How can I improve my social skills?

[Joe_Is23]

Ive improved my looks I get attention from girls now but im getting held back by my social skills im too awkward thats how I just feel.

 

[follicel]

if ur a gooner just stop that

find something that interests u

if u meet people

dont be shy

easy fix



This post was sent from 1488

 

[Joe_Is23]

if ur a gooner just stop that

find something that interests u

if u meet people

dont be shy

easy fix



This post was sent from 1488

Yeah I need help with the gooning thing it sounds goofy but I just cant stop I genuinely do not know what to say whenever a girl tries to speak with me.

 

[follicel]

Yeah I need help with the gooning thing it sounds goofy but I just cant stop I genuinely do not know what to say whenever a girl tries to speak with me.

maybe ill make a guide to help gooners one day lol

just try not doing it at all

remove distractions

if u give in gg its over

jk not really

but girls can tell u do it 'subconsciously'

especially when you cant even form words

 

[Joe_Is23]

maybe ill make a guide to help gooners one day lol

just try not doing it at all

remove distractions

if u give in gg its over

jk not really

but girls can tell u do it 'subconsciously'

especially when you cant even form words

Should I just get a porn blocker. And thanks for the advice

 

[Wexilarious]

Just ninja openly say you need to think before saying anything, they will do everything you say since find your looks attractive

 

[Joe_Is23]

Just ninja openly say you need to think before saying anything, they will do everything you say since find your looks attractive

Bro I genuinely stutter like I get real nervous whenever I speak with a attractive girl

 

[Wexilarious]

Bro I genuinely stutter like I get real nervous whenever I speak with a attractive girl

Talk to them more and you won't feel that way with experience

 

[follicel]

think about it from a third person perspective essentially you are in your bed getting off to a screen

does that not disgust you just to even think about lol

Should I just get a porn blocker. And thanks for the advice

and yeah idk any free ones they can help but it's not easy to quit since everything is sexualized

you have to fully desexualize your brain

then you can talk to women and at least be able to 'listen' to them

gooning; no energy, nukes dopamine u just look tired and creepy

and this is just my own belief but it won't "Lower cortisol" only reason you feel sleepy or relaxed afterwards is because the main goal is to reproduce

it was made to feel good for a reason and the fake intimacy ruins it for you

 

[BexMogsYou]

Yeah I need help with the gooning thing it sounds goofy but I just cant stop I genuinely do not know what to say whenever a girl tries to speak with me.

Just speak to them about your interests or hobbies/ask them about themselves/how their days been etc... they're not any different from men in terms of basic level conversations. Even if you know nothing about their interests it just leads you to more questions and into the convo. If you feel awkward just let them speak more.

As far as the gooning thing goes. Don't get a porn blocker, its better to use free will. Like any addiction just cut down the amount you do it/occupy your brain with other things. i.e go from 1 a day to 1 every 2 days for a week etc etc. As @follicel said... you have to desexualise your brain.

 

[Joe_Is23]

Talk to them more and you won't feel that way with experience

I will im still in highschool so its much easier

 

[Joe_Is23]

think about it from a third person perspective essentially you are in your bed getting off to a screen

does that not disgust you just to even think about lol

and yeah idk any free ones they can help but it's not easy to quit since everything is sexualized

you have to fully desexualize your brain

then you can talk to women and at least be able to 'listen' to them

gooning; no energy, nukes dopamine u just look tired and creepy

and this is just my own belief but it won't "Lower cortisol" only reason you feel sleepy or relaxed afterwards is because the main goal is to reproduce

it was made to feel good for a reason and the fake intimacy ruins it for you

Yeah I will try to get busy and avoid gooning to see if that helps the longest ive gone is around 2 weeks

 

[Joe_Is23]

Just speak to them about your interests or hobbies/ask them about themselves/how their days been etc... they're not any different from men in terms of basic level conversations. Even if you know nothing about their interests it just leads you to more questions and into the convo. If you feel awkward just let them speak more.

As far as the gooning thing goes. Don't get a porn blocker, its better to use free will. Like any addiction just cut down the amount you do it/occupy your brain with other things. i.e go from 1 a day to 1 every 2 days for a week etc etc. As @follicel said... you have to desexualise your brain.

Ok I will try that

 

[SoylentChamp]

Ive improved my looks I get attention from girls now but im getting held back by my social skills im too awkward thats how I just feel.

There's two ways to become less awkward that work fairly well. One is by shaping, you want to reinforce more extroverted behaviour by reinforcing successive behaviours of what you want. You can't speak to crowds? a strategy using shaping would suggest to start giving a speach to no one, then to one person ( or a group you're comfortable with), then introduce random people to the group, and eventually give a speech to a crowd of randoms.

Second is flooding, although this can reinforce undesired behaviours. Flooding is when you rapidly expose yourself to your fear until you no longer fear it. With social contexts this can back fire because if the outcome you fear does come out, then you reinforce your awkward behaviour rather than get rid of it.


Seeing how you struggle with attractive women, talk to women you see as unattractive, and slowly shape your behaviour until you can speak normally with attractive women.

Kind of like sleeping with a night light on to stop fearing the dark.

 

[cargo70]

Ive improved my looks I get attention from girls now but im getting held back by my social skills im too awkward thats how I just feel.

The ND curse.

 

[Joe_Is23]

The ND curse.

Fr bro lmao

 

[Joe_Is23]

There's two ways to become less awkward that work fairly well. One is by shaping, you want to reinforce more extroverted behaviour by reinforcing successive behaviours of what you want. You can't speak to crowds? a strategy using shaping would suggest to start giving a speach to no one, then to one person ( or a group you're comfortable with), then introduce random people to the group, and eventually give a speech to a crowd of randoms.

Second is flooding, although this can reinforce undesired behaviours. Flooding is when you rapidly expose yourself to your fear until you no longer fear it. With social contexts this can back fire because if the outcome you fear does come out, then you reinforce your awkward behaviour rather than get rid of it.


Seeing how you struggle with attractive women, talk to women you see as unattractive, and slowly shape your behaviour until you can speak normally with attractive women.

Kind of like sleeping with a night light on to stop fearing the dark.

Thanks for the advice man I appreciated I will def implement this to see if it helps with my situation

 

[Deleted member 192671]

Ive improved my looks I get attention from girls now but im getting held back by my social skills im too awkward thats how I just feel.

do mainstream things, like watching mainstream shows/movies, go to the mall to walk, go out with your friends to eat. You're going to have more conversation the more mainstream you're.

Mark as solution

 

[Joe_Is23]

do mainstream things, like watching mainstream shows/movies, go to the mall to walk, go out with your friends to eat. You're going to have more conversation the more mainstream you're.

Mark as solution

Got it brodie

 

[andy321]

if ur a gooner just stop that

find something that interests u

if u meet people

dont be shy

easy fix



This post was sent from 1488

Is gooning why I’m so alkward talking to women and a pussy?

 

[follicel]

Is gooning why I’m so alkward talking to women and a pussy?

yes

 

[Outlander]

 

[Joe_Is23]

View attachment 4546215

I figured