idk if imma kms

[marrone911]

im 16 and thinking about suicide since 9. in the year of 2022/2023 i was at my lowest (at least what i tought) i didnt go to school, i hated myself(still do) i wanted to end it but i wasnt brave enough, instead i was punching myself in the face whenerver i was angry, i was failing school and one time i didnt do the physic's homewok i felt so bad cus it was my passion and i couldnt even get off the bed so i punched myself and i bleed out my nose. in total in 270 days of school ive made 90 absence(the max is 50) so i fail that year but still couldn't end it, for 2 months straight i was rotting in my bed, however in summer ive met this girl who liked me first and did the first move(she straight up kissed me) i dont have any social skill whatsoever so i was crining sharing my emotions and shi, after a month i decided to end the relationship cus, yea she did bad things but i wasnt enough good for a boyfriend this was my obly expirience with a girl not cus i dont have opportunity but i dont have the social skill for a relationship, i hate myself for this but this reltionship gave me hope for something.
the year 2023/2024 was the cameback i was in the prime school my grades were very good even if i didnt study that much my mood was great my older brother cameback after being 1 year in study trip and life was starting to feel right again(in this year i discover looksmax bp etc... but i didnt care too much) my summer was okay i talked with some grils but i didnt wanted relationships to complicates thing formy social skills.
the year 2024/2025 since september i was fearing that this year would have been the same thing as 2022/2023 but i didnt speak about it with no one, i almost failed this year not for the grades, even if they werent very good in some subject but for the absence wich were 49, in this year i started too realized even more about looks and height unluckly im 5'6/5'7 whit a chopped face but this year was stressfull not only for that but even cus i got psychosis for my first and only j i felt nothing was real i took some razor blades and stare at em, cus if im gonna cut i dont wanna have consequens i want a clean cut so i wouldnt have to go to some hospital and shi, i also tough about hanging myself but i didnt even know where to tie the rope, with summer i tought the bad mood would somehow go away, guess what now its worse in the last month i realized my life its a fucking misery not only for other thing but my looks and height everyone around me is treathing me without respect just cus im short and my fuvking face is so goddamn asymetric i cant take no more picture i cant look at it i look like chud but with an asymetric face i genuanly dont even wanna go out with my friends cus im fucking disgusting and short my nose is fucking big and i got a flat ass maxilla my left eye is down turned i dont wanna take picture but i cant tell my friends cus i will look like a pic me but i only hate myself not only for my overall looks but i failed my school i cant do anything on time i just wanna die without knowing it, and today i was on disc and two guys called me chopped i didnt care at first but the they started laughing like i was an a fucking experiment, overall my life rn its 80% suffering 10% ''i cant do it'' 5% of existing and 5% somewhat not sad but not happy i jus dont know why i cant be brave enough to just make this decision. I never talked about my problems with anyone i was just to embarased sharing my emotion but here is much simple

if i said anything i wanted to say in case imma modify anyway i really dont know its just usless even trying im just existing with an active part of suffering
if i/ve made some typo is cus english is not my firts language and i didnt use traslatore wanted to use my words as far i know english
idk how but if u can help me in anyway i be thankful

 

[idkmanimao]

im 16 and thinking about suicide since 9. in the year of 2022/2023 i was at my lowest (at least what i tought) i didnt go to school, i hated myself(still do) i wanted to end it but i wasnt brave enough, instead i was punching myself in the face whenerver i was angry, i was failing school and one time i didnt do the physic's homewok i felt so bad cus it was my passion and i couldnt even get off the bed so i punched myself and i bleed out my nose. in total in 270 days of school ive made 90 absence(the max is 50) so i fail that year but still couldn't end it, for 2 months straight i was rotting in my bed, however in summer ive met this girl who liked me first and did the first move(she straight up kissed me) i dont have any social skill whatsoever so i was crining sharing my emotions and shi, after a month i decided to end the relationship cus, yea she did bad things but i wasnt enough good for a boyfriend this was my obly expirience with a girl not cus i dont have opportunity but i dont have the social skill for a relationship, i hate myself for this but this reltionship gave me hope for something.
the year 2023/2024 was the cameback i was in the prime school my grades were very good even if i didnt study that much my mood was great my older brother cameback after being 1 year in study trip and life was starting to feel right again(in this year i discover looksmax bp etc... but i didnt care too much) my summer was okay i talked with some grils but i didnt wanted relationships to complicates thing formy social skills.
the year 2024/2025 since september i was fearing that this year would have been the same thing as 2022/2023 but i didnt speak about it with no one, i almost failed this year not for the grades, even if they werent very good in some subject but for the absence wich were 49, in this year i started too realized even more about looks and height unluckly im 5'6/5'7 whit a chopped face but this year was stressfull not only for that but even cus i got psychosis for my first and only j i felt nothing was real i took some razor blades and stare at em, cus if im gonna cut i dont wanna have consequens i want a clean cut so i wouldnt have to go to some hospital and shi, i also tough about hanging myself but i didnt even know where to tie the rope, with summer i tought the bad mood would somehow go away, guess what now its worse in the last month i realized my life its a fucking misery not only for other thing but my looks and height everyone around me is treathing me without respect just cus im short and my fuvking face is so goddamn asymetric i cant take no more picture i cant look at it i look like chud but with an asymetric face i genuanly dont even wanna go out with my friends cus im fucking disgusting and short my nose is fucking big and i got a flat ass maxilla my left eye is down turned i dont wanna take picture but i cant tell my friends cus i will look like a pic me but i only hate myself not only for my overall looks but i failed my school i cant do anything on time i just wanna die without knowing it, and today i was on disc and two guys called me chopped i didnt care at first but the they started laughing like i was an a fucking experiment, overall my life rn its 80% suffering 10% ''i cant do it'' 5% of existing and 5% somewhat not sad but not happy i jus dont know why i cant be brave enough to just make this decision. I never talked about my problems with anyone i was just to embarased sharing my emotion but here is much simple

