Sloppyseconds
Onlysloppy2nds4u
- Joined
- May 24, 2020
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Intro
Shoutout to @emeraldglass for prompting me to write this thread after he broke my profile’s hymen to ask why I basically never posted this whole time since 2020. Although he seems to have gone MIA ever since. Looks like I got pumped n dumped and @greycel got his sloppy seconds. I made this account during COVID towards the end of my teenage years, where I was then stuck in a “bluepill-blackpill” tug-of-war until last year. Upon my return two months ago, at one point I literally had 4 posts after 4 years. Initially I wanted to write a standard-sized thread but later chose to write a megathread and “compilation”. Due to how long this thread is, there is no expectation for this to be read in one go, or at all in fact. Trimmed a shit ton already and it's still long asf. Oh well.
Obviously how we got “blackpilled” won’t be the same, whether it would be from a hookup, LTR, friendship, or maybe just something as simple as a girl calling you “ugly” in elementary school. The last time I was in an actual LTR was with a girl I knew from high school. Eventually she told me she wasn’t a virgin and that I was her second. Upon hearing that, I had a bit of an existential crisis, realizing that every sex act I would do with her would be compared to her first. When you’re second, you’ll be placed in a 1v1 scenario against a girl’s first still fresh in her mind. I couldn’t imagine spending a lifetime playing second fiddle, and this thought would gradually eat me from the inside. This mindset didn’t just apply to sex but also lot of other competitive and academic aspects of life. I’m not the only one who had such sentiment since athletes in the Olympics tend to be less happy placing second than third. It’s basically like life and death. So not long after I had no choice but to end things with her amicably. Although I never actually told her the real reason why. The concept of female virginity was probably one of the first blackpills I had to swallow years before I even discovered this site.
Basically all posts on cuckeddit about their gf not being a virgin are gonna get downvoted to oblivion and they’ll just tell you to “get over it”. So not that long after, I discovered Looksmax and made this account “Sloppyseconds”, although I didn’t post anything serious until just two months ago. If I hadn’t ended things with her, perhaps I’d still be in a LTR today. I would probably be one of the many who cuckedditors like to refer to as “happily in a relationship” and a “normal” person. Cuz y’know they love to say that average-looking are in relationships all the time and that you “incels” are wrong about chad existing. Well yeah sure if you drop all your standards. I’m not sure about being in a “happy” relationship though. I’d rather be alone than suffer just to appear “normal”. At this point in my life, the blackpill to me is what 50 Shades of Grey is to women. Looksmax didn't blackpill me, reality did. The content itself is probably water but I still wanted to write about it anyways.
Now onto the thread itself:
(Had to add spoilers to make the thread look shorter than it actually is JFL)
How I "fumbled" a virgin girl
Girl I met in college
I befriended a girl during my college years (big mistake JFL) who was ethnic and came from a Muslim populated country (although mentioned nothing about her faith), usually dressed like a basic white girl and was really shy and had social anxiety. We talked to each other for over two years until things went astray which led to me being truly blackpilled.
My identity back then revolved around being a “doomer” and feeling sad all the time. This was shortly after I cut out my childhood friend I had known since elementary school because I realized he was being a controlling prick trying to micromanage the way I live. This might’ve captivated her at first since she saw me as someone she could “relate” to. She came into my life during a time where I tried cutting ties with my old social circle and wanted a fresh start. Even though I often saw her hanging out with my college social circle then, she wasn’t noteworthy enough to catch my attention since she was really quiet and not exactly a stunner, to say the least.
Back then I was quite emotionally expressive in front of her and told her how I often felt behind in life because of circumstances out of my control. Yet this girl gave me lot of attention despite me having basically nothing to offer and let me vent a lot to her. She told me that she had social anxiety and was a complete loner back in high school with no one to talk to and that I was basically someone who filled the void for her. In retrospect, this was the earliest “red flag” from her cause it’s been said many times that you cannot fix a broken bitch and you’ll only end up hurting yourself. It might’ve been an elaborate plan of hers to convert me into a long-term orbiter of hers. Other people in my social circle started noticing us talking together a lot and started shipping us together since they thought we would make a good “depressed” couple. Although I brushed it off since I wasn’t into her back then.
Call me a “terrible” person all you want, but most of the physical attraction I felt towards her was because she said that she was a “virgin by choice” when we were studying and “shit-talking” each other about who’s a virgin. That was when I gradually started developing more attachment towards her, although I pretended that it wasn’t a big deal. For me, virginity in a woman is such a massive halo that it could boost a becky up to borderline stacy in my eyes. She was just over 18, and at that age most girls in the west would’ve already racked up massive bodycounts. Although, it must’ve been common to be virgin at that age back in her country. Knowing that she is a virgin “by choice”, it was very likely she was waiting till marriage given her background. Even though I wasn’t a big fan of having to wait till marriage due to our cultural differences, I still felt like “respecting” her boundaries and decided to play it safe and not aggressively flirt or anything. Perhaps too safe to the point where I had to actively suppress the feelings I had for her by never initiating interactions with her. Although she often initiated and made it so much more difficult. As such, I developed a scarcity mindset towards this girl, and that was probably the beginning of my downfall.
My identity back then revolved around being a “doomer” and feeling sad all the time. This was shortly after I cut out my childhood friend I had known since elementary school because I realized he was being a controlling prick trying to micromanage the way I live. This might’ve captivated her at first since she saw me as someone she could “relate” to. She came into my life during a time where I tried cutting ties with my old social circle and wanted a fresh start. Even though I often saw her hanging out with my college social circle then, she wasn’t noteworthy enough to catch my attention since she was really quiet and not exactly a stunner, to say the least.
Back then I was quite emotionally expressive in front of her and told her how I often felt behind in life because of circumstances out of my control. Yet this girl gave me lot of attention despite me having basically nothing to offer and let me vent a lot to her. She told me that she had social anxiety and was a complete loner back in high school with no one to talk to and that I was basically someone who filled the void for her. In retrospect, this was the earliest “red flag” from her cause it’s been said many times that you cannot fix a broken bitch and you’ll only end up hurting yourself. It might’ve been an elaborate plan of hers to convert me into a long-term orbiter of hers. Other people in my social circle started noticing us talking together a lot and started shipping us together since they thought we would make a good “depressed” couple. Although I brushed it off since I wasn’t into her back then.
Call me a “terrible” person all you want, but most of the physical attraction I felt towards her was because she said that she was a “virgin by choice” when we were studying and “shit-talking” each other about who’s a virgin. That was when I gradually started developing more attachment towards her, although I pretended that it wasn’t a big deal. For me, virginity in a woman is such a massive halo that it could boost a becky up to borderline stacy in my eyes. She was just over 18, and at that age most girls in the west would’ve already racked up massive bodycounts. Although, it must’ve been common to be virgin at that age back in her country. Knowing that she is a virgin “by choice”, it was very likely she was waiting till marriage given her background. Even though I wasn’t a big fan of having to wait till marriage due to our cultural differences, I still felt like “respecting” her boundaries and decided to play it safe and not aggressively flirt or anything. Perhaps too safe to the point where I had to actively suppress the feelings I had for her by never initiating interactions with her. Although she often initiated and made it so much more difficult. As such, I developed a scarcity mindset towards this girl, and that was probably the beginning of my downfall.
