in an alternate universe i have her

[futureashtray]

in an alternate universe i was born with wealth

wealth in everything
my body, my face, my flesh is gold

a face everyone loves, not just my mother

where i am the child of a wealthy father, a tall father, a confident and charismatic father.

where everything in life is handed to me in a silver platter, where im born with the physique of gods, the face of an angel, where i am beautiful.

in an alternate universe i am Chris Henry or Jalen Duren

someone tall, handsome, athletic, charismatic, funny.

but no, I burdened with this fucked body. Burdened with flaws everywhere. a fucked maxilla, a fucked jaw, fucked face, fucked body, fucked everything

terrible posture, hideous face, suck at socializing, suck at it all

i see winners winning everyday all day when they should be losing, winners who win and keep winning and they know it and put down the losers

i hate myself, if i weren’t so ugly i would be talking to that girl that i admire so much. i would be making her laugh, making her have a good time, being there for her, being with her, actually living life instead of just existing. fuck man fuck.

she’s so beautiful, i wish i talked to her when i had the chance, now she’s gone forever. she will leave and go start her career in the military in october, she will start basic training

i would admire her, i took her presence for granted, and when i realized that i would no longer have the privilege to admire her beauty it was already too late

i have been deprived of a basic human’s needs. my body is selfish by nature so it would rather suffer but survive than to prioritize anything else

she is gone man, i don’t deserve her anyway. im so fucking ugly man. so fucking ugly.

 

[Bryce]