It got me dying tbh

[IWantToMax]

I went out to dance W my friends.
Got told by them that girls escape from me because I Am too exalted when in presence of a specific friend of mine.


I am too scared to face the truth.

I am a subhuman and I'm going to rope to be honest.


I can't interact with girls, I can dance with guys only for some reason I don't know

 

[Deleted member 3043]

stop overthinking

 

[Gengar]

stop overthinking

 

[Deleted member 3702]

vit D bro

 

[Deleted member 2227]

Because they are your friends? is much more easy to a male talk and got fun with other males than with girls that you don't even know who are, also, the why they escape of you is because of your ugly face.

 

[IWantToMax]

vit D bro

Vit d doesn't change anything, I'm tooo scared to even look at girls

Because they are your friends? is much more easy to a male talk and got fun with other males than with girls that you don't even know who are, also, the why they escape of you is because of your ugly face.

I imagine it's due to that.
I don't even know how to interact, but in the end out of all the friends out with me, none got anything tbh
I want to die rn
Please i need someone to kill me
I cant take this shit anymore.

I am disabled in all senses
How can I take it anymore.

I'm a piece of shit.

 

[Deleted member 2227]

I imagine it's due to that.
I don't even know how to interact, but in the end out of all the friends out with me, none got anything tbh
I want to die rn
Please i need someone to kill me
I cant take this shit anymore.

I am disabled in all senses
How can I take it anymore.

I'm a piece of shit.

Try drugs first, if nothing happens so it's over.

 

[IWantToMax]

Update:

I went out with my friends.
Before heading out i looked into the mirror, and felt gl, as almost always, when at home.

I went to a place with my friends, and we smoked some weed.

Got in a good mood overall.

We started going in different bars, until we eventually got kind-of drunk.

We then went to a disco, where we started dancing and having fun.


I personally dance just for fun, not for picking up girls, although I'd like to be able to pick them up, as I need some validation.

I was in a group of mentalcels, none has ever kissed a girl, and were all over 18.
(we all frequent a school with pretty much 0 girls, although I had some girls I don't know type me through IG dms).

We danced for hours I was probably the only one who had fun (I love music, and I produce music). I danced like Zyzz the whole time.

I was feeling good.

The we went out to get some air and my friends told me girls escaped from me because I dances like I was on heavy drugs, like I was on crack when I was around some friends of mine (I screamed and jumped around when friends of mine were around).

It was like feeling a stab into my back tbh.

I felt like it was my looks killing me.
I don't know what the truth is.

I then went to the bathroom, as I had to take a piss, to just see the truth reflected on a mirror.
I felt like shit. I looked like shit.

I don't know.
When I'm outside of my house I look like shit.
At home I feel model tier.
Outside I feel really bad.

I wish I was normal.

I am a mentalcel to be honest, I can't even look at girls, nor dance with them.
I can with guys I don't know though, for some reason even when drunk.

All I can say is that I feel so fucking bad right now.
I don't know what's wrong with me.
I've been doing everything in my possibilities to be normal, to act like a NT person, but I just can't.
I wish I didn't know the blackpill, as It makes me based, and makes me acknowledge that the main reason why girls act like shit towards me is my looks, not my behavior.

On the other hand the blackpill is the strongest cope ever, it made me look thousand times better, I feel atleast.

Just needed to let it out to be honest.

It's like my 10th time in a club, and I haven't even danced, nor approached a girl yet.
(had a girls twerk on me, and a girl grab my ass, but I am too autistic to do anything. When it happens I just close my eyes and just dream)

 

[Butthurt Dweller]

Didnt read any of this sunday newspaper

 

[IWantToMax]

Didnt read any of this sunday newspaper

This got me dying tbh

Didnt read any of this sunday newspaper

I don't care about your opinion, I just had to let it out.

stop overthinking

I wish it was that easy.

I can't move, I can't do anything.
I'm physically impaired.

I'm disabled.

Something kills me, let it be looks of neurotypicity.
Honesty it doesn't matter.

If I were normal I'd be getting some good feedbacks here and there.

I don't get as much as I want.
And even if I were to get then, what would I do? Nothing, because I wouldn't know how to repsond.

I hate myself for choosing to go in an all male school.

It litterally made me an unstable guy.

It litterally killed all my opportunities with girls.

In my whole life I've been friends with 1 girl.
One fucking girl.

I've talked to one girl in 18 years, almost 19.

At primary school we were divided in groups (males/females)
In secondary school I felt ashamed of liking girls.
In high school, I've had 5 girls classmates in 5 years, and have been friends to one only.

Try drugs first, if nothing happens so it's over.

Tried weed.
Doesn't make me more confident. Still can't look girls in the eyes nor dance with them.

Tried getting drunk. That's the same as if I were sober with girls.

I am more nt around guys, but I have block with girls.

I need to become some sort of God to get something out of my life, because I'm useless right now.