As time went by and we bonded more, she even bought me food when we were studying together. For some reason I found it quite heartwarming when she nagged me to study when I got lazy. It’s like she had a sense of obligation towards me even though we were friends at most. Those small details really stuck out to me. She also introduced me to several new foods like boba tea. Though it was kinda weird though because boba tea had these big black balls which I thought was kinda ghey to have in your mouth. Glazed donuts and cinnamon rolls were also her favourite foods, which I think was kinda sus. Perhaps it’s just my dirty mind but her favourite foods seemed like sexual innuendos since they looked like foods that someone jizzed on. So I thought she might’ve been deliberately messing with my head. Although it turns out she was quite dirty-minded too. On the Discord server we were both on, one day I was using the bot to spam NSFW pics on a hidden channel. All of a sudden she figured out how to get access to this channel and caught me posting gifs of tits. I thought “GG”, but she then said “You think I’m innocent?” and then started spamming yaoi. Weird moment.
One day she asked when my birthday was, which confused me at first but didn’t question it and told her anyway. On my birthday that year, she texted me a birthday card she made with Photoshop, which included some inside jokes we shared. I pretended to be nonchalant about it and simply said “thanks a lot”, but it actually made me feel quite emotional. It was quite a sight to behold since not even my friends I knew since elementary were that impassioned about these matters. Although you can argue that guys sending birthday cards to each other is “ghey AF” and is more of a girly thing.
I didn’t return the favour the first time around and was even a few days late in wishing her happy birthday since I forgot about it JFL. Despite that, she sent me another birthday drawing on my next birthday, once again exactly at midnight. This made me feel guilty, and I wanted to make up for it for her upcoming birthday. So I had to return the favour and created a birthday GIF for her. Although I didn’t send it exactly at midnight to avoid looking obsessive. When I sent it, I saw notifications of her texts where it was all caps, which kinda scared me at first. She told me that I didn’t know how happy I made her feel as if no one had ever done something like this for her. Unfortunately, it started going downhill as I struggled to fight the feelings I had for her, and not to mention I was about to graduate soon too (since I was a year older than her), and therefore meant we would likely not be hanging out together IRL.
One day she asked when my birthday was, which confused me at first but didn’t question it and told her anyway. On my birthday that year, she texted me a birthday card she made with Photoshop, which included some inside jokes we shared. I pretended to be nonchalant about it and simply said “thanks a lot”, but it actually made me feel quite emotional. It was quite a sight to behold since not even my friends I knew since elementary were that impassioned about these matters. Although you can argue that guys sending birthday cards to each other is “ghey AF” and is more of a girly thing.
I didn’t return the favour the first time around and was even a few days late in wishing her happy birthday since I forgot about it JFL. Despite that, she sent me another birthday drawing on my next birthday, once again exactly at midnight. This made me feel guilty, and I wanted to make up for it for her upcoming birthday. So I had to return the favour and created a birthday GIF for her. Although I didn’t send it exactly at midnight to avoid looking obsessive. When I sent it, I saw notifications of her texts where it was all caps, which kinda scared me at first. She told me that I didn’t know how happy I made her feel as if no one had ever done something like this for her. Unfortunately, it started going downhill as I struggled to fight the feelings I had for her, and not to mention I was about to graduate soon too (since I was a year older than her), and therefore meant we would likely not be hanging out together IRL.
When I was about to graduate college, I planned on abstaining from using Discord to focus my energies on career and hobbymaxxing (absolutely terrible choice in retrospect since it weakened any connections I had with people I met in college). She sounded increasingly desperate around me and one day DMed me, venting about how no one seemed to take notice of her and asked me if I thought she was an asshole. I told her “no”, how could she be an asshole? Up to this point, she gave me the impression that she was someone who wouldn’t even hurt a fly. Apparently the whole point of her DMing me was to keep in contact with me on Discord since she said she would no longer have anyone to relate to and that we’re both “introverts”. Perhaps this innocence about her appealed to my protective instincts and why I was open to continue using Discord just to chat with her.
After I graduated, she would initiate DMs quite often, making it feel like I wasn’t putting in effort to reel her in and thus making it feel less cucked. It did seem like she was using me to vent from then onwards, in particular about her stressed about college assignments. She also mentioned this one asian 4chan guy in our social circle “bullying” her JFL (I will bring this asian guy up again as he played a pivotal part in blackpilling me).
Maybe because she showed compassion towards me when all I did was vent about my struggles and nothing else back then, I felt a great deal of responsibility and moral obligation to repay the favour as cucked as it sounds. Since my communication with the girl became long-distance, it may have contributed to the gradual decline in our bond and a testament to the proximitypill. Post-college life can be fucking brutal.
Later I told her that I was planning on starting on a Youtube channel. Although, I wanted to keep it a secret to not put pressure on myself in case it did not turn out as good as I envisioned. In retrospect, my choice of keeping things a secret might’ve backfired since it made me look like an anxious tryhard and the opposite of a natural.
More cracks started to show when I was more open with my personal beliefs and that might’ve contributed to weakening the bond between us. Despite her trad background, she was someone who was trying to integrate with western liberal ideologies unyieldingly and showed boundless tolerance for degenerate behaviour like women hoeing around. I remember talking shit about another girl within our social circle being a hoe since all she talks about is her hookups. She got mad at me for a few hours and excused the other girl’s behaviour and said “she might be a hoe but she’s a nice person”. Looks like just being “nice” is a flex-tape for being a degenerate huh. At first, she gave me the impression of someone with strong beliefs and traditions such as respect for elders and self-discipline as she supposedly said she wanted to be “the best version of herself”. But just like “liberated” women in the west often are, this tends to be lip-service. She also talks a lot about practising “social skills”, which I don’t really think is something that you can actively hone (especially as a woman) and is mostly about being aware of the concept of “overton window”, where it’s about suppressing your personal beliefs and avoiding being politically incorrect.
After I graduated, she would initiate DMs quite often, making it feel like I wasn’t putting in effort to reel her in and thus making it feel less cucked. It did seem like she was using me to vent from then onwards, in particular about her stressed about college assignments. She also mentioned this one asian 4chan guy in our social circle “bullying” her JFL (I will bring this asian guy up again as he played a pivotal part in blackpilling me).
Maybe because she showed compassion towards me when all I did was vent about my struggles and nothing else back then, I felt a great deal of responsibility and moral obligation to repay the favour as cucked as it sounds. Since my communication with the girl became long-distance, it may have contributed to the gradual decline in our bond and a testament to the proximitypill. Post-college life can be fucking brutal.
