MoggsWithBoness
Anti-vegan
- Joined
- Oct 6, 2023
- Posts
- 1,995
- Reputation
- 1,540
The blackpill was both a curse and a blessing to me. I found out what my facial flaws actually are, found my facial score. I found out that some things I was insecure about, Like having a wide square jaw and a compact face instead of a long one and having hooded eyes (Lacking an upper eyelid when Im not mongoloid used to be frustrating). The blackpill made me realise how good all of this was and also made me realise my flaws, like my nose and chin. Yes it surely was a blessing. I realised that I need to fix my overbite or it might ruin my life, and that I might require a rhinoplasty in future. But you know how it turned into a curse, because now I cant stop giving a fuck about myself and my looks. I miss the days of being chill, just taking a fast shower and rushing to school without doing skincare and this and that before going to school. I just realised how fucked my life has become. I look in the mirror 50-60 times a day. I cannot stop thinking about certain things about my face. I keep measuring my height legit daily thinking it will change this fast, then go into depression about how Ive only grown from 177cm to 180cm in the past 6 months and that my growth plates might be closed and that I need to commit suicide cuz Im a 5'11 manlet. Im going autistic over everything and I cannot socialise with people anymore without discussing facial aesthetics or height or frame. Whenever I go out all Im doing is judging other people, with ITV's voice playing in my head. I sometimes think that Im a psl god that is unmoggable and at other times I will think that Im ugly and my girlfriend is pity dating me and I will end up in dead bedrooms subreddit or some shit before she divorces me because she isnt attracted to me. All of this bs in my head cannot be stopped. I cannot even go off this forum cuz now I know the truth of this world, and I cannot see it the same again. I miss the old days man, I miss them. When I was happy with being a fat kid didnt even bother washing my face, and all I would do was go to school, play tic tac toe with random guys and study for namesake, get back home and watch a hell lot of TV, then go out to play random shit with my friends running around, not giving a fuck about anyone or anything man.