to make a paper trail to fire you.



As for your mortgage problem you would definitely need to apply for unemployment benefits asap. Spam call them. Those lazy bastards sometimes take a while to do their shit. So don't be afraid to call them. But I wouldn't' stress that till you actually get fired.

 

[AscensionMan98]

Congratulations OP. Definitely better than no job.

Yea I would have gotten fired on the spot and gotten zero pay, but instead I got a 2 week vacation to chill at home ( cause banks are paranoid that someone is gonna just redirect all the clients they interacted with on the phones and in person with them to the other bank , so the policy is to make them go to home as soon as possible lol ).

And as for unemployment benefits until you work like at least 7-8 months, you have to wait till this " base quarter period " starts meaning you have to wait a few months till you get unemployment. Pretty shitty to wait a few months for benefits. Its only immediate more so when you work that period

Yea the new job starts next month mid June. Gotta do these background checks and shit.

 

[AscensionMan98]

Low offer is always better than no offer. Plus, for some reason job hunting is way easier when youre employed, I think the desperation when unemployed can be sensed by interviewers

Yea legit bro, I got a much higher interview conversion rate while I was employed, then when my ass got fired and was unemployed. The interviewer even told me that I wouldn't have to take the interview seriously cause I already had a job and they in general grilled me a lot less then when I was unemployed .

Its the same effect as roasties wanting men in relationships more then single men. Many women get a lot more wet thinking of stealing a guy who is with a girlfriend or preferably married if they into diffs.

Also foids like men with kids, while the opposite is true in women.

 

[SecularIslamist]

Holy shit thanks for the essay!

New managers can be a cunt. One good thing really working in your favor is tenure. You also have had a history of working well with previous clients and previous work. So that means that people can vouch for your good performance . So overall unlike me seems like you have a good track record

Now one bad thing you did is tell your manager your looking for a new job. This would add incentive to get rid of you earlier as your already looking for jobs, so they think you don't give a fuck. Reiterate that this is where you want to be. That way they have to go down the route of firing you , and given your solid performance the past few years it will be a longer process then some new employee ( like I was )

My line manager is not new but the manager of my department is.

I just said I'm 'open' to other positions elsewhere but still 'exploring my options whether it's here or elsewhere' - probably not the best thing to say but yeah sounds bad ngl.

Overall I would say that it seems like your issue was not too bad, you just didn't do good on this project, but if the rest is good then you can try to talk to your manager and explain how this was a one off thing , and then really start to improve.

They know I bring skills to the table no one else can. But they also know my skills are highly specialized and I'm 'very good' at doing 20% of my job - in fact sometimes the only one who can. But the other 80% I'm substandard.

But if your PIP was like mines in the last job, where they list a whole slew of things , like attendance or not doing some stuff right, etc , your fucked. Within 4 weeks of a PIP I ended up getting fired. But keep in mind they wrote down a huge list of things I fucked up on including attendance ( I was coming in late a few minutes), not passing this exam on the first try ( it had a 65% pass rate though , but when they want to fire you , everything is looked badly upon that is a mistake , not having good client interactions ( apparently I was pissing off customers but my manager didn't train me well so I took longer which irritated the customers ), and just overall not learning things as fast as the other people.

Sounds like some of it was part of the job. My review lists concerns on things which were truly out of my hands. Like I said I feel like I've been scapegoated for a lot of things - sure some things were my responsibility, but even then I was reliant on other people to help out.

Btw how many PIP stages are their? I just had 1 stage and then got fired after 4 weeks.

Wtf I have 3 stages. 1st stage is 30 day review. Honestly I think I'm going to second because it's graded in red (no improvement), orange (some improvement) and green (improved).

She listed 4 areas I was let's say incompetent in. In our last 121 a week ago I was in orange for 3/4 of them and red in one of them.

So your PIP in my opinion seems to me, a case of your manager being a cunt, and having some bias against you for one fuck up. Also fuck that roastie for being all smiles when you said your looking for other jobs. Disrespectful cunt thinks she's something special trying to ruin one man's career. Roastie managers always are the worst. Crazy power tripping foid narcs.

Complete hoe. I KNOW for a fact they are trying to get rid of me. They even made me do some skills tutorials videos months ago and present internally to upskill other people in our team. So they definitely do think I'm expendable.

If she keeps asking you about your job search that is another sign that things are not looking up for you. She wants you gone.

Fuckkk I know. I have a 121 today I hope she doesn't ask.

