I am unable to form deep connections with people

[Deleted member 123193]

No matter how hard I try, I always resort to blocking out people in my life. I don’t care for them and I hold a lot of resentment towards people for really no reason at all. I have quite literally no friends. My contact in my phone is my mom and my dad. My 50 year old mother goes out and socializes with her friends more than me and I’m 18, just graduated hs ( did not attend ceremony cause I’m too sigma for that superficial bs) (and I wish all my classmates get stuck in a house fire and get fried slowly). Literally the summer right after graduating hs. Not a single party, not a single girl in my phone, I deleted all social media a couple years ago. Never looked back. People try to be my friend at school but I internally know it will never be anything more than a person to talk to at school, nothing outside of it. I have not always been like this as in elementary school I had quite a lot of friends. Anyways, I don’t care anymore tbh. Like fuck i can’t help but get this feeling like how I am so retarded for spending all this time stressing over my orbital vector and gonial angle, booking consultations for major surgery at 18. All the other kids my age are having a good time, fucking hoes and what not. To be honest, I never really wanted a gf. I want to fuck but the post nut clarity would probably end up making me beat that whore until she is unconscious. I think the problem with me is not looks, many girls have given me IOI at school. Literally have come up to me walking right next to me at school side by side literally waiting for me to say something. I just never do because idk. God typing this makes me want to rip out my fucking eyeballs

 

[lastredeemer]

not even a single second

 

[Vantablack]

same bhai, i relate to everything you said. Its the life of an ND, it is what it is

 

[superpsycho]

same

 

[SkiSquadJPG]

Every atom. You force yourself to connect with people you cant relate with, find new people that feel more like you

 

[GenZ]

Hey brother, this sounds awfully like me so I thought I could definitely chip in. Now I wouldn't say it gets easier for you necessarily but it will probably get a lot harder for them. What I mean is, and I'm basing this off my experiences and situation but maybe you could relate, I've always found that school was a painful drag full of awful people, some of those people were exactly the ones lifemogging me at the time but the tables do flip after a certain time. For me it was when I turned 19 and shit just started getting aligned more and more my way. Firstly I accepted the fraudpill, I conditioned myself to be lower inhib and started noticing that a lot of the people that would dominate you in high school are total losers in the world outside it. If you can hold down an alright job you're ahead of like 80% to 90% of these retards.

 

[ijustwannaascendlol]

No matter how hard I try, I always resort to blocking out people in my life. I don’t care for them and I hold a lot of resentment towards people for really no reason at all. I have quite literally no friends. My contact in my phone is my mom and my dad. My 50 year old mother goes out and socializes with her friends more than me and I’m 18, just graduated hs ( did not attend ceremony cause I’m too sigma for that superficial bs) (and I wish all my classmates get stuck in a house fire and get fried slowly). Literally the summer right after graduating hs. Not a single party, not a single girl in my phone, I deleted all social media a couple years ago. Never looked back. People try to be my friend at school but I internally know it will never be anything more than a person to talk to at school, nothing outside of it. I have not always been like this as in elementary school I had quite a lot of friends. Anyways, I don’t care anymore tbh. Like fuck i can’t help but get this feeling like how I am so retarded for spending all this time stressing over my orbital vector and gonial angle, booking consultations for major surgery at 18. All the other kids my age are having a good time, fucking hoes and what not. To be honest, I never really wanted a gf. I want to fuck but the post nut clarity would probably end up making me beat that whore until she is unconscious. I think the problem with me is not looks, many girls have given me IOI at school. Literally have come up to me walking right next to me at school side by side literally waiting for me to say something. I just never do because idk. God typing this makes me want to rip out my fucking eyeballs

Relatable tbh, i feel like that but i am still in hs so something can change (cope)

 

[Jeremy Meeks]

No matter how hard I try, I always resort to blocking out people in my life. I don’t care for them and I hold a lot of resentment towards people for really no reason at all. I have quite literally no friends. My contact in my phone is my mom and my dad. My 50 year old mother goes out and socializes with her friends more than me and I’m 18, just graduated hs ( did not attend ceremony cause I’m too sigma for that superficial bs) (and I wish all my classmates get stuck in a house fire and get fried slowly). Literally the summer right after graduating hs. Not a single party, not a single girl in my phone, I deleted all social media a couple years ago. Never looked back. People try to be my friend at school but I internally know it will never be anything more than a person to talk to at school, nothing outside of it. I have not always been like this as in elementary school I had quite a lot of friends. Anyways, I don’t care anymore tbh. Like fuck i can’t help but get this feeling like how I am so retarded for spending all this time stressing over my orbital vector and gonial angle, booking consultations for major surgery at 18. All the other kids my age are having a good time, fucking hoes and what not. To be honest, I never really wanted a gf. I want to fuck but the post nut clarity would probably end up making me beat that whore until she is unconscious. I think the problem with me is not looks, many girls have given me IOI at school. Literally have come up to me walking right next to me at school side by side literally waiting for me to say something. I just never do because idk. God typing this makes me want to rip out my fucking eyeballs

Mentality moggs me, friends are inherently bad, if you don’t emotionally need them, chad trait if you don’t feel the need to connect

 

[CorinthianLOX]

Same