I am afraid I'm gonna die alone

[Raimaxxing]

For the longest time I told myself that money was the answer. Grind, stack cash, escape everything. I thought if I was financially set, the emptiness would disappear. But lately I’ve been realizing that even if I get rich, I still feel like my life would be hollow.

I don’t really feel wanted. Relationships feel out of reach, like no matter what I improve or chase, I’m still fundamentally behind. Looks, status, social skills, there’s always something missing. I see people my age forming connections naturally while I’m stuck overanalyzing everything and ending up alone anyway.

What scares me most is the idea that this doesn’t change. That I’ll keep “maxing” things on paper money, routine, discipline but still come home to silence. No one to share wins with, no one who genuinely chooses me. Just distractions until time runs out.

I don’t even know what I want anymore. It’s not just money. It’s not just attraction. I think I just want to feel like my existence actually matters to someone. Right now it feels like I’m grinding for a future that might still be empty.

Not sure what the answer. Just needed to say this shit

 

[Raimaxxing]

 

[Number1Greycel]

Go for a walk