How would one produce a fake tape measure and ruler with fake markings?

[6ft4]

An aspie idea I just thought of
If I ever started banging an inexperienced girl and a conversation came up about my dick measurements, it would be convenient to say "I cant remember exactly, I haven't measured in years, let me measure again" and I already have prepared a ruler where the markings on it are not accurate, meaning that when I place the ruler against my dick, instead of my dick reaching the 7" mark it will reach the 9" mark.
Imagine the halo of a girl believing you have a 9 inch dick. Sure it wont change how big you feel inside her but she will be aware that 9 inches is an extremely uncommon measurement so it will make her see you as being more rare and irreplaceable than you really are.
You could also then go onto a website where you search what percentile you are based on your measurement and show the girl that you are 99.9th percentile
I slayed a low IQ girl years ago who was dumb enough to believe that a guy she fucked before me had a 9 inch dick just because that was what he claimed. Due to the fact he was a chubby potato looking manlet I would put my life savings on him larping rather than believe the 1/1000 chance he's the extreme outlier

 

[Vermilioncore]

0

 

[stewiegriffin]

It’s better to not say any measurements since girls are retarded. I’m 7inch and larped to my girl that I’m 8inch (which she believed). The thing is, I don’t think a lot of girls even think 8inches is that big since everyone frauds. Anyway My gfs friend said she fucked a guy with an 11 and a half inch dick (clearly not true) and my gf and all her friends believed her as I sat there like this with my fake 8 incher

 

[OldRooster]

Amazon product ASIN B07VH8SS2T

 

[6ft4]

Amazon product ASIN B07VH8SS2T

Fuark, I'll buy one of these in future

 

[aBetterMii]

They already exist