if i said anything i wanted to say in case imma modify anyway i really dont know its just usless even trying im just existing with an active part of suffering
if i/ve made some typo is cus english is not my firts language and i didnt use traslatore wanted to use my words as far i know english
idk how but if u can help me in anyway i be thankful

this won't last forever, just focus on improving and not caring about other think, the more you care, the worst it's going to affect you.

 

[Bryce]

If you're gonna kill yourself at least format your suicide note, shits putting me to sleep brah

 

[marrone911]

this won't last forever, just focus on improving and not caring about other think, the more you care, the worst it's going to affect you.

its not only the other pepole the problem is myself from the inside to outside and is not getting better

 

[marrone911]

If you're gonna kill yourself at least format your suicide note, shits putting me to sleep brah

i know i've tried to summarize the last years with some expirience and if imma kms i aint leaving no note

 

[cwoolton]

im 16 and thinking about suicide since 9. in the year of 2022/2023 i was at my lowest (at least what i tought) i didnt go to school, i hated myself(still do) i wanted to end it but i wasnt brave enough, instead i was punching myself in the face whenerver i was angry, i was failing school and one time i didnt do the physic's homewok i felt so bad cus it was my passion and i couldnt even get off the bed so i punched myself and i bleed out my nose. in total in 270 days of school ive made 90 absence(the max is 50) so i fail that year but still couldn't end it, for 2 months straight i was rotting in my bed, however in summer ive met this girl who liked me first and did the first move(she straight up kissed me) i dont have any social skill whatsoever so i was crining sharing my emotions and shi, after a month i decided to end the relationship cus, yea she did bad things but i wasnt enough good for a boyfriend this was my obly expirience with a girl not cus i dont have opportunity but i dont have the social skill for a relationship, i hate myself for this but this reltionship gave me hope for something.
the year 2023/2024 was the cameback i was in the prime school my grades were very good even if i didnt study that much my mood was great my older brother cameback after being 1 year in study trip and life was starting to feel right again(in this year i discover looksmax bp etc... but i didnt care too much) my summer was okay i talked with some grils but i didnt wanted relationships to complicates thing formy social skills.
the year 2024/2025 since september i was fearing that this year would have been the same thing as 2022/2023 but i didnt speak about it with no one, i almost failed this year not for the grades, even if they werent very good in some subject but for the absence wich were 49, in this year i started too realized even more about looks and height unluckly im 5'6/5'7 whit a chopped face but this year was stressfull not only for that but even cus i got psychosis for my first and only j i felt nothing was real i took some razor blades and stare at em, cus if im gonna cut i dont wanna have consequens i want a clean cut so i wouldnt have to go to some hospital and shi, i also tough about hanging myself but i didnt even know where to tie the rope, with summer i tought the bad mood would somehow go away, guess what now its worse in the last month i realized my life its a fucking misery not only for other thing but my looks and height everyone around me is treathing me without respect just cus im short and my fuvking face is so goddamn asymetric i cant take no more picture i cant look at it i look like chud but with an asymetric face i genuanly dont even wanna go out with my friends cus im fucking disgusting and short my nose is fucking big and i got a flat ass maxilla my left eye is down turned i dont wanna take picture but i cant tell my friends cus i will look like a pic me but i only hate myself not only for my overall looks but i failed my school i cant do anything on time i just wanna die without knowing it, and today i was on disc and two guys called me chopped i didnt care at first but the they started laughing like i was an a fucking experiment, overall my life rn its 80% suffering 10% ''i cant do it'' 5% of existing and 5% somewhat not sad but not happy i jus dont know why i cant be brave enough to just make this decision. I never talked about my problems with anyone i was just to embarased sharing my emotion but here is much simple

if i said anything i wanted to say in case imma modify anyway i really dont know its just usless even trying im just existing with an active part of suffering
if i/ve made some typo is cus english is not my firts language and i didnt use traslatore wanted to use my words as far i know english
idk how but if u can help me in anyway i be thank

Dnr but dont do it bro

 

[loLyric]

post wyll, its normal for people to underrate themselves, or dm me a pic and I'll tell u if ur actually chopped.

brutal height but ur still taller than lots of asian countries+5'8 at 16 maybe u can get 5'9 or 5'10. Personally if I was you I would check if my growth plates were open and start hgh asap.