Later I told her that I was planning on starting on a Youtube channel. Although, I wanted to keep it a secret to not put pressure on myself in case it did not turn out as good as I envisioned. In retrospect, my choice of keeping things a secret might’ve backfired since it made me look like an anxious tryhard and the opposite of a natural.
More cracks started to show when I was more open with my personal beliefs and that might’ve contributed to weakening the bond between us. Despite her trad background, she was someone who was trying to integrate with western liberal ideologies unyieldingly and showed boundless tolerance for degenerate behaviour like women hoeing around. I remember talking shit about another girl within our social circle being a hoe since all she talks about is her hookups. She got mad at me for a few hours and excused the other girl’s behaviour and said “she might be a hoe but she’s a nice person”. Looks like just being “nice” is a flex-tape for being a degenerate huh. At first, she gave me the impression of someone with strong beliefs and traditions such as respect for elders and self-discipline as she supposedly said she wanted to be “the best version of herself”. But just like “liberated” women in the west often are, this tends to be lip-service. She also talks a lot about practising “social skills”, which I don’t really think is something that you can actively hone (especially as a woman) and is mostly about being aware of the concept of “overton window”, where it’s about suppressing your personal beliefs and avoiding being politically incorrect.
Since our texting became more emotionally heated, my feelings towards her quickly got to the point where I just couldn’t hold it in any longer. I felt like this was my only chance to land a virgin girl and perhaps got overly desperate. Knowing that this could end our friendship, I was willing to take the risk and decided to write up a confession to her just to relieve my inner turmoil and not expect us to date or anything. In fact, I fully prepared myself for her to just ghost/block me afterwards. Surprisingly when I sent her the confession, I actually felt a great sense of contentment regardless of how she would respond. And to my surprise she didn’t block me like many basic white bitches would and actually wrote something in return as well, telling me that it’s her first time writing a letter to someone. Strangely enough, she “thanked” me for liking her. But as expected, she said that in all honesty she thought we weren’t a good match at the moment, but still thought of me as a great friend and told me I’m brave for sharing my feelings with her. She said that the reason I caught her attention was because she wanted to be friends with someone who feels the same way about life as she does and to feel less lonely. She said that there’s nothing wrong with helping each other. In addition, she said she wanted me to understand that not everything is bad as it seems and that life gets better. Towards the end, she said she prefers to continue to be friends.
As cucked as it sounds, I actually didn’t mind since we were both emotionally supporting each other this whole time and not like I was the only one initiating in DMs. I suggested that we both take a small break from talking to one another. When we both finally cooled down, things went back to normal, although I consciously decided to lessen my texts with her to avoid stifling her and to ease any tensions we both had.
As cucked as it sounds, I actually didn’t mind since we were both emotionally supporting each other this whole time and not like I was the only one initiating in DMs. I suggested that we both take a small break from talking to one another. When we both finally cooled down, things went back to normal, although I consciously decided to lessen my texts with her to avoid stifling her and to ease any tensions we both had.
Fast forward over a month later, rather than the confession itself, I think the pivotal moment that ended the “friendship” was that one evening I asked her if I was allowed to vent about my insecurities. At this point, I know that I was pretty much friendzoned and I thought the most important thing at this point was to find out the truth about what she really thinks about me. I felt I had nothing to lose at this point. Basically I went in knowing this would end up with her ghosting/blocking me all for the sake of confirming the blackpill. She allowed me and so for the next two hours, I went on a Looksmax-eqsue vent and talked about my own insecurities about my physical appearance like height and face, telling her that I wore shoe lifts etc. For reference I am a 6’0 MTN who’s carried by soft features and harmony since I lack bones. I basically look like the “average man” morph, high-trust yet no striking features. Hence I fraud a bit by having hair on the longer side. At first, it seemed like she was open-minded and acted nonchalant about it, “Eh women wear makeup and heels so I can’t complain about men wearing shoe lifts. Men can do what they what if it makes them feel confident”. I felt a bit relieved, yet I wasn’t fully convinced either, thinking that it was too good to be true. Her vibe seemed off since she was acting more stoic than she usually was.
Two weeks later, I decided to finally reveal my Youtube channel to her where she was my first subscriber. I talked about how my neighbours prevented me from creating content earlier. This was because my neighbours went to work in vans/trucks and their schedule coincidentally matched with mine. So the only time where I had time to record content was when my neighbours also arrived home at the same time and they would basically leave their engines on for fuck knows how long. Not only that but they would be working on some machinery and shit with their garage open for the entire evening. I never bothered checking out what they were actually up to and I didn’t give a fuck. Instead I was just seething at them the whole time for being so loud. It was only just recently that I got some bit of soundproofing to block out some of the noise to an acceptable standard. She told me that I shouldn’t always “blame” others, even though it’s not really “blaming” but more of me venting and expressing how I really feel. Besdies isn’t it just human nature to feel suffocated and be in pain from being unable to pursue our passions? The only way where I wasn’t to “blame” my neighbours was to suppress all that pain and drive myself into mental insanity instead. I was expecting her to be happy or proud when I showed her my channel, but she sounded rather depressed saying stuff like “Looks like you don’t need my help after all. What do I even know right?”. Afterwards, I tried to cheer her up and told her that I always appreciated her emotional support and that’s all I need from her. I thought everything was fine and that we’d reached a new level of understanding with each other, but I couldn’t be more wrong.
The next morning I got some text notifications, thinking it would be another day talking to her. Turns out it was a goodbye message saying it was nice meeting me and hoped that I get everything I want out of life. I froze in shock and immediately felt asphyxiated which led me to go outside to get some air. I then tried replying to her but turns out she blocked me. Strangely enough, she was still subbed to my Youtube channel since it was still the same number as yesterday and didn’t see any loss in subs. Despite feeling pain, as much as I tried to make myself cry, I couldn’t. Perhaps I’ve already subconsciously accepted that this would eventually happen, yet simultaneously cannot process it properly when it finally happened. For the next two weeks, my sex drive pretty much disappeared and could only focus my energies on careermaxxing and my channel.
Later I noticed that on her Discord profile description saying that she was going to delete her account, even she had been using the account for over 4 years. I noticed that I also lost a sub on my channel about the same time she deactivated her account. This made me think it must’ve had something to do with me. But why? What did I do so terribly wrong for her to make this choice to delete her account? It's like some BPD shit from her.
Two weeks later, I decided to finally reveal my Youtube channel to her where she was my first subscriber. I talked about how my neighbours prevented me from creating content earlier. This was because my neighbours went to work in vans/trucks and their schedule coincidentally matched with mine. So the only time where I had time to record content was when my neighbours also arrived home at the same time and they would basically leave their engines on for fuck knows how long. Not only that but they would be working on some machinery and shit with their garage open for the entire evening. I never bothered checking out what they were actually up to and I didn’t give a fuck. Instead I was just seething at them the whole time for being so loud. It was only just recently that I got some bit of soundproofing to block out some of the noise to an acceptable standard. She told me that I shouldn’t always “blame” others, even though it’s not really “blaming” but more of me venting and expressing how I really feel. Besdies isn’t it just human nature to feel suffocated and be in pain from being unable to pursue our passions? The only way where I wasn’t to “blame” my neighbours was to suppress all that pain and drive myself into mental insanity instead. I was expecting her to be happy or proud when I showed her my channel, but she sounded rather depressed saying stuff like “Looks like you don’t need my help after all. What do I even know right?”. Afterwards, I tried to cheer her up and told her that I always appreciated her emotional support and that’s all I need from her. I thought everything was fine and that we’d reached a new level of understanding with each other, but I couldn’t be more wrong.