At the same time if she does ask it will actually motivate me to look for a job. I haven't applied for a job in 1+ week. So far applied for 10, 9 rejection, one interview but I'm 99% sure I won't get it because I fucked the assessment.

I think if you can really do well on the next projects, do things in a time efficient manner. You will be fine . That being said if you can sense a general atmosphere of your manager ALWAYS giving you Shit, it may not be YOU, but THE MANAGER. If the manager wants you gone, they will find a reason to get you gone. So if your always getting critiqued when you know you did things right, that is a really bad sign and you need to start applying.

This is happening all the time! Literally everything I do - even though they don't understand the process it takes they demand the fucking world!

So Another PIP= Your fucked. If you can somehow pass this PIP with flying colors then your Good. But 1 more and then anywhere from 3-6 weeks you get the can.

I got lucky as one of my coworkers gave me referral, and he used to work at the bank where I am going to work. He also knew the manager. So that was a lot of luck my end tbh . No idea why he bothered working in this shit place but for whatever reasons he is here. I applied for every similar positions in all the nearby banks. I got a few interviews, including one with chase ( but I dont think they are gonna take me , cause been like 2 weeks , they said 10 business days max, now 11th ). But the other one is pretty good so whatever

Wait you got a referral from your colleague? I have a lot of people I can get along with but I thought the only person I could get referral from was my line manager and department manager - both who hate me. I get along with other seniors though...

I would say realistically you would need at least a hundred good applications . But some things I have learnt is


1) Fuck indeed. Do not ever use the easy apply. Only apply directly on the website.

Yeah I do this. I just use Indeed to search for the job

2) Fuck the cover letter. Waste of time. The chat GPT ones are also easy to detect, so don't bother using it

Really? I've been using ChatGPT Although modifying it slightly. I

3) Get a referral somehow , so attend networking events. And don't be afraid to be direct. You will save time rather then making a fake friendship only to work your way to ask a referral. Just talk about your job search and your skills and how you need a referral. Mention to them that your willing to demonstrate your skills ( this way they don't worry about recommending someone bad ), and your willing to prove yourself , and then you will also give them a cut of your signing bonus and first pay check ( financial incentives will seal the deal if your a good performer but they don't want to recommend some random , money talks at the end of the day ).

Bro I'm too high inhib to talk to autists on this site.

Their is also apps like Sharpr , as well as networking events organized online . Attend those and use the apps.

I'll look into it but like I said I'm high inhib.

In a work environment I can easily fake NTness. In fact I just onboarded a new foid at my workplace and she asked me 'is everyone else social' - I was thinking bitch I'm the antisocial one here JFL

Also talk with your coworkers ( only talk to trusted ones ). They might have worked in a different place before and if it was good then they can recommend you . If your previous manager was cool then you can talk to them.

Even the trusted ones I don't want them to spread. Not sure how much I can trust them tbh, sure they have my best interests at heart but on a drunk night like with yours they could let slip a word about me and rumours may spread I wanna leave asap.

I've already told one of my 'trusted' co workers I can't see myself here beyond September. Bad move wish I never said it.

Also staffing firms are semi legit. They can help you out with bringing the positions to you vs just you applying. So can simplify the process

4) Apply in person ( sounds cringe but its a lot easier to get interview and things move faster )

Not sure the places which I apply do that kinda stuff anyway. I'm not in a face to face role. I literally WFH most days so all mostly digital.

5) LARP experience on resume . Generally the HR checks for position and start/end date. So you can exxagerate things a lot. If your a junior developer , say senior develoepr. If your just a analyst, add the title Senior Analyst. Bullshit being in a leadership role . And any time in a personality test always make sure your personality reflects the role. So for a sales type role you always are an extrovert type personality. You also never have told a lie and always follow rules ( they ask this stuff in the tests )

I'm already been senior in my position but yeah I will larp on my CV. Two of the other companies I've worked at have gone out of business so I can easily larp on them and they won't be able to ask referral.

My previous experience was as a universal banker but given the fact that I was in training ( I was primarily doing teller roles ), but what did I say I did . I lied my ass off and told them I was running my own book of business. I was the most popular guy in the bank having clients ask for my name . I did hundreds of thousands in deals for loans, investments in Certificates of deposits ( those like bonds that return a measly 5%), referring people to the financial advisor department. I didn't do any of this but my role would eventually lead to me doing it.