 

[RAITEIII]

Vit d doesn't change anything, I'm tooo scared to even look at girls

I imagine it's due to that.
I don't even know how to interact, but in the end out of all the friends out with me, none got anything tbh
I want to die rn
Please i need someone to kill me
I cant take this shit anymore.

I am disabled in all senses
How can I take it anymore.

I'm a piece of shit.

You have to relax bud.
We are in the same boat when it comes to these things.

I want to tell you that two years ago I was considered "GL", still everytime I went out and looked at a mirror I'd see something atrocious. Just like me back then, you probably look better than what you thought you did at that moment you went to the bathroom.

I know people will overlook certain things if you are good looking but till a certain point too, I honestly have no way to know if you exceeded that line.

You yourself said it, you were dancing for fun, not to pick up girls, be it you, me or Chico we cannot cross the line and act too silly lol.

Again I don't know what you did there for them to think "you were on crack" but most likely we'd do what the girls did if we thought someone was acting like that.

I am sorry your night turned out this way, hope you feel better boyo.

 

[IWantToMax]

Because they are your friends? is much more easy to a male talk and got fun with other males than with girls that you don't even know who are, also, the why they escape of you is because of your ugly face.

This is Based.
But you're not taking into account I am mentally fucked, and I had some girls I don't know type me on Ig (I know 0 girls irl)

I personally think the problem is more like mental. But I don't feel good with my looks either. Just sometimes, when I'm alone, I feel good about myself looks wise.

 

[RAITEIII]

BTW @Butthurt Dweller you need to learn to identify when the dn read joke is funny. In this case you just better fuck off

 

[Gengar]

I don't know.
When I'm outside of my house I look like shit.
At home I feel model tier.
Outside I feel really bad.

i relate so much to this except instead of model-tier i think decent-looking

 

[IWantToMax]

You have to relax bud.
We are in the same boat when it comes to these things.

I want to tell you that two years ago I was considered "GL", still everytime I went out and looked at a mirror I'd see something atrocious. Just like me back then, you probably look better than what you thought you did at that moment you went to the bathroom.

I know people will overlook certain things if you are good looking but till a certain point too, I honestly have no way to know if you exceeded that line.

You yourself said it, you were dancing for fun, not to pick up girls, be it you, me or Chico we cannot cross the line and act too silly lol.

Again I don't know what you did there for them to think "you were on crack" but most likely we'd do what the girls did if we thought someone was acting like that.

I am sorry your night turned out this way, hope you feel better boyo.

Thanks man. I personally don't know what I did wrong to look like on crack
I was personally just having fun, dancing kind of like Zyzz (I look up to him, and love the same genres as him), instead of going for regular club dance moves.

I didnt feel silly at all to be honest. I was just dancing ad screaming with some friends that's all

 

[Butthurt Dweller]

BTW @Butthurt Dweller you need to learn to identify when the dn read joke is funny. In this case you just better fuck off

Twink tears are ambrosia to me.

 

[IWantToMax]

Twink tears are ambrosia to me.

I'm going to be honest: It's not funny

 

[Dogs]

That sucks bro. Ded srs it's probably face unfortunately.

 

[IWantToMax]

That sucks bro. Ded srs it's probably face unfortunately.

I'd rather die if that's the case

 

[Dogs]

I'd rather die if that's the case

I'm in the same boat as you man, you can improve it.

 

[IWantToMax]

I'm in the same boat as you man, you can improve it.

No I can't improve it.
I'm doing every fucking singles thing I could be doing to be normal.

I double dare to find someone who is doing more than me to looks better. I litterally spend 5/6 hours a day to look better

I so try to beclme nt by doing stupid shit like eating broccoli and stuff like That, but nothing changes tbh

 

[Dogs]

No I can't improve it.
I'm doing every fucking singles thing I could be doing to be normal.

I double dare to find someone who is doing more than me to looks better. I litterally spend 5/6 hours a day to look better

I so try to beclme nt by doing stupid shit like eating broccoli and stuff like That, but nothing changes tbh

What are you doing to improve your looks? There's absolutely no regime I can imagine that you can spend 5/6 hours to improve your looks.

 

[IWantToMax]

What are you doing to improve your looks? There's absolutely no regime I can imagine that you can spend 5/6 hours to improve your looks.

Chewing 1 hour
Working out 2/3 hours (depends on the day)
Eating 160g broccoli 30 minutes
Stretching 30 minutes
Exfoliating, looking in the mirror, and other stupid shit 1 hour

On top of that I'm also taking supplements.

 

[Dogs]

Chewing 1 hour
Working out 2/3 hours (depends on the day)
Eating 160g broccoli 30 minutes
Stretching 30 minutes
Exfoliating, looking in the mirror, and other stupid shit 1 hour

On top of that I'm also taking supplements.

Most this shit is cope. Broccoli cope, exfoliating cope (you shouldn't exfoliate everyday anyways), stretching cope

You need to figure out what's wrong with your face and fix it. Maybe you need surgery maybe you don't. I need 40k worth of surgery.

