I dont feel like I can actually change anything.

[Mongrelcel]

It's so over for me. Highschool me was such a chad compared to me now. I actually went outside to school, interacted with classmates, did my schoolwork, and actually had hope for the future.

Now I barely leave my bed, if I wasnt in such an easy school I would have failed out instantly, dont speak to anyone.

Everytime I decide to achieve something I fail even before I start. I cant actually push myself to do anything. I only listen to the same 10 songs over and over, and fantasise about having normal teen years or being chad. Anything thats outside of this gives me extreme anxiety and straight up panic attack, its hard to breathe. Even basic things like going to the post office.

For half a year ive been telling myself that ill start working hard at school so I can get a job in order to get money and looksmaxx - I havent spend a single second on it so far. And I know that I wont. Maybe killing myself will be the only think I will ever be sucessfull.

 

[Deleted member 2214]

You told me you have good cheekbones, which means you probably also have good jaw anglularity and a long chin.

 

[Mongrelcel]

You told me you have good cheekbones, which means you probably also have good jaw anglularity and a long chin.

we can sit here and discuss my facial ratios but the debate will always end with the fact that I've never had any positive interaction with a female, had maybe one or two minute long conversations during the entire highschool - and it was official business, they had to speak to me.

ive literally never interacted with a female

 

[Deleted member 2214]

we can sit here and discuss my facial ratios but the debate will always end with the fact that I've never had any positive interaction with a female, had maybe one or two minute long conversations during the entire highschool - and it was official business, they had to speak to me.

ive literally never interacted with a female

Well, you signed up here instead of Reddit, so I think you have potential to...

Die happy. Yes. Die happy, that's how I will describe your situation as. With company too.

Did you have a primary school GF at least or are you KH/KHHV?

 

[Mongrelcel]

Well, you signed up here instead of Reddit, so I think you have potential to...

Die happy. Yes. Die happy, that's how I will describe your situation as. With company too.

Did you have a primary school GF at least or are you KH/KHHV?

conversationless KH/KHHV. I dont even have a single female insta follower or facebook friend. In middleschool I was the class clown, Im kindof autistic so I tough people were laughing WITH me, but they were laughting AT me. People didnt see me as a sexual being - when I started crushing on one girl (ended up as my only rejection) everyone found it fucking hilarious - like when a little dog humps girls leg

 

[getra]

Lots of good info in the success section regarding social dilemmas

 

[Mongrelcel]

Lots of good info in the success section regarding social dilemmas

and yet noone actually overcame depression by lonely teenage years and no aspie here ever became NT

 

[Deleted member 10536]

It's so over for me. Highschool me was such a chad compared to me now. I actually went outside to school, interacted with classmates, did my schoolwork, and actually had hope for the future.

Now I barely leave my bed, if I wasnt in such an easy school I would have failed out instantly, dont speak to anyone.

Everytime I decide to achieve something I fail even before I start. I cant actually push myself to do anything. I only listen to the same 10 songs over and over, and fantasise about having normal teen years or being chad. Anything thats outside of this gives me extreme anxiety and straight up panic attack, its hard to breathe. Even basic things like going to the post office.

For half a year ive been telling myself that ill start working hard at school so I can get a job in order to get money and looksmaxx - I havent spend a single second on it so far. And I know that I wont. Maybe killing myself will be the only think I will ever be sucessfull.

Do copious amounts of drugs. You have to break through this bs. Understand how little sense it makes...
Idk how to do it, besides time, a lot of time, but nobody has fucking time in this world. So my advice, and I really don't want to advise people on taking drugs, but take drugs. A lot of drugs maybe, even, and hope for the best, because this is not normal.
I never even think for a second about outside world if I have to leave my house and people call me mentalcel, jfl. You're fucked up if you're in this state. No other way around. What you need is to get out of it asap. For me, I think, drugs did help... It's bad, but it is what it is.
Don't waste time on this, you're going to just dig a deeper hole for yourself...

 

[Deleted member 2214]

conversationless KH/KHHV. I dont even have a single female insta follower or facebook friend. In middleschool I was the class clown, Im kindof autistic so I tough people were laughing WITH me, but they were laughting AT me. People didnt see me as a sexual being - when I started crushing on one girl (ended up as my only rejection) everyone found it fucking hilarious - like when a little dog humps girls leg

I guess I must be overrating you in my head then. I don't have any social media aside from Whatsapp either, I can't related to that, but in that case, if you know you're not gonna get the full benefits of that social media, then what's the point of having it?

That sounds shitty tbh. I'm sorry you had to go through all that, but seriously, the descriptions i've read of you don't make it sound as if you're genuinely incel. Just not Chad.

And sadly, as of 2020, you can't pull off being non-NT as a sub-Chadlite/Chad depending on what your situation is, so my condolences. I can relate to that.

 

[Mongrelcel]

I guess I must be overrating you in my head then. I don't have any social media aside from Whatsapp either, I can't related to that, but in that case, if you know you're not gonna get the full benefits of that social media, then what's the point of having it?

That sounds shitty tbh. I'm sorry you had to go through all that, but seriously, the descriptions i've read of you don't make it sound as if you're genuinely incel. Just not Chad.

And sadly, as of 2020, you can't pull off being non-NT as a sub-Chadlite/Chad depending on what your situation is, so my condolences. I can relate to that.

I read that people that experience a traumatic event mentally distance themselves because they cant cope with it - im doing the exact same thing. I cant face the failure Ive experienced so far in my life. I hate every fauce of my being. My plan is to get surgery, get a new face, change country, and attempt to start my life over. But as things are going right now it doesent look like it will work out - I cant even commit to the first step of my plan which is making money. 0 hope for the future. Every day is exactly the same

 

[Deleted member 2214]

I read that people that experience a traumatic event mentally distance themselves because they cant cope with it - im doing the exact same thing. I cant face the failure Ive experienced so far in my life. I hate every fauce of my being. My plan is to get surgery, get a new face, change country, and attempt to start my life over. But as things are going right now it doesent look like it will work out - I cant even commit to the first step of my plan which is making money. 0 hope for the future. Every day is exactly the same

What do you work as (if you have a job)? Are you NEET with parents?

 

[Mongrelcel]

What do you work as (if you have a job)? Are you NEET with parents?

I consider myself a neet as I dont actually do anything all day - like I said my schoolwork is ridicolously easy (degree mill private uni - I dont even have any classmates). Yeah I live with my mother

 

[Deleted member 2214]

I consider myself a neet as I dont actually do anything all day - like I said my schoolwork is ridicolously easy (degree mill private uni - I dont even have any classmates). Yeah I live with my mother

Just get a simple job then if you're desperate enough right now. I plan to work at a pizza delivery place just outside my condo once I finish high school just as a spare job regardless of what I get so I can get easy extra money on the side.

 

[getra]

and yet noone actually overcame depression by lonely teenage years and no aspie here ever became NT

Ik how you feel I’m still going through that shit myself. That’s why I’m still doing some of my own research and looking through posts and advice. We’ve already lost most of our teen years but I don’t plan on losing even more. Hope you’re with me on that.

 

[Mongrelcel]

Ik how you feel I’m still going through that shit myself. That’s why I’m still doing some of my own research and looking through posts and advice. We’ve already lost most of our teen years but I don’t plan on losing even more. Hope you’re with me on that.

im 20 already, i would be maybe 23 or 24 until im looksmaxxed so my entire youth is basically gone