But the point is I exaggerated an extreme amount

They didn't ask for proof for this? How tf is that possible?

I larp and say I am 'advanced' on Excel, PowerBI - but I'm comparing myself to boomers who can't even copy and paste stuff jfl.

6) For any sort of Resume gaps in the past ( whether you got fired, or just went on vacation after quitting a job , or just quit a job and had difficulty getting one, etc ). I learnt the hardway that gaps will fuck with you

Yeah I know.

A) Use a contract excuse. Companies virtually always only say the start and the end dates and position title for verification. They do not say you got fired as its a huge liability problem. I know this as I have myself lied about being fired. This one is good but will work the best if your industry does contracts frequently. If contracts are not really done then it may not come off as genuine which can be a problem

Yeah if I get fired no fucking way I'm saying I was underperforming. I'm just going to say I wanted a career change and decided to take a career break before it - if it takes too long to get a kob

Sure as you mentioned gaps fuck with you but I'll have nothing else to say.

B) The second solution will also work if contracts are rarely done in your industry. I used this one
-Larp taking care of a sick family member. Write this on your resume ( End of Life Care), and put the dates down . This can work up to 9 months in my opinion. But 4-8 months is the ideal time frame

Actually a good idea never thought of this - better than 'holiday'. My father passed away give years ago so it's not like they're going to ask for a death certificate JFL

Actually I never applied to jobs post education because of that

7) If you have no experience in some particular role then Larp with a Bankrupt Company. IT MAY OR MAY NOT WORK. If your applying for a big company its very risky. They tend to be much more careful with checking as they actually have the resources , but if its with a small company it will be a lot easier
-You can photoshop a W2 . Find your previous W2 form or paystubs and then adjust accordingly
-Stick to some sort of entry level position your applying to . If you go for the big baller positions they will look more . However if you want to try then its perfectly fine if you do. Fuck the corporate cucks. Their is always a chance they may not ever know as long as you can do the job.
-This advice is more so for those who have the knowledge and skills, but just have not had prior job experience and want to get a job

Don't think I'll go to this level of fakery admittedly. Like I said two of the companies I worked at went under so I can larp my skills, but to larp an entire company I never worked for...

I can understand there's so many smart people and unrealised potential out there who never get a job because they don't have X amount of years at a company.

Also regarding big four just got rejected by McKinsey and Bain. Also got rejected by Boston consulting so it's over.

-I got a sales rep role with fake experience .

Respect if you've done this and got away with it JFL. They never verified l?

But it paid very less , just 12$ and some commission that would supposedly give me 20-30$ a hour. Most people rarely were getting more then 25$, with the average performer getting 20$ when the economic conditions were good, and 15$ when things went to shit ( basically I was going to shill a credit card to random customers walking in the stores, pretty silly if you ask me ). During the early corona times 2020-early 2022 before the fed tightening rates in general were lower, but with higher fed funds rate all rates are impacted including credit cards so no would would want to sign up for it when their already dealing with High APR credit card debt on their current credit cards.
-Whlie their I made about 15$ a hour. I quit after 2 months as after the first month literally had days with zero sales.

8) Keep Applying while you have a job, and you can LARP doctor appointments. Just tell them you have an appointment. If you really want you can fake a medical symptom and let the boss know, but under HIPPA you don't have to tell them shit.

-I got a lot more interview conversion rate while I was employed vs unemployed I larped doctor appointments to do some interviews while working .

Yeah same. The interview I had I actually took TOIL but I will do doctors appt. In my three years I've been here I've probably ONLY ever had like 3 sick days not lying. Some motherfuckers take a couple every month wtf.

9) Bonus strategies- Larp Race, Exxagerate Dates you worked by 1-2 months (if you had short periods )
-In America blacks are seen as the victim so pretending to be black could boost applying chances
-Native Americans are seen as even more victimized, but at least for college admissions they do ask for some tribal affiliation card or something. So its a lot harder to larp that then before. But for jobs not sure. I am sure its worth a shot if one has difficulty getting it
-As for employment dates if you worked more then a year their is no real benefit to exaggerating dates, unless its a mid level role. 2.5 years looks better then 2 years, but generally its easier to just do a exaggeration of 1-2 months to hit that whole number time frame.

Yeah I already do this regarding length of exp.

I'm already ethnic minority in UK lol in fact I think I got my job partly because I was ethnic JfL. This actually goes both ways.