The next morning I got some text notifications, thinking it would be another day talking to her. Turns out it was a goodbye message saying it was nice meeting me and hoped that I get everything I want out of life. I froze in shock and immediately felt asphyxiated which led me to go outside to get some air. I then tried replying to her but turns out she blocked me. Strangely enough, she was still subbed to my Youtube channel since it was still the same number as yesterday and didn’t see any loss in subs. Despite feeling pain, as much as I tried to make myself cry, I couldn’t. Perhaps I’ve already subconsciously accepted that this would eventually happen, yet simultaneously cannot process it properly when it finally happened. For the next two weeks, my sex drive pretty much disappeared and could only focus my energies on careermaxxing and my channel.
Later I noticed that on her Discord profile description saying that she was going to delete her account, even she had been using the account for over 4 years. I noticed that I also lost a sub on my channel about the same time she deactivated her account. This made me think it must’ve had something to do with me. But why? What did I do so terribly wrong for her to make this choice to delete her account? It's like some BPD shit from her.
I asked people I knew back in college if they know why the girl deleted her account, but no one seems to know either. Fast-forward two months, one of them told me that she had returned with a new account and is back on Discord. I asked the guys if it was okay if I rejoined the server, and they allowed me but said she will be keeping some distance from me. When I rejoined the server, her behaviour somewhat signalled to me that she abandoned her old self out of sheer spite. Apparently she started playing League of Legends everyday ever since she deleted her old Discord account.
First thing I noticed was that she was already talking to that asian 4chan guy who she mentioned was treating her like shit. This guy was 5’11 and had a face that was flat as a cloth iron and wore glasses. But he made up for it by being insanely low-inhib and was unlike any other stereotypical asian who you would think of as hardworking and conformist. He even posted a pic of himself on the server in a maid outfit and cat ears posing in front of a mirror. Turns out they were playing League together and despite the abusive dynamic between them, I even saw her beg the guy to play with her. The strange thing was that the guy often screenshotted their chats in-game and sent them on the server as if they were trying to get a reaction out of me. Yet the asian guy was actually quite mild-mannered towards me even though I was trying to be sarcastic and threw subtle shade at him.
One day the guy literally typed in-game to her “I am rock solid for you” since he chose to play Malphite. I expected her to leave the game or something or block him. But nope she reacted with “omg *blush emoji*. Every sex joke the asian guy was making towards her, she reacted like it was the funniest ever. At that point, I thought “GG they’re already fucking”. Even more shocking was she had no problem with the guy talking about cumming in her mom’s mouth. I was expecting her to block him and that would be the end of it. But she just sounded surprised and acted like it was no big deal. Turns out she thinks her mom being sexualised and degraded by him is forgivable and “funny”, yet me wanting to have an honest conversation with her was not. If being cucked had “post-game stats” that show who you got cucked by and their avatar, for me it would show a 5’11 asian guy with glasses and face flat as a cloth iron posing in front of a mirror in a maid outfit and cat ears. Ironically I’d be more accepting of the outcome had it been a 6’5 gigachad. But instead I got cucked by someone I mogged and I couldn't do anything but simply watch with my mouth agape.
And just like that, the innocent “trad” girl that I once knew slowly transformed into another basic white bitch. They allow themselves to be sexually objectified without setting any boundaries and only complain when it doesn’t benefit them anymore. It’s like the term "Schrodinger's Feminism" where a woman is simultaneously empowered and oppressed. Whether they are empowered or oppressed simply depends on their mood on a particular day rather than the actual reality of the situation. Since that girl is desperate for male attention, any comment towards her is empowering regardless of how degrading it is. And in that moment it happened to be that asian guy who she vented to me about him treating her like shit. Perhaps that guy was someone she saw as an emotional rebound and craved attention from any man whether good or bad. From then onwards, I concluded that all of her talk about “respect” and other traditional values are lies and lip service to make herself seem more dignified than she really is. Her ending things with me and then deleting her old Discord account really unleashed her inner whore.
First thing I noticed was that she was already talking to that asian 4chan guy who she mentioned was treating her like shit. This guy was 5’11 and had a face that was flat as a cloth iron and wore glasses. But he made up for it by being insanely low-inhib and was unlike any other stereotypical asian who you would think of as hardworking and conformist. He even posted a pic of himself on the server in a maid outfit and cat ears posing in front of a mirror. Turns out they were playing League together and despite the abusive dynamic between them, I even saw her beg the guy to play with her. The strange thing was that the guy often screenshotted their chats in-game and sent them on the server as if they were trying to get a reaction out of me. Yet the asian guy was actually quite mild-mannered towards me even though I was trying to be sarcastic and threw subtle shade at him.
One day the guy literally typed in-game to her “I am rock solid for you” since he chose to play Malphite. I expected her to leave the game or something or block him. But nope she reacted with “omg *blush emoji*. Every sex joke the asian guy was making towards her, she reacted like it was the funniest ever. At that point, I thought “GG they’re already fucking”. Even more shocking was she had no problem with the guy talking about cumming in her mom’s mouth. I was expecting her to block him and that would be the end of it. But she just sounded surprised and acted like it was no big deal. Turns out she thinks her mom being sexualised and degraded by him is forgivable and “funny”, yet me wanting to have an honest conversation with her was not. If being cucked had “post-game stats” that show who you got cucked by and their avatar, for me it would show a 5’11 asian guy with glasses and face flat as a cloth iron posing in front of a mirror in a maid outfit and cat ears. Ironically I’d be more accepting of the outcome had it been a 6’5 gigachad. But instead I got cucked by someone I mogged and I couldn't do anything but simply watch with my mouth agape.
And just like that, the innocent “trad” girl that I once knew slowly transformed into another basic white bitch. They allow themselves to be sexually objectified without setting any boundaries and only complain when it doesn’t benefit them anymore. It’s like the term "Schrodinger's Feminism" where a woman is simultaneously empowered and oppressed. Whether they are empowered or oppressed simply depends on their mood on a particular day rather than the actual reality of the situation. Since that girl is desperate for male attention, any comment towards her is empowering regardless of how degrading it is. And in that moment it happened to be that asian guy who she vented to me about him treating her like shit. Perhaps that guy was someone she saw as an emotional rebound and craved attention from any man whether good or bad. From then onwards, I concluded that all of her talk about “respect” and other traditional values are lies and lip service to make herself seem more dignified than she really is. Her ending things with me and then deleting her old Discord account really unleashed her inner whore.
