I need help

[lilrope]

I'm always on the verge of tears after seeing close friends. I have periods of introspections; wondering how the hell have I've managed to fuck my entire life up despite never having any self-jeopardizing tendencies. I was always a loser growing up. I was never invited to social gatherings, fraternities and even lunch tables at school, I always ate my lunch alone. Ascending didn't work. Puberty did save my ass to an extent(developed a god like jaw and grew to 6'1).
Becoming better looking did little to none for me. I'm 19 now and I'm at a place of inquisition and uncertainty, I do not know what the future holds for me. I live my life the 'conventionally correct' way. I'm getting vocational training, gymcelling, abstaining from taking recreational substances and never drinking. I am lost in a lonely monotonous existence, I honestly don't know what to do. To add insult to injury, I have no male figure in my life(no dad, no male siblings and no male relatives who I speak to on a regular basis).
What I feel literally exemplifies existential dread.
I need you faggots to tell me what the fuck I should do with my life

 

[Deleted member 27066]

Rope

 

[lilrope]

Rope

I'm good lookibg and I come from a rich family. The said glimmer of hope holds me back from roping

 

[Deleted member 4209]

ur gl stop complaining

 

[lilrope]

ur gl stop complaining

but my life's been fucked

 

[Dr. Bludy]

Boohoo

Cry me a river you are tall and rich
Stfu and put the work in

 

[lonelycurry]

please consider suicide

 

[JovenCansao]

Average male life, don't worry too much, it probably won't get better but you'll get used to it

 

[Deleted member 23819]

I'm always on the verge of tears after seeing close friends. I have periods of introspections; wondering how the hell have I've managed to fuck my entire life up despite never having any self-jeopardizing tendencies. I was always a loser growing up. I was never invited to social gatherings, fraternities and even lunch tables at school, I always ate my lunch alone. Ascending didn't work. Puberty did save my ass to an extent(developed a god like jaw and grew to 6'1).
Becoming better looking did little to none for me. I'm 19 now and I'm at a place of inquisition and uncertainty, I do not know what the future holds for me. I live my life the 'conventionally correct' way. I'm getting vocational training, gymcelling, abstaining from taking recreational substances and never drinking. I am lost in a lonely monotonous existence, I honestly don't know what to do. To add insult to injury, I have no male figure in my life(no dad, no male siblings and no male relatives who I speak to on a regular basis).
What I feel literally exemplifies existential dread.
I need you faggots to tell me what the fuck I should do with my life

Go travel alone to East Asia or South America for a few months, depending on what type of girls you find attractive. You need adventure/dopamine, and putting yourself out there in a completely new place, meeting new girls and all that should help.