Have any of you managed to overcome shame

[Prøphet]

I feel a constant shame in myself that prevents me from connecting with anyone

It manifests as the feeling of some invisible force that restricts me from acting the way I really want or talking the way I want to

Like I’m banned from becoming the person I want to be, keeping me stuck as a coward I hate

I’ve grown hypersensitive to even the smallest criticism to the point where it ruins my day

For example if I get an A on an assignment but the professor has one small detail they didn’t like I feel immense guilt and hatred toward myself

I don’t even know fully why I do it but it’s something that dates back to my early childhood, even as early as 6 years old the smallest comment would shake me up

I care too much what everyone has to say

I do think my hideous looks play a big part of it, I think they damaged me at some point in my development in a way that became permanently who I am

Actually the more I meditate on this idea the more it makes sense to me

So then the only way I will ever be able to actualize myself into the man I am meant to be is fixing my face.

The question is, what to do in the mean time, where I need to go out in the world and make enough money for surgeries?

 

[futureschizo]

no I just internalize it and feel worse

 

[SomaliSub5]

yes i have,

whats done is done there is no changing what you did so theres no point in hurting yourself over something that already happened

 

[Prøphet]

yes i have,

whats done is done there is no changing what you did so theres no point in hurting yourself over something that already happened

I’m starting to feel like this, if everything I can possibly do will always be wrong in some way, it’s inevitable that I need to get over my self limiting thoughts and just start doing. How? By a radical expression of self love. But I don’t know how to love, because it was never shown to me by anyone. All I know is hatred of my self and everything connected to my self. Because my current identity, actually the identity Ive always had, is something I want nothing to do with, but rather I am forced into it by the fate of the universe. I think only self love can set me free, but I’m fighting against myself for the audacity to have any.

 

[BlackSilence]

I feel a constant shame in myself that prevents me from connecting with anyone

It manifests as the feeling of some invisible force that restricts me from acting the way I really want or talking the way I want to

Like I’m banned from becoming the person I want to be, keeping me stuck as a coward I hate

I’ve grown hypersensitive to even the smallest criticism to the point where it ruins my day

For example if I get an A on an assignment but the professor has one small detail they didn’t like I feel immense guilt and hatred toward myself

I don’t even know fully why I do it but it’s something that dates back to my early childhood, even as early as 6 years old the smallest comment would shake me up

I care too much what everyone has to say

I do think my hideous looks play a big part of it, I think they damaged me at some point in my development in a way that became permanently who I am

Actually the more I meditate on this idea the more it makes sense to me

So then the only way I will ever be able to actualize myself into the man I am meant to be is fixing my face.

The question is, what to do in the mean time, where I need to go out in the world and make enough money for surgeries?

its called avoidant personality disorder, its normal to have it

 

[Prøphet]

Growing up deformed takes a bigger toll on the soul than the body.

 

[4'11 roman]

I feel a constant shame in myself that prevents me from connecting with anyone

It manifests as the feeling of some invisible force that restricts me from acting the way I really want or talking the way I want to

Like I’m banned from becoming the person I want to be, keeping me stuck as a coward I hate

I’ve grown hypersensitive to even the smallest criticism to the point where it ruins my day

For example if I get an A on an assignment but the professor has one small detail they didn’t like I feel immense guilt and hatred toward myself

I don’t even know fully why I do it but it’s something that dates back to my early childhood, even as early as 6 years old the smallest comment would shake me up

I care too much what everyone has to say

I do think my hideous looks play a big part of it, I think they damaged me at some point in my development in a way that became permanently who I am

Actually the more I meditate on this idea the more it makes sense to me

So then the only way I will ever be able to actualize myself into the man I am meant to be is fixing my face.

The question is, what to do in the mean time, where I need to go out in the world and make enough money for surgeries?

look me in my hunter eyes

 

[Prøphet]

its called avoidant personality disorder, its normal to have it

Interesting, I will research it, but at the same time I can’t help but feel that these diagnoses are a cop out. I can label who I am with “autism”, “avoidant”, “depressed”, “fearful”, but what does it answer? How can I summarize my being, and my difficulties, with one label? Maybe even a thousand words wouldn’t be enough to learn anything about myself.

 

[SomaliSub5]

I’m starting to feel like this, if everything I can possibly do will always be wrong in some way, it’s inevitable that I need to get over my self limiting thoughts. How? By a radical expression of self love. But I don’t know how to love, because it was never shown to me by anyone. All I know is hatred of my self and everything connected to my self. Because my current identity is something I want nothing to do with, but rather I am forced into it by the fate of the universe. I think only self love can set me free, but I’m fighting against myself for the audacity to have any.

i felt the same way,

i started to have more self love the more i noticed the changes in my physicality (looksmaxxing) and I actually started to like looking at myself in the mirror

i mentally and physically became a whole new person basically, but I was still the same in a way, evolved i guess

 

[Prøphet]

i felt the same way,

i started to have more self love the more i noticed the changes in my physicality (looksmaxxing) and I actually started to like looking at myself in the mirror

i mentally and physically became a whole new person basically, but I was still the same in a way, evolved i guess

That’s my thoughts as well. I really only need 2 surgeries, strabismus alignment surgery and double jaw surgery, and my parents are helping me with the first right now. I think not being crosseyed anymore will do a lot for my self concept. I just hope it’s enough to propel me and give me the courage to pursue the money for the next procedure, DJS. I agree that Looksmaxxing is a holistic transformation of the entire being for people like us (or me at least). It’s like a form of killing my childhood demons to set myself free. I dream about how my life would look if my face was normal. I dream about never having to worry about another rude comment from a stranger, an insult to who I am.Maybe I’m just hyping it up and will be disappointed. But even then at least I’ll be in a spot where it doesn’t make me cry to look in the mirror.

 

[SomaliSub5]

That’s my thoughts as well. I really only need 2 surgeries, strabismus alignment surgery and double jaw surgery, and my parents are helping me with the first right now. I think not being crosseyed anymore will do a lot for my self concept. I just hope it’s enough to propel me and give me the courage to pursue the money for the next procedure, DJS. I agree that Looksmaxxing is a holistic transformation of the entire being for people like us (or me at least). It’s like a form of killing my childhood demons to set myself free. I dream about how my life would look if my face was normal. Maybe I’m just hyping it up and will be disappointed. But even then at least I’ll be in a spot where it doesn’t make me cry to look in the mirror.

good luck man

being content with your physical appearance is a good first step toward improving your life, especially if your mental isnt doing well

hope your surgeries go well

 

[Jesus_ist_König]

Sorry vro but dnr.

Regrading shame know that Christ will forgive u everything sin that exists, but only if u truly from the depths of ur heart mean it. If u sin and don’t even care about it then obviously it won’t be forgiven. But praying to God is high iq trust me. I will pray for you. Don’t ever forget that everyone will forgive you. Everything will pass except Christ and the kingdom of heaven.
Love u nigga imma pray for u now