After being psychologically tortured for the next two weeks (a positon I placed myself into like a cuck), I decided I had enough and chose to DM her to ask why she ended things with me, even though I know she’s a mod on that server and could easily ban me. Yet I also offered her an option to decline and that I would only ask once. At first, the message didn’t go through since she was only accepting DMs from friends. So I asked one of the other guys on the server to pass my message onto her. To my surprise she actually messaged me, asking me what I want to know, although stating that it’ll be our final convo. Despite that, I felt slightly happy again even though I really shouldn’t be. She told me the reason why she left was I always vented to her and treated like a “therapist” and not a human being and therefore got “scared” of me. But apparently that asian guy sexualising you and your mom is treating you like a “human” now? And you’re not “scared” of him? Apparently she was “done” with me long ago but decided to wait till I revealed my Youtube channel to her. Me “blaming” my neighbours was apparently her last straw and the moment she decided to leave me.
I mean if she was already planning on leaving me long ago, regardless of what I said on our last day, then it meant I had zero control over whether this friendship would survive or not. She could’ve at least set a boundary and told me “I don’t feel respected in our friendship. I would appreciate it if you spent more time chillin instead of venting to me”. But even typing this one simple sentence would’ve been life and death for her. Perhaps she feels a sense of moral superiority by tolerating me instead of confronting me directly. Her “tolerance” basically implied “Go to hell. I don’t bother with you. Our friendship never meant much in the first place unless I get everything I want out of it”.
She then said to me that I didn’t really like her and only liked the "idea" of her. I thought to myself “What the fuck do you even mean bitch? I spent all this time opening up to you because I trusted you and wanted to get closer with you. Yet you have the gall to say that I don’t like you and didn’t treat you like a human being? I thought you women like being loved for your personality and not for your body”. As much as I wanted to smash my computer and put my entire being into insulting her afterwards, I instead decided to be as polite and reasonable as I could and thanked her instead for letting me talk to her one last time. In that way, I didn’t get banned by her and still was able to leave the server on my own terms and with the last remnants of my dignity. In the end, it looked like I was just the first stepping stone for her towards chad, and hopefully that asian 4chan guy was just another stepping stone as well. I wasn’t entirely sure whether or not they actually got together. But I wasn’t going to cuck myself even further by overstaying and seeing things till the end.
A year after the “break-up”, I think I have “healed” enough to write objectively about this. Even though I graduated college already, I’m still on some Discord servers there, perhaps subconsciously holding onto what could’ve been. Although I know I won’t be able to return without looking creepy, my only option is to lurk. Had this girl not given me psuedochad treatment early on and wasn’t a virgin, I wouldn’t even be writing this thread and she’d be just be another thot to me. Ironically the blackpill played a huge role in "healing" me, and after embracing the blackpill, I feel more content than I've ever been.
I mean if she was already planning on leaving me long ago, regardless of what I said on our last day, then it meant I had zero control over whether this friendship would survive or not. She could’ve at least set a boundary and told me “I don’t feel respected in our friendship. I would appreciate it if you spent more time chillin instead of venting to me”. But even typing this one simple sentence would’ve been life and death for her. Perhaps she feels a sense of moral superiority by tolerating me instead of confronting me directly. Her “tolerance” basically implied “Go to hell. I don’t bother with you. Our friendship never meant much in the first place unless I get everything I want out of it”.
She then said to me that I didn’t really like her and only liked the "idea" of her. I thought to myself “What the fuck do you even mean bitch? I spent all this time opening up to you because I trusted you and wanted to get closer with you. Yet you have the gall to say that I don’t like you and didn’t treat you like a human being? I thought you women like being loved for your personality and not for your body”. As much as I wanted to smash my computer and put my entire being into insulting her afterwards, I instead decided to be as polite and reasonable as I could and thanked her instead for letting me talk to her one last time. In that way, I didn’t get banned by her and still was able to leave the server on my own terms and with the last remnants of my dignity. In the end, it looked like I was just the first stepping stone for her towards chad, and hopefully that asian 4chan guy was just another stepping stone as well. I wasn’t entirely sure whether or not they actually got together. But I wasn’t going to cuck myself even further by overstaying and seeing things till the end.
A year after the “break-up”, I think I have “healed” enough to write objectively about this. Even though I graduated college already, I’m still on some Discord servers there, perhaps subconsciously holding onto what could’ve been. Although I know I won’t be able to return without looking creepy, my only option is to lurk. Had this girl not given me psuedochad treatment early on and wasn’t a virgin, I wouldn’t even be writing this thread and she’d be just be another thot to me. Ironically the blackpill played a huge role in "healing" me, and after embracing the blackpill, I feel more content than I've ever been.
If you don't think that a virgin woman is generally a better candidate for a wife all things equal (Just Be First), then I don’t think you will be able to relate to the overall sentiment of this thread. Though some might also say “Well your experience kinda disproves “Just Be First” (JBF) cuz look how how mentally ill she was!!”. First of all, I never slept with this girl so "JBF" was never put to test. Secondly, it’s cope to think that fucking thots is an alternative to a virgin girl because they think women having more sexual experience somehow means “healthier mental”. Just because there's no guarantee doesn't mean we should settle. Some might say I have a “virginity fetish”, but that’s a weak and lazy argument. Just like how cuckedditors like to think that wanting to settle down with a non-virgin high body count woman is a sign of “mental maturity”. Yet if I was only allowed to write one thread on this site, it would be this one down below. That is perhaps my most controversial thread (sadly):
The significance of the “Just Be First (JBF)” theory
Intro Before the advent of fame, glory, arts and culture, a man that lived in prehistoric times only had two circumstances where they could immortalise themselves. First is by being the one to take a woman's virginity and imprint themselves on their sexual psyche (not just psychologically but...
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Blackpills I embraced from this experience
Opening up to a woman to bond with her is cope
A big mistake I made was seeing that girl as a “comrade”, someone that I struggle with, confide in with when things get really tough, instead of someone to have fun and enjoy life with. Maybe that’s why Nietzsche said “The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything”. It’s a great pity we cannot really share our deepest emotions with women without them storing them somewhere and using it against us at a later point in time. It seems the only true “comrades” we can make are with other men.
Women generally don’t seem to understand the meaning of sacrifice and appreciating men for their virtues, only what they can extract out of us. They don’t realize that they have to make their own sacrifices too if they really value a relationship. Sometimes, the only “sacrifice” they have to make is to be honest to the man and tell him that he is starting to stifle her etc. Yet they’d rather have the man bear the burden of having to read her mind and just “know” what’s wrong in every twist and turn. They expect men to do all the work, and have us meet them in their “comfort zone” rather than at the midpoint.
