I am depressed, lonely, and I see no point in living in this world

[BrothaGus]

My mindset is so fucked. Like so fucked. I am not even in my own head. I have no "true" self. I might be mentally insane. I feel like I am bipolar.

I would literally not be fucking surprised if I was diagnosed as mentally insane or bipolar

Things don't feel real, everything feels fake

I have no motivation to talk to people or to do things unless it hurts the things I want.
I had bad grades last school semester but this semester my lowest grade is a 98 bc my mom told me if I don't lock in I lose gym phone and everything
When I try at things, I do good but I have no motivation. I don't think this comes from low test or something, I have masculine features and above average dick

Sometimes I feel like my brain is hijacked by something random and I have no control over my actions

my whole life is a lie. my confidence is fake, my social skills are fake, everything about me is a fraud, nothing is real about me, I don't give a shit about anyone. my whole family could die and I would wake up the next day indifferent

why am I like this
I know this is not normal

roping doesn't sound that bad anymore

I feel like I have 3 different persons living inside of me - depressed and suicidal self, happy and motivated self, and indifferent self and they all combat against each other

what do I do
I have like a fixed mindset and I see no escape

ive dug a whole by being on this incel forum and going into depth about philosophy and lookism so deep I can't get out of it
im truly fucked by my personality and true self, even though I feel as if I don't have a true self. my essence is purely nothing. I am nothing. nothing is real. nothing about me or my brain or my personality or true self is real.

I need a personality and mindset transplant. My whole life is a lie. I don't look bad at all. I get told I have good looks, but my mindset and personality and anxiety is what makes me an incel. I have no escape. it is over.

has anyone experienced something like this, and have they been able to create a version of themself that is real and genuine, and not an act/lie?

edit: one of my friends has the best charisma and social skills that I have ever seen. he is ltn, yet I have no doubt he will go wherever he wants in life because of his social skills. he has been with countless bad bitches even though he's not that good looking. I mog him to death, yet I'd trade lives with him in a heartbeat if I had the opportunity

 

[donpuro]

would you say alot of it started after you stumbled across this forum?

 

[BrothaGus]

would you say alot of it started after you stumbled across this forum?

yes, it started when I got deeply invested in lookism and blackpill ideology. it changed my whole perspective.
but I don't think I will ever forget all this

 

[Clqs]

Line's long bud

 

[Clqs]

yes, it started when I got deeply invested in lookism and blackpill ideology. it changed my whole perspective.
but I don't think I will ever forget all this

 

[BrothaGus]

shut your bitchass up

you've probably never had a critical or deep thought before

 

[chudpiller]

Might need to self-inflict a traumatic brain injury to cop some retrograde amnesia

 

[Clqs]

shut your bitchass up

you've probably never had a critical or deep thought before

It's funny and annoying at the same time seeing dumbass teens going through their phases thinking they're the shit

But you're a level above that, you're extra cringy

 

[BrothaGus]

would you say alot of it started after you stumbled across this forum?

btw ive been in blackpill ideology for a little over a year. this is my 2nd account

 

[BrothaGus]

z

 

[donpuro]

btw ive been in blackpill ideology for a little over a year. this is my 2nd account

well tbh im sure half the fucking forum especially the offtopic niggas relate to the original post.
you have to eventuall leave all of this behind you ever wanna be truly happy imo
I tagged you in a post that talks about this exact scenario you are just very deep into the layers of it.

 

[BrothaGus]

It's funny and annoying at the same time seeing dumbass teens going through their phases thinking they're the shit

But you're a level above that, you're extra cringy

more suifuel

 

[BrothaGus]

well tbh im sure half the fucking forum especially the offtopic niggas relate to the original post.
you have to eventuall leave all of this behind you ever wanna be truly happy imo
I tagged you in a post that talks about this exact scenario you are just very deep into the layers of it.

thank you for your help.

 

[g4rlic]

wait so supposedly you have a friend who ascends BP but ur upset Abt what you've learned on this forum. I think you should talk to a therapist

 

[BrothaGus]

wait so supposedly you have a friend who ascends BP but ur upset Abt what you've learned on this forum. I think you should talk to a therapist

my friend is a normie, he naturally has top tier charisma and social skills
and its not 100% about what ive learned on this forum, it's about the unhealthy mental state loop it's put me in

 

[g4rlic]

my friend is a normie, he naturally has top tier charisma and social skills
and its not 100% about what ive learned on this forum, it's about the unhealthy mental state loop it's put me in

Then just delete