gintoki sataka
Iron
- Joined
- Dec 29, 2025
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Hey everyone, I've been lurking here for a while and seen a lot of threads about how hard it is to make friends when you're ugly. Being incel isn't just about girls—it's the whole social thing that sucks. Normies make it look easy, but if you're recessed or whatever, people just don't approach you the same way. I've struggled with this myself, and after trying a bunch of stuff, here's what actually helped me start building some connections. This isn't bluepill bullshit; it's real talk for guys like us. If you're truecel, it's going to be an uphill battle, but rotting alone makes everything worse. Let's get into it.
Blackpill is brutal: looks affect everything, including friendships. Good-looking people get that halo where everyone wants to talk to them. If you're subhuman, you don't get that, and it can make you bitter. But dwelling on it 24/7 keeps you isolated. I used to think "it's over" and never try, but that just left me with zero people to talk to.
What worked: List out your failos honestly, but also note anything you're decent at, like a hobby or skill. It helps shift your mindset from total defeat to seeing yourself as someone who can add value in a group. Watch some videos on dealing with low self-esteem—they're not all cope, some actually address feeling ugly without lying about it.
You can't ignore looksmaxxing if you want people to stick around. Being ugly is one thing, but looking like you don't care at all repels everyone. Start with the basics to avoid that instant negative reaction.
This stuff helped me get past the first impression barrier. People on here say the same—ugly guys with effort still manage to find bros.
Don't waste time in spots where looks are everything, like parties full of normies. Go where shared interests matter more, and your face isn't the main focus. Ugly dudes on the forum talk about bonding over hobbies because that's what keeps people coming back.
Stick to male-dominated groups if female ones trigger you. The key is showing up consistently and talking about the common interest. One event a week is a solid start.
If you're NT-low, being ugly makes it twice as hard. You have to be deliberate about not coming off awkward. From what I've read and tried, it's about being reliable and listening more than talking.
Books like "How to Win Friends" have practical advice, even if it's old. Channels that talk about loneliness for introverts helped me too—they get the blackpill side without sugarcoating.
Rejection happens, especially if your looks are a failo. Some people will drift away, but focus on the ones who don't. If you're feeling stuck, talk to someone here or consider therapy to build resilience. It's not about fixing everything overnight; it's about small steps.
Once you have one or two connections, invite them for low-key stuff like gaming online. It grows from there.
In the end, making friends as an ugly incel isn't easy—forum threads show that. But accepting the blackpill doesn't mean giving up entirely. Focus on what you can control, and it gets better than total isolation. Share your experiences below; maybe we can help each other out.
1. Face the Reality and Move Past It
Blackpill is brutal: looks affect everything, including friendships. Good-looking people get that halo where everyone wants to talk to them. If you're subhuman, you don't get that, and it can make you bitter. But dwelling on it 24/7 keeps you isolated. I used to think "it's over" and never try, but that just left me with zero people to talk to.
What worked: List out your failos honestly, but also note anything you're decent at, like a hobby or skill. It helps shift your mindset from total defeat to seeing yourself as someone who can add value in a group. Watch some videos on dealing with low self-esteem—they're not all cope, some actually address feeling ugly without lying about it.
2. Get Your Appearance to a Basic Level
You can't ignore looksmaxxing if you want people to stick around. Being ugly is one thing, but looking like you don't care at all repels everyone. Start with the basics to avoid that instant negative reaction.
- Grooming: Keep your hair clean and styled to hide weak spots. Use products for skin if you have acne. It doesn't fix everything, but it makes you less off-putting.
- Fitness: Hit the gym regularly. Aim to lower body fat and build some muscle—it improves your frame and how you carry yourself. Even if your face is bad, this can give you a bit more presence.
- Clothes: Wear stuff that fits properly. Simple, dark colors work if you're trying to fraud a better silhouette. You don't need expensive brands; just avoid looking sloppy.
This stuff helped me get past the first impression barrier. People on here say the same—ugly guys with effort still manage to find bros.
3. Pick the Right Places to Meet People
Don't waste time in spots where looks are everything, like parties full of normies. Go where shared interests matter more, and your face isn't the main focus. Ugly dudes on the forum talk about bonding over hobbies because that's what keeps people coming back.
- Online: Easier entry point. Join Discords or subreddits for gaming, anime, or whatever you're into. Post about stuff you know, like "looking for someone to team up in this game." It builds from there without face-to-face pressure.
- In Person: Look for meetups on apps like Meetup.com. Gaming stores for card games or tabletop stuff are good—lots of guys who aren't judging on looks. Sports groups or volunteering can work too, as long as it's mostly male to avoid extra stress.
Stick to male-dominated groups if female ones trigger you. The key is showing up consistently and talking about the common interest. One event a week is a solid start.
4. Work on Social Basics
If you're NT-low, being ugly makes it twice as hard. You have to be deliberate about not coming off awkward. From what I've read and tried, it's about being reliable and listening more than talking.
- Starting Conversations: Keep it simple—ask about their interests first. Match their energy and don't unload your problems right away.
- Being Useful: Offer help, like sharing tips or resources. People remember that and want you around.
- Listening: Let them talk and ask questions. It makes you seem like a good guy without needing to be charismatic.
Books like "How to Win Friends" have practical advice, even if it's old. Channels that talk about loneliness for introverts helped me too—they get the blackpill side without sugarcoating.
5. Dealing with Setbacks
Rejection happens, especially if your looks are a failo. Some people will drift away, but focus on the ones who don't. If you're feeling stuck, talk to someone here or consider therapy to build resilience. It's not about fixing everything overnight; it's about small steps.
Once you have one or two connections, invite them for low-key stuff like gaming online. It grows from there.
In the end, making friends as an ugly incel isn't easy—forum threads show that. But accepting the blackpill doesn't mean giving up entirely. Focus on what you can control, and it gets better than total isolation. Share your experiences below; maybe we can help each other out.