Hence why for that girl even one sentence of her asserting boundaries and making some changes to our “friendship” is like life and death for her. I am somewhat lucky that I still had some friends I knew from high school that I could reach out to and vent about what happened between that girl and I. Having 2-3 people that you can open up to without them thinking less of you afterwards mogs having hundreds of “friends” that you got from jestermaxxing. Platonic love co-existing with erotic love really seems like a legendary myth. Back then I still naively believed in platonic love between a man and woman despite already being exposed to blackpill content. Can’t believe I doubted Plato when he said that woman cannot experience “heavenly love”. That girl only seemed to be “friends” with me opportunistically as she saw me as merely someone to relate to feel less “lonely”. Me going through the same struggles as she did was her “therapy”, and it seemed that when things started getting better for me, she stopped relating to me. She couldn’t feel happy for me trying to “ascend” in life that my guy friends would.
Women generally don’t seem to understand the meaning of sacrifice and appreciating men for their virtues, only what they can extract out of us. They don’t realize that they have to make their own sacrifices too if they really value a relationship. Sometimes, the only “sacrifice” they have to make is to be honest to the man and tell him that he is starting to stifle her etc. Yet they’d rather have the man bear the burden of having to read her mind and just “know” what’s wrong in every twist and turn. They expect men to do all the work, and have us meet them in their “comfort zone” rather than at the midpoint.
Hence why for that girl even one sentence of her asserting boundaries and making some changes to our “friendship” is like life and death for her. I am somewhat lucky that I still had some friends I knew from high school that I could reach out to and vent about what happened between that girl and I. Having 2-3 people that you can open up to without them thinking less of you afterwards mogs having hundreds of “friends” that you got from jestermaxxing. Platonic love co-existing with erotic love really seems like a legendary myth. Back then I still naively believed in platonic love between a man and woman despite already being exposed to blackpill content. Can’t believe I doubted Plato when he said that woman cannot experience “heavenly love”. That girl only seemed to be “friends” with me opportunistically as she saw me as merely someone to relate to feel less “lonely”. Me going through the same struggles as she did was her “therapy”, and it seemed that when things started getting better for me, she stopped relating to me. She couldn’t feel happy for me trying to “ascend” in life that my guy friends would.
Relevant threads:
Would you stop being “misogynistic” if women had the same rational capabilities as men?
Had a random convo with a woman and she started ranting about her workplace environment. What really got me thinking was when she said “guys opinions are taken more seriously compared to women ”. I didn’t say this out loud but immediately I thought “well yeah bitch look at how young women are...
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The mistake in trying to career and hobbymax
I may have also been cucked by this redpill bullshit of focusing on career and hobbymaxxing so that I develop a scarcity mindset or emotional self-reliance. Although a scarcity mindset is invaluable in most situations with women, I might’ve overdid it to the point where every time the girl wanted to play games with me, I declined and said I was too busy JFL. On top of the proximitypill, that might’ve led her to seek attention elsewhere, and that asian guy was the most convenient option, even if he was mistreating her.
It didn’t help that I was too candid about my anxiety in starting a Youtube channel, trying to get it to be perfect, which is just the opposite of effortless action. If I had told her that I was running a channel the whole time and acted like it was just part of my identity, instead of a huge project, it might’ve had less of an emotional impact on her. Although it would’ve meant she wouldn’t have tried to get closer to me in the first place since being a content creator would’ve shown that I had a degree of emotional self-reliance.
I think a lot of men including myself made the mistake of assuming that women have no ego and are gentle and compassionate beings (Women-are-wonderful effect). Women have egos too even if it’s not through accomplishments. No one really talks about this, but people can also derive their self-esteem from how much they are able to help people, how others depend on them, yet secretly expect something in return. It’s like MrBeast who’s supposedly the most “generous man in the world”. But I don’t think he’d be doing any philanthropy if there wasn't any money and fame in it.
She never seemed to be genuinely happy at me trying to improve myself and she probably liked me the most when I acted like a lazy slob rather than careermaxxing so that she can be “useful” and have someone to “relate” to. The fact that she waited for over two weeks after blocking me before unsubbing from my channel and deleting her Discord account seemed awfully suspicious. It’s almost as if her blocking me was some nuclear tier shit-test to see if I would make an effort to reach out to her, even though she later claimed to be “scared” of me over long-distance texting JFL. If that’s so, I’m not interested in such games. Such woman is never worth an iota of our attention in the first place.
In fact, I think I noticed her gradually getting less talkative the more I revealed about myself, and perhaps she sensed I didn’t have it as “bad” as she did. This kinda reminds me of the phenomena where women actually hate it if a man “ascends”, as if they’re trying to disrupt the “natural order” of things and not accepting their own mediocrity. Hence why we should never talk about our looksmaxxing to women, just like we don’t talk about Fight Club. It seems that only chad can avoid having to deal with all this bullshit.
It didn’t help that I was too candid about my anxiety in starting a Youtube channel, trying to get it to be perfect, which is just the opposite of effortless action. If I had told her that I was running a channel the whole time and acted like it was just part of my identity, instead of a huge project, it might’ve had less of an emotional impact on her. Although it would’ve meant she wouldn’t have tried to get closer to me in the first place since being a content creator would’ve shown that I had a degree of emotional self-reliance.
I think a lot of men including myself made the mistake of assuming that women have no ego and are gentle and compassionate beings (Women-are-wonderful effect). Women have egos too even if it’s not through accomplishments. No one really talks about this, but people can also derive their self-esteem from how much they are able to help people, how others depend on them, yet secretly expect something in return. It’s like MrBeast who’s supposedly the most “generous man in the world”. But I don’t think he’d be doing any philanthropy if there wasn't any money and fame in it.
She never seemed to be genuinely happy at me trying to improve myself and she probably liked me the most when I acted like a lazy slob rather than careermaxxing so that she can be “useful” and have someone to “relate” to. The fact that she waited for over two weeks after blocking me before unsubbing from my channel and deleting her Discord account seemed awfully suspicious. It’s almost as if her blocking me was some nuclear tier shit-test to see if I would make an effort to reach out to her, even though she later claimed to be “scared” of me over long-distance texting JFL. If that’s so, I’m not interested in such games. Such woman is never worth an iota of our attention in the first place.
In fact, I think I noticed her gradually getting less talkative the more I revealed about myself, and perhaps she sensed I didn’t have it as “bad” as she did. This kinda reminds me of the phenomena where women actually hate it if a man “ascends”, as if they’re trying to disrupt the “natural order” of things and not accepting their own mediocrity. Hence why we should never talk about our looksmaxxing to women, just like we don’t talk about Fight Club. It seems that only chad can avoid having to deal with all this bullshit.
Relevant threads:
Even if you slay, if you are sub-chad, you are still incel
The vagueness of the term “inceldom” A lot of ppl often see the term “incel” as synonymous with KHHV, but inceldom is actually a lot about mentality rather than a state of being and all it takes to have such mentality is be sub-chad or just be unlucky. The problem with treating “incel” as...