Most people I work with are white - yet they are the most SJW cucks who always talk about inclusivity. They want an ethnic so they can virtue signal but one who talks and acts like them so whitewashed.

Hope this all helps . I can say with confidence your situation is going to be a lot better then mine. I was a new hire in the old place, got fired in lesss then 3 months. So with zero tenure they don't give a fuck. And while they also have been known to fire tenured employees, generally its a longer process especially fi your work has been considered solid tier the past few years you worked, meaning it will take longer for a manager to make a paper trail to fire you.

Yeah I'm definitely in a 'good' position regarding experienxe. The problem is the industry I've worked in is very niche but I've got "transferrable skills" (lol at this term). I'm probably seen as an expert in one field (which is not true) but doesn't help if I apply elsewhere.

Like if my role is "analyst" but I carried out other duties like marketing, sales, PR - they won't see this side of things.

As for your mortgage problem you would definitely need to apply for unemployment benefits asap. Spam call them. Those lazy bastards sometimes take a while to do their shit. So don't be afraid to call them. But I wouldn't' stress that till you actually get fired.

I think I'll be fine a bit. Because if I get this my brother owns a restaurant and I can work on the low off the book and get extra money tax free while claiming NEETbux. Some guys earn nearly as much as me doing this despite me having lifelong student loan and 'professional' middle class job in the city. Seriously considering this but I know it's gonna fuck my CV.

 

[SecularIslamist]

@AscensionMan98 thanks for top tier advice wish I could rep you more than once

 

[Deleted member 2381]

Glad I don't have any problems at my new job. I've also been fired twice for being too low inhb and talking back to manager. I just can't let these oldcel wagecuck failures talk to me like they think they mog me, or trying to belittle me when I did the job perfectly fine. I refuse to be a pathetic doormat to these power hungry middle managers who have achieved nothing

My new manager is a gymcelled HTN hyper NT jock who I get along with

 

[AscensionMan98]

Glad I don't have any problems at my new job. I've also been fired twice for being too low inhb and talking back to manager. I just can't let these oldcel wagecuck failures talk to me like they think they mog me, or trying to belittle me when I did the job perfectly fine. I refuse to be a pathetic doormat to these power hungry middle managers who have achieved nothing

My new manager is a gymcelled HTN hyper NT jock who I get along with

Welcome to to gotten fired club. I was pretty desperate to keep this job so never talked shit in the beginning but once I knew it was over I started to argue with the roastie manager calling her biased and deliberately undermining me to screw me over. I also made sure to smile at everyone except her lmao.

The new place my former coworker recommended me and he was the manager at the time for her ( and she got promoted to the manager now after the quit a few years ago ). I 'm surprised he is still in good relations with her but no cap this guy is very charismatic and his phone is buzzing all the time. The roasties seemed to like me which was good. She didn't seem that serious compared to the last manager.

And the best part is they said the training period is 3 months, while in the last job it was literally just 1.5 weeks and then I had to do the normal job. JFL. How the fuck am I supposed to learn everything in 2 weeks, when most banks have a 3-6 month training program.

 

[SecularIslamist]

Glad I don't have any problems at my new job. I've also been fired twice for being too low inhb and talking back to manager. I just can't let these oldcel wagecuck failures talk to me like they think they mog me, or trying to belittle me when I did the job perfectly fine. I refuse to be a pathetic doormat to these power hungry middle managers who have achieved nothing

Wagie wagie get back in cagie.

Mirin low inhib tho. After spending like 1.5yrs post graduation looking for a job I've conditioned myself to be in deference to boomers above me.

These are the same people who ask me how to do a simple SUM formula on an Excel spreadsheet JFL.

They have one thing I don't and that's what gets you ahead in life and @AscensionMan98 touched up on it: soft skills. If you're charismatic, NT, posh accent and get along with people you get leapfrogged in your career.

Smart but high inhib retards like me are just slaves.

 

[AscensionMan98]

Holy shit thanks for the essay!

My line manager is not new but the manager of my department is.

I just said I'm 'open' to other positions elsewhere but still 'exploring my options whether it's here or elsewhere' - probably not the best thing to say but yeah sounds bad ngl.

You can salvage it by saying you really like working here . Make it a challenge for them to get rid of you so you buy yourself more time. Once your fully unemployed the job search is a lot harder.

They know I bring skills to the table no one else can. But they also know my skills are highly specialized and I'm 'very good' at doing 20% of my job - in fact sometimes the only one who can. But the other 80% I'm substandard.

