HumidVent
Mistral
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2020
- Posts
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I had a date today and held hands with a girl for the first time (without paying) however I'm not attracted to her at all.
I thought I would be fine taking any women I could get but then I started thinking about our future together and breaking her heart if she finds out I don't find her attractive.
I'm not a dishonest person so hiding the fact that I find her disgusting would haunt me for the rest of my life.
I'm conflicted, this is likely the only chance I have at a normal life. I'm already in my 30s and I've been depressed since I was 15. Finding a girl that's genuinely attracted to me is a 1 in a billion chance. And my family would be relieved and I won't be such a disappointment to them anymore.
I could spend my life with her and lie about finding her disgusting just for a chance at beating loneliness and living a normal life, or I can be honest with her and continue to use escorts for the rest of my life and suicide at some point.
Also she probably only held my hand out of pity, and my imagination is just going wild like most incels when they receive any type of female attention. She will likely ghost me and refuse to meet up for a second date jfl.
I thought I would be fine taking any women I could get but then I started thinking about our future together and breaking her heart if she finds out I don't find her attractive.
I'm not a dishonest person so hiding the fact that I find her disgusting would haunt me for the rest of my life.
I'm conflicted, this is likely the only chance I have at a normal life. I'm already in my 30s and I've been depressed since I was 15. Finding a girl that's genuinely attracted to me is a 1 in a billion chance. And my family would be relieved and I won't be such a disappointment to them anymore.
I could spend my life with her and lie about finding her disgusting just for a chance at beating loneliness and living a normal life, or I can be honest with her and continue to use escorts for the rest of my life and suicide at some point.
Also she probably only held my hand out of pity, and my imagination is just going wild like most incels when they receive any type of female attention. She will likely ghost me and refuse to meet up for a second date jfl.