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No one cares about your struggles and the importance of effortlessness
Tennis rivalry analogy For any tenniscels out there or not, I’m sure you’ve at least heard of the Big 3 of tennis, Roger, Nadal and Djokovic. For years, there has been debate about who the “GOAT” of tennis is, specifically between Federer and Djokovic. If you can do basic maths, you would know...
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Effortless action (Wu wei) is the logical response to the blackpill
Wu wei (effortless action) There’s a concept that no one really talks about enough and that is the ancient Chinese concept of “Wu wei”. This concept basically means “effortless action”, and is the practice of not taking any action that is not in accord with the natural course of the universe. I...
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Once I graduated college, it was like my “free trial” of getting psuedochad treatment from her was over and she had more expectations about me and saw me as someone who was obliged to hang out and play games with whenever she demanded. When I confessed to her, even though she said that we weren’t a good match at the moment, it probably raised her expectations towards me to be a “better” man. Any “mistake” I made would’ve been a death sentence. Although if it was chad, none of this would’ve been “mistakes” and he wouldn’t have been held to such expectations in the first place.
She accused me of only liking the “idea" of her, but the truth is we are both guilty of this issue. The fact that she felt drained by the friendship, even though I made it known that I was mentally unwell right from the beginning and never changed my personality indicated to me that me “venting” itself wasn’t actually the real issue, but more of her holding some unrealistic expectations towards me after I graduated. This might be cope but I think that having such expectations played a role in her choosing to delete her Discord account. Although it doesn’t necessarily mean she ever liked me romantically. Perhaps she really expected me to stay as a oofy doofy “doomer” and a lazy slob the whole time so that she can continue to have someone to “relate” to.
She accused me of only liking the “idea" of her, but the truth is we are both guilty of this issue. The fact that she felt drained by the friendship, even though I made it known that I was mentally unwell right from the beginning and never changed my personality indicated to me that me “venting” itself wasn’t actually the real issue, but more of her holding some unrealistic expectations towards me after I graduated. This might be cope but I think that having such expectations played a role in her choosing to delete her Discord account. Although it doesn’t necessarily mean she ever liked me romantically. Perhaps she really expected me to stay as a oofy doofy “doomer” and a lazy slob the whole time so that she can continue to have someone to “relate” to.
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If you feel weighed down by this site, it might be a sign you subconsciously romanticize it
When I mean “romanticize”, I don’t mean to personify the site as a woman and imagine you fucking it. Although you can think of it that way if it’s easier for you to understand. Rather it’s about attributing more meaning to the site than it “deserves”. Holding onto an idealized, distorted version...
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Women are never truly “lonely
This is probably the first mistake I made in choosing to keep in contact with her after I graduated (aside from the fact befriending a woman is already a mistake). It is having the assumption that a woman can be “lonely”. As in no man would ever want to interact with them kind of “lonely”. Perhaps I may have fallen into this girl’s trap of her telling me that she would be “alone” and have “no one to relate to” when I graduated college. If you see one cockroach in your house, there’s likely more of them lurking in the shadows. In a similar logic, if you see a woman, they’re never actually “alone”. There are always other men lurking in the shadows waiting to have their turns with her. Most men would be willing to stick their penis in any woman. Women could have the social skills of a 4 yr old and it wouldn’t matter. They could have disabilities like being bound to a wheelchair, blind, mute, etc. Doesn’t matter. Their “virtue” is innate. Infinite SMV just by having a pussy. It's pretty much like a law of reality almost, if a heterosexual woman doesn't have your penis inside her, given enough time another man's penis will be. In other words, I was always replaceable no matter how much she made me feel like I wasn’t.
I don’t consider myself a naturally compassionate person. But going through this experience made me develop the closest thing to compassion. The funny thing is if I was held at gunpoint to choose between saving the life of a rotter who disagreed with me on this site, or a random woman, I’d probably save the rotter. Since I’ve been through similar experiences as many users here, I developed a certain degree of compassion towards fellow men and apathy towards women. Plenty of others would be willing to save women, but not many would do the same for men, let alone a bottom of the barrel rotter on this site.
I don’t consider myself a naturally compassionate person. But going through this experience made me develop the closest thing to compassion. The funny thing is if I was held at gunpoint to choose between saving the life of a rotter who disagreed with me on this site, or a random woman, I’d probably save the rotter. Since I’ve been through similar experiences as many users here, I developed a certain degree of compassion towards fellow men and apathy towards women. Plenty of others would be willing to save women, but not many would do the same for men, let alone a bottom of the barrel rotter on this site.
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You simps and cucks still don’t understand that women are never single
Had a look at the comments section of those e-thot clips where the female streamers claim to be “single” and how they’re a “failure”. All the simps are like “she’s just like me fr fr”. No she isn’t you absolute schmuck. The truth is women never take “Ls” for missing IOIs (unless it’s from chad...
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The dark-triad pill
This was probably the most brutal blackpill I had to swallow from this experience. And that was being cucked by that asian 4chan guy. This asian guy was insanely low-inhib and even once sent a pic onto the server of him in a maid outfit and cat ears. Yet this girl finds no problem with it and probably sees it as strangely erotic and taboo to her, given her fucked up mental state at that point.
When I was texting with the girl after I graduated, she often complained about this asian guy treating her badly and calling her things like “roach”, almost as if to make her self-esteem dependent on him. I quickly realized what he was doing to her was “negging”. While I know that negging itself is a redpill technique, the fact that this girl in particular seemed to fall for it was quite blackpilling. It made me wonder what her mom would’ve thought about her tolerating a random guy making a degrading sexual comment about her and her daughter not defending her name, and instead letting it slide, she continues to associate herself with him like he’s the second coming of Christ. Given that she liked to talk about “respecting elders”, if her parents had any honor and dignity at all, they should be very ashamed of their daughter and how she’s letting herself be degraded like that.
It somewhat convinced me that a man treating a woman with respect doesn’t seem to matter much at all, as they seem to be more interested in novelty and thrill of it all. Perhaps I might still be friends with her today or even progressed even further had I spoken to her in the same degrading manner as that guy did, instead of trying to establish a sincere bond with her. It made me think “why put in any effort at all when doing the bare minimum could’ve gotten me more results?”. She was the only girl I tried my best and displayed utmost authenticity for. But in the end it didn’t matter. It felt like rando from this site could’ve swooped in and bagged her when she was at her “lowest” if they were running the low-inhib dark-triad game.
It’s like how women are abstaining from sex with their husbands in the 4B movement, even though their husbands have done nothing wrong and are probably the most supportive men they have in their lives. Yet the men that they have flings with are most likely Trump supporters and wouldn’t take any bullshit from them.
When I was texting with the girl after I graduated, she often complained about this asian guy treating her badly and calling her things like “roach”, almost as if to make her self-esteem dependent on him. I quickly realized what he was doing to her was “negging”. While I know that negging itself is a redpill technique, the fact that this girl in particular seemed to fall for it was quite blackpilling. It made me wonder what her mom would’ve thought about her tolerating a random guy making a degrading sexual comment about her and her daughter not defending her name, and instead letting it slide, she continues to associate herself with him like he’s the second coming of Christ. Given that she liked to talk about “respecting elders”, if her parents had any honor and dignity at all, they should be very ashamed of their daughter and how she’s letting herself be degraded like that.
