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Since birth, there are two types of men:
The Good Goy
The first type is the one raised by parents to be a good goy. This person is incredibly capable and has above-average skills in everything he does. He is very intelligent but struggles to integrate into social groups, achieve success, or be seen as a man of value by women. Despite his intelligence and proper education, he often finds himself in positions within companies where he is indispensable but subordinate to less intelligent people of similar value.
The Bully
The second type is the one raised by parents to be "good," but by nature is unpleasant and domineering, always seeking to be the center of attention. These boys, referred to as "lively," take a different path in their upbringing. They may not be very intelligent, but for some reason, they manage to integrate better into social groups. Often, they surpass the good guy in their careers, even though the good guy would be WAY more intelligent than them. They have more success in social interactions and with women, which translates into a more prosperous career.
How many of you have noticed this pattern and perhaps experienced it firsthand? People who are socially adept but not very intelligent, such as managers or CEOs, often find themselves leading groups. On the other hand, there are highly intelligent individuals who are not very social, like software engineers or analysts, who occupy lower-ranking positions but are indispensable to the company.
Most interactions and relationships in our generation are superficial and brief. As a result, intelligent and deep individuals often find themselves at a disadvantage compared to those who can only show the superficial side of their image, necessary for frivolous interactions. They do not care about others but know how to sell themselves in the eyes of people.
This dynamic is confirmed by what I have observed in the growth of my nephews. I have two: one perfectly represents the good guy, while the other is more domineering. I already see in their lives the same patterns I noticed with my friends and in older generations.
I wonder if the good goy, with his qualities, will ever become a great manager or CEO, perhaps even better than the bully. Is there space for good goys? Are there ways to succeed socially, relationally, and professionally?
We are led to believe otherwise, but for these domineering boys, the path has always been downhill. Is there something missing for good goys to succeed? Have we identified what it is? If it were merely about lacking qualities, are they learnable or innate?
The Good Goy
The first type is the one raised by parents to be a good goy. This person is incredibly capable and has above-average skills in everything he does. He is very intelligent but struggles to integrate into social groups, achieve success, or be seen as a man of value by women. Despite his intelligence and proper education, he often finds himself in positions within companies where he is indispensable but subordinate to less intelligent people of similar value.
The Bully
The second type is the one raised by parents to be "good," but by nature is unpleasant and domineering, always seeking to be the center of attention. These boys, referred to as "lively," take a different path in their upbringing. They may not be very intelligent, but for some reason, they manage to integrate better into social groups. Often, they surpass the good guy in their careers, even though the good guy would be WAY more intelligent than them. They have more success in social interactions and with women, which translates into a more prosperous career.
How many of you have noticed this pattern and perhaps experienced it firsthand? People who are socially adept but not very intelligent, such as managers or CEOs, often find themselves leading groups. On the other hand, there are highly intelligent individuals who are not very social, like software engineers or analysts, who occupy lower-ranking positions but are indispensable to the company.
Most interactions and relationships in our generation are superficial and brief. As a result, intelligent and deep individuals often find themselves at a disadvantage compared to those who can only show the superficial side of their image, necessary for frivolous interactions. They do not care about others but know how to sell themselves in the eyes of people.
This dynamic is confirmed by what I have observed in the growth of my nephews. I have two: one perfectly represents the good guy, while the other is more domineering. I already see in their lives the same patterns I noticed with my friends and in older generations.
I wonder if the good goy, with his qualities, will ever become a great manager or CEO, perhaps even better than the bully. Is there space for good goys? Are there ways to succeed socially, relationally, and professionally?
We are led to believe otherwise, but for these domineering boys, the path has always been downhill. Is there something missing for good goys to succeed? Have we identified what it is? If it were merely about lacking qualities, are they learnable or innate?