Its good you got that highly specialized skills, but you need to bring the remaining 80% to acceptable standards. How would you say you are lacking and what do you think you can do to improve

Sounds like some of it was part of the job. My review lists concerns on things which were truly out of my hands. Like I said I feel like I've been scapegoated for a lot of things - sure some things were my responsibility, but even then I was reliant on other people to help out.

Wtf I have 3 stages. 1st stage is 30 day review. Honestly I think I'm going to second because it's graded in red (no improvement), orange (some improvement) and green (improved).

Lucky you got 3 stages .One PIP for me and I was fucked. So it seems that you have a total of 90 days , and 3 reds= your gone

She listed 4 areas I was let's say incompetent in. In our last 121 a week ago I was in orange for 3/4 of them and red in one of them.

Its good you got most of them orange, but all they need is one red and a biased manager can use that as a paper trail to get rid of you

Complete hoe. I KNOW for a fact they are trying to get rid of me. They even made me do some skills tutorials videos months ago and present internally to upskill other people in our team. So they definitely do think I'm expendable.

Damn bro yea in that case their definetly trying to fuck you over. You gotta take the job search seriously then. Do like 5-10 good applications a day. Forget the cover letter, too much time. Apply some in lunch and after work. And make it worthwhile by getting a pay bump and some company you have your eyes are

Fuckkk I know. I have a 121 today I hope she doesn't ask.

At the same time if she does ask it will actually motivate me to look for a job. I haven't applied for a job in 1+ week. So far applied for 10, 9 rejection, one interview but I'm 99% sure I won't get it because I fucked the assessment.

This is happening all the time! Literally everything I do - even though they don't understand the process it takes they demand the fucking world!

If their up your ass on everything you do that's a bad sign. You can try to explain it but it seems this manager is trying to find excuses. If explaining doesn't work then its clear they got a bias against you

Wait you got a referral from your colleague? I have a lot of people I can get along with but I thought the only person I could get referral from was my line manager and department manager - both who hate me. I get along with other seniors though...

Yeah I do this. I just use Indeed to search for the job

Yea my colleague who worked same place as me and likes me referred me to a previous place he worked at. He also knew the manager still and put in a good word before my interview , so I had a really easy interview. This is very lucky tbh. You rarely get the door that open for you. They didn't ask any hard questions lol. I had a gap of 10 months due to being fired and every employer has grilled me on that , as well as me wanting to leave so soon ( I got fired after 2.5 months, but said I was currently employed as I was applying right before I got fired lol . And even after the fire date I still said I was currently employed ).

Really? I've been using ChatGPT Although modifying it slightly. I

Waste of time. You can use the Chat GPT cover letter but most of the time they don't really read the cover letter. If you find yourself personally getting a higher conversion rate with a cover letter then use it, but the most time efficient manner is just having a copy past generic cover letter where you interchange the company name. Doing a custom one is going to take FOREVER and won't really help you. Experience, Referrals, and Good Interviewing ( including the gay assessments ) are the top 3 most important things from my experience to getting a job.

Bro I'm too high inhib to talk to autists on this site.

I'll look into it but like I said I'm high inhib.

You HAVE to be low inhibition and do the referral strategy. Your colleagues are the best bet as they know you . Chances are you won't have to bribe them, but be prepared if they on the fence . Ask them where they have previously worked at, and explain your concerns to a trusted one.

In a work environment I can easily fake NTness. In fact I just onboarded a new foid at my workplace and she asked me 'is everyone else social' - I was thinking bitch I'm the antisocial one here JFL

Yup you can be low inhibition if you try

Even the trusted ones I don't want them to spread. Not sure how much I can trust them tbh, sure they have my best interests at heart but on a drunk night like with yours they could let slip a word about me and rumours may spread I wanna leave asap.

I made friends with a trusted co worker, who went out with those drunk manager and then relayed the information . I knew before hand he was highly experienced and he was a easy person to get along with and genuine. He mentioned working previously in 2 banks that I liked.

I've already told one of my 'trusted' co workers I can't see myself here beyond September. Bad move wish I never said it.

Its fine. Use your judgement on a good coworker , and see if they have worked in any noteworthy places before that you like. If they have not then no need to really ask them

Not sure the places which I apply do that kinda stuff anyway. I'm not in a face to face role. I literally WFH most days so all mostly digital.

Most places have some corporate office, so its worth a shot

I'm already been senior in my position but yeah I will larp on my CV. Two of the other companies I've worked at have gone out of business so I can easily larp on them and they won't be able to ask referral.