It somewhat convinced me that a man treating a woman with respect doesn’t seem to matter much at all, as they seem to be more interested in novelty and thrill of it all. Perhaps I might still be friends with her today or even progressed even further had I spoken to her in the same degrading manner as that guy did, instead of trying to establish a sincere bond with her. It made me think “why put in any effort at all when doing the bare minimum could’ve gotten me more results?”. She was the only girl I tried my best and displayed utmost authenticity for. But in the end it didn’t matter. It felt like rando from this site could’ve swooped in and bagged her when she was at her “lowest” if they were running the low-inhib dark-triad game.
It’s like how women are abstaining from sex with their husbands in the 4B movement, even though their husbands have done nothing wrong and are probably the most supportive men they have in their lives. Yet the men that they have flings with are most likely Trump supporters and wouldn’t take any bullshit from them.
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Why sub-5 ethnics are able to slay more than normie men in the west
“The normie purgatory” You might sometimes see that some women nowadays are in relationships with sub-5 ethnics, which you might think disproves the blackpill. But I think it actually confirms existing blackpill theories on the feminine psyche. There is something I refer to as the “normie...
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Brutal Final Fantasy dark-triad pill
I’m usually not autistic enough to remember video game lore, but for any finalfantasycels, there’s this one part of FF7 that always stuck out to me. And that is how this guy called Vincent here: caught oneitis for this bitch below called Lucrercia or whatever the fuck: She then friend-zoned...
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Women should always be held accountable for their actions, yet aren't
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The brutal feeling of watching innocence get stripped away
Watching a seemingly innocent girl like her get degraded and corrupted like that must feel like being an American witnessing 9/11 and watching the Twin Towers get hit and collapse in real-time. Most women nowadays are like the same dull square office buildings, because globalism is slowly killing culture even in Asia and other trad countries. Historical landmarks are what make a city have its own character, hence you are more likely to feel attachment to that place and see it as something worth protecting. Watching a pure woman get corrupted and get turned into any basic white hoe is like watching a historic landmark be destroyed or be converted into another office building. A woman losing her virginity is like her dying for the first time. This makes a lot of sense when guys talk about “slaying” women when they bed them. They're putting in their entire essence to "slaughter" a woman. The extra topping on all of this is that orgasm in french is called “le petit mort”, literally meaning “the little death”. They are basically given the taste of death for the first time.
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It kinda sounds like we're all interacting with the same woman
Almost every post I read here relating to women’s behaviour makes me feel like they’re talking about the same women I’ve interacted with in the past. No matter their race, white, black, asian, etc, it’s like they’re just game reskins of one another, just as long as they’re slightly westernized...
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TL;DR:
Befriended a girl in college who claimed to be “virgin by choice”. Lot of my physical attraction towards her was because of the fact that she claimed to be a virgin. She gave me pseudochad treatment because she saw me as someone who was going through the same “struggles” as she was. This led me to gradually develop feelings towards her. When I graduated, she desperately wanted to stay in contact with me through Discord cause she was afraid of being “alone”. She starts DMing me a lot after I graduated to vent about her college stresses. I started career and hobbymaxxing by starting a Youtube channel to develop a sense of emotional self-reliance in case things don’t go well, knowing the stakes between us. Although I kept my channel a secret from her so that I didn’t cave in from the pressure. Unfortunately, I caved in from bottling up my feelings towards her and had to confess through text. Although with no expectation of us becoming official, very well knowing that it would end the friendship. She said that we weren’t a good match at the moment but still saw me as a great friend and wanted to continue being that way in the meantime.
As things went back to normal, few weeks later I moronically asked her if I could vent to her about my own insecurities and she allowed me, which might’ve dealt a significant blow to the friendship. Just two weeks later, I finally revealed my Youtube channel to her all whilst talking about the setbacks I had to endure, in particular from my loud neighbours. Thinking that all is well, she says goodbye and blocks me the next morning, even deleting her Discord account few weeks later. Few months later, from word of mouth, I found out she had returned on a new Discord account. I joined the college server she was on to seek closure from her. Although before I could do that, I noticed her talking and gaming with an asian guy on the server who was negging her like crazy with lot of sexual jokes. Caving in from the cuckening, I finally asked one of the guys on the server to ask her if I could DM her. She accepted my DM request and said that it would be our last convo. She told me the reason she left me was because I kept “venting” to her (hypocrite much). Yet she never communicated this to me as a problem. I didn’t try to argue with her knowing that her mind was set anyway and left without the server without a fight.
In retrospect, I think my biggest mistake that led to me fumbling this girl was being overly ambitious and going balls deep into career and hobbymaxxing to the point where I came off as a tryhard. A man should "Work hard. Play hard", but because of me wanting to ascend so badly in life, I only "worked hard". I stayed true to myself the whole time, but if the girl saw this a personal attack, then it's her problem. It's weird because I simultaneously feel regret, yet no regret at the same time once I got blackpilled by this "friendship". Fast forward one year later and here I am writing this thread.
As things went back to normal, few weeks later I moronically asked her if I could vent to her about my own insecurities and she allowed me, which might’ve dealt a significant blow to the friendship. Just two weeks later, I finally revealed my Youtube channel to her all whilst talking about the setbacks I had to endure, in particular from my loud neighbours. Thinking that all is well, she says goodbye and blocks me the next morning, even deleting her Discord account few weeks later. Few months later, from word of mouth, I found out she had returned on a new Discord account. I joined the college server she was on to seek closure from her. Although before I could do that, I noticed her talking and gaming with an asian guy on the server who was negging her like crazy with lot of sexual jokes. Caving in from the cuckening, I finally asked one of the guys on the server to ask her if I could DM her. She accepted my DM request and said that it would be our last convo. She told me the reason she left me was because I kept “venting” to her (hypocrite much). Yet she never communicated this to me as a problem. I didn’t try to argue with her knowing that her mind was set anyway and left without the server without a fight.
In retrospect, I think my biggest mistake that led to me fumbling this girl was being overly ambitious and going balls deep into career and hobbymaxxing to the point where I came off as a tryhard. A man should "Work hard. Play hard", but because of me wanting to ascend so badly in life, I only "worked hard". I stayed true to myself the whole time, but if the girl saw this a personal attack, then it's her problem. It's weird because I simultaneously feel regret, yet no regret at the same time once I got blackpilled by this "friendship". Fast forward one year later and here I am writing this thread.
MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY ROTTING
Tags: @TiktokUser @Darkeningstar @bloomercel @autistic_tendencies @Clown Show @Sushifart @Chadeep @Niko. @JohnDoe @Bodhisattva @h111 @SharpOrange @FutureSlayer @Primalsplit @Latinolooksmaxxer @whotthehell
