I consistently waste 2-3 hours a day fanticizing about having a gf

[JustCallMeKash]

Title

 

[Deleted member 71172]

Rookie numbers lol

 

[JustCallMeKash]

Rookie numbers lol be alot worse, but my time decreased since I have exams

It was alot worse before, but I have exams to study for now

 

[91302]

you could easily trannymax and be tyrone's bitch.

 

[JustCallMeKash]

you could easily trannymax and be tyrone's bitch.

Would be a waste of my bbc

 

[Deprived]

try looksmaxxing

 

[91302]

Would be a waste of my bbc

U already are. at least u can lock that thing in a chastity so that its not in daddy''s way

 

[Deleted member 71172]

you could easily trannymax and be tyrone's bitch.

Avi

 

[Bloatedcelbag]

Its a good feeling to be loved

 

[noodlelover]

Why would you spend time fantasizing about a goal, rather than working towards it?

 

[Bartenderofnashv]

2-3 hours a day? What are you a beginner? I spend the whole day fantasizing abt having a loving gf

 

[Bartenderofnashv]

Why would you spend time fantasizing about a goal, rather than working towards it?

Coz its impossible for me to get a girlfriend

 

[dopaminebeyondfried]

Manifest

 

[noodlelover]

Coz its impossible for me to get a girlfriend

What evidence do you have to believe that?

 

[Bartenderofnashv]

What evidence do you have to believe that?

The fact that I never had a gf… I mean I didn’t have one coz I was ugly as shit, but now that im kinda gl I have a chance to but the inceldom and autisme from my past will never let me

 

[noodlelover]

The fact that I never had a gf… I mean I didn’t have one coz I was ugly as shit, but now that im kinda gl I have a chance to but the inceldom and autisme from my past will never let me

Now that you are kind of good looking, do you think it is possible for you to learn the social skills required to get a girlfriend?

 

[Bartenderofnashv]

Now that you are kind of good looking, do you think it is possible for you to learn the social skills required to get a girlfriend?

yeah i do but it will be hard asf and idk if it will fit me tbh

 

[noodlelover]

yeah i do but it will be hard asf and idk if it will fit me tbh

I see. What do you mean by, this part? You don't know if learning social skills to get a girlfriend would "fit you"?

 

[Bartenderofnashv]

I see. What do you mean by, this part? You don't know if learning social skills to get a girlfriend would "fit you"?

yup... i think ill get overwhelmed quickly and i alr tried it and i didnt geel like myself i felt like i was trying to becomea new person from ground zero which left me feeling lost

 

[SubSigma]

Thats nothing

 

[noodlelover]

yup... i think ill get overwhelmed quickly and i alr tried it and i didnt geel like myself i felt like i was trying to becomea new person from ground zero which left me feeling lost

I tried cold approach in my twenties with zero social skills and got no where with it as well.

I think cold approach is more of an advanced thing you can learn, only after having a solid base of social skills and having practiced talking to a wide range of personalities including feminine personalities, for thousands of hours. Baby Steps get you to big goals, but it takes time.

What I recommend is joining a church/mosque and try talking to people after "service" if you can. If not, stand there until some one comes up and talks to you. The people who talk to you will be guys and old people. It's not about meeting women, it's about building the base skill of talking to many different kinds of people, fluidly and naturally. Switch churches/mosques every once in a while, if you feel like you're only talking to the same people every week. You want practice talking to a few hundred people at minimum.

Social skills are transferable. Over time, you'll start picking up humor, and different ways of talking from different people. Talking to nerdy guys (Guys into computers, programming, technology) will give you the least amount of social skills transferable to women, so it's fine to start with them, but you want to move on quickly. Talking to guys that are good with women, charismatic guys, funny guys, and women (even old women) will allow you to pick up more social skills. You want to gradually push yourself into conversations with the most charismatic people, which you won't have the social skills to talk to for long in the beginning (because there is so much competition for those people's attention).

Go to all the events that you can, church dinners, outings, mission trips, even men's bible study, and stay late for all of them to talk to whoever is staying late. Volunteer to help out with things as well.

Think of this as building your base, and it's going to take thousands of hours. But beats 2-3 hours a day where you are fantasizing about your goals rather than moving towards them.

Only after you built up this solid base, of being very comfortable talking to a huge range of personalities (especially more feminine personalities, and emotional conversations rather than logical ones), do you go back to learning cold approach. Again this might take you somewhere between 3-8 years, but it's fine, if you're good looking you can do cold approach even in your forties and fifties tbh.

When you do start with cold approach, just find routines and approaches online to try or in books, but first build a solid base of social skills. And yes, cold approach will still be scary, and uncomfortable, and you won't want to do it, but having a base of social skills, and understanding many different kinds of people will make it possible to learn.

Do you think this approach could work for you? Will you do it? Or any part of it?

 

[Bartenderofnashv]

I tried cold approach in my twenties with zero social skills and got no where with it as well.

I think cold approach is more of an advanced thing you can learn, only after having a solid base of social skills and having practiced talking to a wide range of personalities including feminine personalities, for thousands of hours. Baby Steps get you to big goals, but it takes time.

What I recommend is joining a church/mosque and try talking to people after "service" if you can. If not, stand there until some one comes up and talks to you. The people who talk to you will be guys and old people. It's not about meeting women, it's about building the base skill of talking to many different kinds of people, fluidly and naturally. Switch churches/mosques every once in a while, if you feel like you're only talking to the same people every week. You want practice talking to a few hundred people at minimum.