They didn't ask for proof for this? How tf is that possible?

Nice nice , and as for references I listed my colleague recommending me as the head branch manager even though he is not. Just list your coworkers who you get along with well as your manager or your former manager, or a trusted friend if you have no one in your company. I was the manager for one of my friends

I larp and say I am 'advanced' on Excel, PowerBI - but I'm comparing myself to boomers who can't even copy and paste stuff jfl.

Yeah I know.

Nice nice, larp other programs that they want you to know that you can reasonably learn at a quick spee

Yeah if I get fired no fucking way I'm saying I was underperforming. I'm just going to say I wanted a career change and decided to take a career break before it - if it takes too long to get a kob

Sure as you mentioned gaps fuck with you but I'll have nothing else to say.

See if you say you quit though, they think your a QUITTER. And quitting generally applies to a industry change . Your not really changing industries so its not the best reasoning.

And myself I tried the quitting excused. Their was a decent amount of times where interviewers seemed to be wondering why I wanted to transition ( I was applying for sales roles vs finance roles).

So that's why the contract ending is a better lie tbh

Actually a good idea never thought of this - better than 'holiday'. My father passed away give years ago so it's not like they're going to ask for a death certificate JFL

Actually I never applied to jobs post education because of that

They won't bother checking with that and I used it cover my previous gaps. Interviewers became a lot kinder about the gap and sometimes they wouldn't even mention it. Other times idiotic interviewers would ask me about the gap despite listing it, and they just wanted me to say the reason and they then moved on.

Only 1 roastie was super rude asking me why I didn't join back. I said I wanted something closer to home and that the position was not available in the city I was in for me specifically .

Don't think I'll go to this level of fakery admittedly. Like I said two of the companies I worked at went under so I can larp my skills, but to larp an entire company I never worked for...

This hellish job environment that is ruthless to recent college grads and others that have no experience demands that.

I can understand there's so many smart people and unrealised potential out there who never get a job because they don't have X amount of years at a company.

Yup exactly. Even for some shitty sales position I had trouble getting in but after making up a sales position I got that first sales job briefly.

Also regarding big four just got rejected by McKinsey and Bain. Also got rejected by Boston consulting so it's over.

Respect if you've done this and got away with it JFL. They never verified l?

Yea the company never bothered even asking for the W2 form. It was a lower paying job as well, base of 12-15$, 12$ first 3 months, and then 15$ after. With commissions you were averaging 20-22$ in 2020-2021, but then with higher interest rates the sales for the credit cards collapsed and then that's when I joined. I got literally 1-2 sales a day, so I realized it was pointless. I also realized I could not apply for many jobs doing that Job, so I quit after a few weeks lol

Yeah same. The interview I had I actually took TOIL but I will do doctors appt. In my three years I've been here I've probably ONLY ever had like 3 sick days not lying. Some motherfuckers take a couple every month wtf.

Yeah I already do this regarding length of exp.

Nice nice. Yea take as many appointments as you need. In the US it still uses your Paid time off, not sure how it works their. Personally I think doctor appointments should NOT be using Paid Time Off cause that is for a vacation .

I'm already ethnic minority in UK lol in fact I think I got my job partly because I was ethnic JfL. This actually goes both ways.

Most people I work with are white - yet they are the most SJW cucks who always talk about inclusivity. They want an ethnic so they can virtue signal but one who talks and acts like them so whitewashed.

Well looks like it worked in your favor. Whatever ethnicity is the most " victim " you write that down in your race. They can't verify race. So what you look a bit different then how they look. Make sure to remove the native language on the app. That would reveal the lie if your larping say black, and your Arab, don't say arabic ( though technically their are blacks in Arab countries so it can work )

Yeah I'm definitely in a 'good' position regarding experienxe. The problem is the industry I've worked in is very niche but I've got "transferrable skills" (lol at this term). I'm probably seen as an expert in one field (which is not true) but doesn't help if I apply elsewhere.

Nice nice yea whenever you have interviews , make sure to shill to the interviewer how your skills fit, because when they ask the usual " tell me about your experience " , you have to make sure those artists understand the link between your experience and the future job. You literally have to spell it out for them as often times they just will say " oh sorry ur not qualified but have impressive resume"

Like if my role is "analyst" but I carried out other duties like marketing, sales, PR - they won't see this side of things.

