ElySioNs
Mercenary
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- Feb 7, 2021
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So, I dated Adrian for all 4 years of high school. He's probably the kindest, most caring, and most genuine person I know. He's always been there for me, and I was really happy when I was with him. He's from a very traditional and conservative Christian family, and he's told me near the beginning of our relationship that he wanted to remain abstinent until marriage. Honestly it always kind of bothered me a little bit that he didn't want to have sex, but I told him I agreed and I would wait with him. This past summer was the last summer we would be together before we went away to different colleges (Him in the midwest, me on the west coast). However, my parents wanted me to get a head start on my classes, so I had to spend the summer at my college. He couldn't visit me because of money issues, so we Skyped pretty frequently in the beginning, but he also started working a full time job and had other commitments so the frequency of our calls became less and less. And because of schedule conflicts, I wasn't able to fly back in time to see him, but we made plans to see each other during winter break.
Since school started about a month ago, I had just been in a tremendous amount of stress. I'm rushing a sorority, taking a heavy courseload, and on the cheerleaders' team as well. I'd be so stressed out every single night, and I'd look for comfort from him. But we Skyped less and less because of his work and classes commitment, and I felt like he became a lot more emotionally distant as well during our calls. I just didn't feel like he cared anymore, but looking back, I was really selfish and didn't consider how much stress he was under. Also my sorority sisters weren't good influences on our relationship. They kept telling me to drop him and said some untruthful and mean things about him.
So, I decided to break it off with him. I Skyped him and told him how I felt, and we both cried. It was really difficult, and I kept asking myself if I had made the right decision--I didn't. He begged for me back, but I told him that I was done but that I would always think of him as one of my closest friends. He said that he would respect our friendship, but it'll be hard for him not to want to be in a relationship with me.
After we broke up, I was in a really bad place. Last Friday night, I was out with my sorority sisters at a party, and I met Xavier. We were brief acquaintances because he was on the football team and I the cheerleaders'. Long story short, we had sex and decided to start dating--or so I thought. When I woke up in the morning, he was already gone. And for the rest of the week, whenever I'd text him, he'd either not reply or with really short answers. I also heard from a friend that he was bragging about how he "took my virginity" and " (my friend saw the text messages he sent to his friends). I finally confronted him yesterday and he basically said he was drunk and didn't really want to date, and that he was sorry for sending the texts (because, surprise, he was drunk when sent it).
I went back to my dorm after the confrontation and realized how stupid I was, and I thought back to how selfish and immature and childish I was with Adrian. I ended up calling him. We talked, and I realized how much I missed him and he missed me. We decided to get back together.
The only problem is, I know his family and he are super religious, and his family definitely does not approve of pre-marital sex). Adrian isn't judgmental at all, and I feel like I should tell him that I had sex with someone else, but I'm worried about how he would respond to that. I'm also worried that he would think lowly of me. Is it right of me to not tell him about it? After all, we broke up, and it was just a one-time thing.
tl;dr: Broke up with HS boyfriend b/c long distance and emotionally distant. Got back together with him but not sure if I should tell him about my hookup while we were separated due to his super religious background.
Since school started about a month ago, I had just been in a tremendous amount of stress. I'm rushing a sorority, taking a heavy courseload, and on the cheerleaders' team as well. I'd be so stressed out every single night, and I'd look for comfort from him. But we Skyped less and less because of his work and classes commitment, and I felt like he became a lot more emotionally distant as well during our calls. I just didn't feel like he cared anymore, but looking back, I was really selfish and didn't consider how much stress he was under. Also my sorority sisters weren't good influences on our relationship. They kept telling me to drop him and said some untruthful and mean things about him.
So, I decided to break it off with him. I Skyped him and told him how I felt, and we both cried. It was really difficult, and I kept asking myself if I had made the right decision--I didn't. He begged for me back, but I told him that I was done but that I would always think of him as one of my closest friends. He said that he would respect our friendship, but it'll be hard for him not to want to be in a relationship with me.
After we broke up, I was in a really bad place. Last Friday night, I was out with my sorority sisters at a party, and I met Xavier. We were brief acquaintances because he was on the football team and I the cheerleaders'. Long story short, we had sex and decided to start dating--or so I thought. When I woke up in the morning, he was already gone. And for the rest of the week, whenever I'd text him, he'd either not reply or with really short answers. I also heard from a friend that he was bragging about how he "took my virginity" and " (my friend saw the text messages he sent to his friends). I finally confronted him yesterday and he basically said he was drunk and didn't really want to date, and that he was sorry for sending the texts (because, surprise, he was drunk when sent it).
I went back to my dorm after the confrontation and realized how stupid I was, and I thought back to how selfish and immature and childish I was with Adrian. I ended up calling him. We talked, and I realized how much I missed him and he missed me. We decided to get back together.
The only problem is, I know his family and he are super religious, and his family definitely does not approve of pre-marital sex). Adrian isn't judgmental at all, and I feel like I should tell him that I had sex with someone else, but I'm worried about how he would respond to that. I'm also worried that he would think lowly of me. Is it right of me to not tell him about it? After all, we broke up, and it was just a one-time thing.
tl;dr: Broke up with HS boyfriend b/c long distance and emotionally distant. Got back together with him but not sure if I should tell him about my hookup while we were separated due to his super religious background.