Social skills are transferable. Over time, you'll start picking up humor, and different ways of talking from different people. Talking to nerdy guys (Guys into computers, programming, technology) will give you the least amount of social skills transferable to women, so it's fine to start with them, but you want to move on quickly. Talking to guys that are good with women, charismatic guys, funny guys, and women (even old women) will allow you to pick up more social skills. You want to gradually push yourself into conversations with the most charismatic people, which you won't have the social skills to talk to for long in the beginning (because there is so much competition for those people's attention).

Go to all the events that you can, church dinners, outings, mission trips, even men's bible study, and stay late for all of them to talk to whoever is staying late. Volunteer to help out with things as well.

Think of this as building your base, and it's going to take thousands of hours. But beats 2-3 hours a day where you are fantasizing about your goals rather than moving towards them.

Only after you built up this solid base, of being very comfortable talking to a huge range of personalities (especially more feminine personalities, and emotional conversations rather than logical ones), do you go back to learning cold approach. Again this might take you somewhere between 3-8 years, but it's fine, if you're good looking you can do cold approach even in your forties and fifties tbh.

When you do start with cold approach, just find routines and approaches online to try or in books, but first build a solid base of social skills. And yes, cold approach will still be scary, and uncomfortable, and you won't want to do it, but having a base of social skills, and understanding many different kinds of people will make it possible to learn.

Do you think this approach could work for you? Will you do it? Or any part of it?

wow... thanks for the effort dude... really i appreciate it you should make this a thread imo... i do have some level of basic and a liittle bit advanced techniques of communication etc... i do have friends that i can easily talk to i can hold a convo with strangers like in a taxi at school in class etc... i can talk to girls easily too im not a fullblown incel but the problem is when i expose myself too quickly... i do have a good humor lol but... the proble for me is i find it very hard to find a girl to my taste i o like a girl rn and she is into me but i really dont know how to not show her thay i like her and im attached to her which will make her lose interest

 

[halloweed]

Title

that's not good bro

 

[Bojack]

might as well just use the law of attraction if that is the case

 

[noodlelover]

wow... thanks for the effort dude... really i appreciate it you should make this a thread imo... i do have some level of basic and a liittle bit advanced techniques of communication etc... i do have friends that i can easily talk to i can hold a convo with strangers like in a taxi at school in class etc... i can talk to girls easily too im not a fullblown incel but the problem is when i expose myself too quickly... i do have a good humor lol but... the proble for me is i find it very hard to find a girl to my taste i o like a girl rn and she is into me but i really dont know how to not show her thay i like her and im attached to her which will make her lose interest

For not showing interest, keep your mind focused on all the girls you could have success with once you learn how to be successful with women/improve your SMV. Do you best to imagine she's your nerdy little sister, and it would be weird to think of her like that. Also force yourself to think about how you're the most cool hot mother fucker around (even if it's not true). Yah, they'll be some cognitive dissonance, but as long as you try to force those thoughts, you'll come off better than if you just let your natural tendency to put her on a pedestal above you, run wild. You can try finding a movie, TV show, challenge, or game that you're going to watch or play regardless of weather she likes you or not, and put your energy focusing on looking forward to that, rather than on her.

Just tell her you're going out for drinks on Friday, and ask her if she wants to come. If she says she doesn't drink, tell her neither do you, you're getting a not-alcoholic drink but just want to go out and do something. If she says she's busy, say "How about next week?". If she says she's busy twice, drop it.

Then go out to the bar regardless. Start going once a week. Over time you'll get comfortable with the environment. Once you're comfortable and happy with the environment some girls will approach you. The fact that they approached you, will make them more attracted to you than the other way around because of the phycological principle known as "the consistency principle", and puts them in the chaser role, and you in the chased role. Imagine you're the most attractive, best looking person there (even if it's not true), this will change your vibe. If you go out ten times, this might happen two times, it's about putting in the consistency, week after week.

If it never happens, now you're comfortable with the environment, and ready to start practicing approaches. Set small goals, that gradually get bigger. Like, one approach at first. Write down the goal before hand, and continue the journal about weather you reached it or not the next day, and what stumbling blocks or barriers you faced that prevented you from reaching the goal, and what you'll do next time to try to reach it. Like, for example, "I forgot what to say after the opener and froze up. I'll lookup some things online, or use a generative Ai model to come up with some ideas, then practice them In-front of the mirror this week, so I remember them better next time." It's all about small steps, baby steps. Be willing to make mistakes and look like a weirdo. Mistakes are integral to getting good at anything, weather it's painting, or writing, or talking to girls.

It's all about bouncing back, error correcting, and trying a new strategy. Think of every girl as practice, for that perfect girl you'll one day meet. Maybe she doesn't go to bars normally, but she came out just this once with her friends, and meets all your requirements. Because you will meet her one day if you continue to push yourself and improve your SMV, which includes (Money, Status, Looks, Flirting Skills, Humor, Confidence, and Game).

You will also change as a person, from getting to know so many different women, and have an expanded palate, where you can enjoy a wider range of women, and personalities. Maybe certain women, annoy the shit out of you now, that you could enjoy in the future.

As far as making a thread I use this website to clarify my own thoughts, but I don't like giving too many people a competitive advantage over me, so I don't make many threads. I also write these long comments as well, because most people will see this wall of text and skip it.

TBH for this particular exchange, I was testing a few principles of phycology on you to see if I break you out of your limiting beliefs that prevent you from going after what you want. I guess those worked?

 

[Bartenderofnashv]

Dude who tf are you? What is this knowledge? And hell yeah they worked… honestly if you make this a thread and add all the coloured texts and images and shit you would be in the botb imo this is gold dude KEEP IT UP