I think I'll be fine a bit. Because if I get this my brother owns a restaurant and I can work on the low off the book and get extra money tax free while claiming NEETbux. Some guys earn nearly as much as me doing this despite me having lifelong student loan and 'professional' middle class job in the city. Seriously considering this but I know it's gonna fuck my CV.

Curious how much are you making with your data analyst position. If you want to make a career switch then that could work . If your brother owns a restaurant maybe he can pay you in cash so you avoid paying the tax man . The only catch is you cannot put that money in a bank account. But if you can get some vault set up it can work . You would make a lot more when taxes are out of the equation.

If possible see if you can also do some data analyst stuff for your brother business so you dont' forget everything. And keep reviewing your notes regularly, and maybe doing some projects as well on the free time. if your brother has nothing that use your skills. Just to keep the sword sharp.

 

[SecularIslamist]

You can salvage it by saying you really like working here . Make it a challenge for them to get rid of you so you buy yourself more time. Once your fully unemployed the job search is a lot harder.

Its good you got that highly specialized skills, but you need to bring the remaining 80% to acceptable standards. How would you say you are lacking and what do you think you can do to improve

When I say the other 80% - this job is a 'jack of all trades job' I'm a "consultant" - aka trusted source of authority who provides advice.

Lucky you got 3 stages .One PIP for me and I was fucked. So it seems that you have a total of 90 days , and 3 reds= your gone

Its good you got most of them orange, but all they need is one red and a biased manager can use that as a paper trail to get rid of you

You know what that red flag was? It was asking a question to our client clarifying who's doing what? And my bitch line manager is like you made it seem like you 'dont know'. She's said this multiple times over the years - that's I'm 'too honest' sometimes.

Like sure bitch let's just say yes to everything our clients say and figure out what we're doing later.

Damn bro yea in that case their definetly trying to fuck you over. You gotta take the job search seriously then. Do like 5-10 good applications a day. Forget the cover letter, too much time. Apply some in lunch and after work. And make it worthwhile by getting a pay bump and some company you have your eyes are

Literally got lazy af. Need to stay off .org tbh... I applied to about 10-15 last two weeks. And got 1 interview, 9 rejections and maybe waiting for 5 (let's say 4 of them won't get back lol)


A big problem is it's not only hard to find a job similar to mine, but also find one that pays the same wage. It's a competitive field - that's cliche to say anywhere, but I really mean it for this. Like if I was a full on "analyst" Id have more of a chance because there is more jobs for that available. Instead I have skills too broad to reapply to a profession in a senior role.

If their up your ass on everything you do that's a bad sign. You can try to explain it but it seems this manager is trying to find excuses. If explaining doesn't work then its clear they got a bias against you

Yea my colleague who worked same place as me and likes me referred me to a previous place he worked at. He also knew the manager still and put in a good word before my interview , so I had a really easy interview. This is very lucky tbh. You rarely get the door that open for you. They didn't ask any hard questions lol. I had a gap of 10 months due to being fired and every employer has grilled me on that , as well as me wanting to leave so soon ( I got fired after 2.5 months, but said I was currently employed as I was applying right before I got fired lol . And even after the fire date I still said I was currently employed ).

That's quite good - they knew each other. Thats key tbh. I should mention I only got this job I'm at now via a referral myself.

Waste of time. You can use the Chat GPT cover letter but most of the time they don't really read the cover letter. If you find yourself personally getting a higher conversion rate with a cover letter then use it, but the most time efficient manner is just having a copy past generic cover letter where you interchange the company name. Doing a custom one is going to take FOREVER and won't really help you. Experience, Referrals, and Good Interviewing ( including the gay assessments ) are the top 3 most important things from my experience to getting a job.

I do use the same one I don't rewrite from scratch. But I do tailor it by researching the company before hand to make it seem like I'm interested.

You HAVE to be low inhibition and do the referral strategy. Your colleagues are the best bet as they know you . Chances are you won't have to bribe them, but be prepared if they on the fence . Ask them where they have previously worked at, and explain your concerns to a trusted one.

Yup you can be low inhibition if you try

I know this is true. But prior to this is changing my entire mindset. If I was low inhib I doubt I'd be on this forum in the first place lmao.

Nice nice , and as for references I listed my colleague recommending me as the head branch manager even though he is not. Just list your coworkers who you get along with well as your manager or your former manager, or a trusted friend if you have no one in your company. I was the manager for one of my friends

No where near low inhib enough to fake it. But yeah I will definitely do my 'trusted' colleague.

Nice nice, larp other programs that they want you to know that you can reasonably learn at a quick spee

Larping is all fine until you have to do an assessment and don't know shit. Before I got my current job, I larped I know how to use R once but I couldn't be bothered to learn it and fucked it.

Depends on the programme. Stuff which can be learnt within a week is fine.

See if you say you quit though, they think your a QUITTER. And quitting generally applies to a industry change . Your not really changing industries so its not the best reasoning.

And myself I tried the quitting excused. Their was a decent amount of times where interviewers seemed to be wondering why I wanted to transition ( I was applying for sales roles vs finance roles).

I still have time.. Worst case scenario is I get fired end of July. I can larp an extra two months that should give me enough time to get a job by Autumn tbh. Worst case scenario but preferable

So that's why the contract ending is a better lie tbh

Also depends..In many cases when people join on an X year contract in most cases it's extended.

They won't bother checking with that and I used it cover my previous gaps. Interviewers became a lot kinder about the gap and sometimes they wouldn't even mention it. Other times idiotic interviewers would ask me about the gap despite listing it, and they just wanted me to say the reason and they then moved on.

Only 1 roastie was super rude asking me why I didn't join back. I said I wanted something closer to home and that the position was not available in the city I was in for me specifically .

Are they the company or recruitment consultant? I find the latter are more suspect of gaps. Companies have their own staff interviewing usually without an eye to spot these things or consider it a red flag if they have a gap.

This hellish job environment that is ruthless to recent college grads and others that have no experience demands that.

It's a classic catch 22 situation. Can't get a job w/o experience, can't get experience w/o a job. Even some of these roles which say 'no experience needed' end up hiring people with experience because of how competitive it is.

Yup exactly. Even for some shitty sales position I had trouble getting in but after making up a sales position I got that first sales job briefly.

Mirin. Tbh being in a sales position sounds like you have to chat a lot of shit anyway

Nice nice. Yea take as many appointments as you need. In the US it still uses your Paid time off, not sure how it works their. Personally I think doctor appointments should NOT be using Paid Time Off cause that is for a vacation .

I'm in UK. We can easily get a doctors. Heck one of my foid colleague kept droning on about 'muh mental health' and spent two weeks off.

Well looks like it worked in your favor. Whatever ethnicity is the most " victim " you write that down in your race. They can't verify race. So what you look a bit different then how they look. Make sure to remove the native language on the app. That would reveal the lie if your larping say black, and your Arab, don't say arabic ( though technically their are blacks in Arab countries so it can work )

Lol I'm curry but can easily larp Arab and I have Turkic sounding name. I get guesses from everywhere but I act like a social justice warrior at work. London is the capital for that kind of attitude.

London has a lot of ethnics but central London where the rich go to work is white af. The only ethnics working there actually tend to be whitewashed ethnics - or those who act it, like myself

Nice nice yea whenever you have interviews , make sure to shill to the interviewer how your skills fit, because when they ask the usual " tell me about your experience " , you have to make sure those artists understand the link between your experience and the future job. You literally have to spell it out for them as often times they just will say " oh sorry ur not qualified but have impressive resume"

My interviewing isn't so bad. It's just repeating myself using different words I fall prey to.

Every time they say that question I just say the same normies shit 'I graduated in XXX in 2018, I worked for XXX doing this then joined XX and learnt new ways to do this' it's bullshit but I feel like it works.

Curious how much are you making with your data analyst position. If you want to make a career switch then that could work

Almost higher tax band in UK. But that means fuck all when you have so much deductions tbh

. If your brother owns a restaurant maybe he can pay you in cash so you avoid paying the tax man . The only catch is you cannot put that money in a bank account. But if you can get some vault set up it can work . You would make a lot more when taxes are out of the equation.

If possible see if you can also do some data analyst stuff for your brother business so you dont' forget everything.

Lmao basically a fast food driver. My role their would involve delivery or waitering. Nothing else.

But it's amazing how I can easily get £1600 tax free working there + NEETBUX of like £400. That's more than the average wage minus deductions like tax, NI, student loans, pensions.

And keep reviewing your notes regularly, and maybe doing some projects as well on the free time. if your brother has nothing that use your skills. Just to keep the sword sharp.

Yeah worst case scenario I'm even thinking of using things like Fiverr.com to freelance. But pay is shite af since they usually get IT support in India to help them jfl