 

[IWantToMax]

Most this shit is cope. Broccoli cope, exfoliating cope (you shouldn't exfoliate everyday anyways), stretching cope

You need to figure out what's wrong with your face and fix it. Maybe you need surgery maybe you don't. I need 40k worth of surgery.

Stretching is not cope. I need to to it to avoid problems with my shoulder girdle (Didn't move arms for a year due to sc joint instability, and got shoulder problems, thT seems to be fixed by now tbh)
I exfoliate only when needed, but I definitely spend a lot of time analyzing myself in the mirror, and I swear to fucking God..
When I am at home I feel really good looking from the front.

I see a wide evident jawline, kind of hollow cheeks, good cheekbones, ogee curve, prominent browridge, low uee, no scleral show, masculine eyes.

But when I head out my perception changes whdn I see myself in the mirror.

Most this shit is cope. Broccoli cope, exfoliating cope (you shouldn't exfoliate everyday anyways), stretching cope

You need to figure out what's wrong with your face and fix it. Maybe you need surgery maybe you don't. I need 40k worth of surgery.

Also broccoli might be cope, but I don't want to stop eating them, even if there's the 0.0001 percent of chance of becoming nt

 

[RAITEIII]

What are you doing to improve your looks? There's absolutely no regime I can imagine that you can spend 5/6 hours to improve your looks.

1 hour infrared light therapy.
2 hours working out
1 hour if I need certain stuff injected
30 minutes skin care routine
Jelqing

And we can go on. There are things I don't do everyday or others that have never because I either don't have the money or time to do them.

That's why sometimes I think that looksmaxing in certain ways and having a healthy life style is not compatible

 

[Dogs]

You stretching cause you had an injury. That's not a looksmax. Exfoliating takes 1 minute.

I also think I look ok in the mirror but I need surgeries bro. At home looking at yourself you get used to your flaws or halos and it can warp how you really look.

Maybe you have bdd, you were just dancing like a crazy person that sucks at dancing and your face is good bro.

I haven't heard of broccoli fixing ntness tbh

 

[RAITEIII]

1 hour infrared light therapy.
2 hours working out
1 hour if I need certain stuff injected
30 minutes skin care routine
Jelqing

And we can go on. There are things I don't do everyday or others that have never because I either don't have the money or time to do them.

That's why sometimes I think that looksmaxing in certain ways and having a healthy life style is not compatible

Also I need work my ass off researching stuff for more things I need to do, preparing certain meals, supplements and so on.

If I go out with someone I can barely do anything lol

 

[IWantToMax]

1 hour infrared light therapy.
2 hours working out
1 hour if I need certain stuff injected
30 minutes skin care routine
Jelqing

And we can go on. There are things I don't do everyday or others that have never because I either don't have the money or time to do them.

That's why sometimes I think that looksmaxing in certain ways and having a healthy life style is not compatible

I'd jelq aswell if I didn't leave with my parents.
Looksmaxing takes a lot of time

You stretching cause you had an injury. That's not a looksmax. Exfoliating takes 1 minute.

I also think I look ok in the mirror but I need surgeries bro. At home looking at yourself you get used to your flaws or halos and it can warp how you really look.

Maybe you have bdd, you were just dancing like a crazy person that sucks at dancing and your face is good bro.

I haven't heard of broccoli fixing ntness tbh

That's a looksmax because it allows me to weight trains and get a nice physiaue

 

[Dogs]

1 hour infrared light therapy.
2 hours working out
1 hour if I need certain stuff injected
30 minutes skin care routine
Jelqing

And we can go on. There are things I don't do everyday or others that have never because I either don't have the money or time to do them.

That's why sometimes I think that looksmaxing in certain ways and having a healthy life style is not compatible

I doubt most people's routines are this hardcore. How long have you been doing red light and where did you get the leds?

 

[IWantToMax]

You stretching cause you had an injury. That's not a looksmax. Exfoliating takes 1 minute.

I also think I look ok in the mirror but I need surgeries bro. At home looking at yourself you get used to your flaws or halos and it can warp how you really look.

Maybe you have bdd, you were just dancing like a crazy person that sucks at dancing and your face is good bro.

I haven't heard of broccoli fixing ntness tbh

Other time I went to dance Ive been told by a girl that I was good at dancing.

I didnt really do anything different today.

 

[Dogs]

Other time I went to dance Ive been told by a girl that I was good at dancing.

I didnt really do anything different today.

That girl liked your face the others didn't. I dunno man.

 

[IWantToMax]

That girl liked your face the others didn't. I dunno man.

It was my friends telling me I looked on coke or some shit, not some girl.

But I definitely didn't do anything different front that other day.

I Will try to learn muzzing more in depth, but idk tbh what the fuck was wrong with me.

 

[RAITEIII]

I doubt most people's routines are this hardcore. How long have you been doing red light and where did you get the leds?

Honestly I've just bought my device a few days ago. You can get them on Amazon, there're threads here (that's why I got motivated in the first place).

It should be more hardcore but as of now it's all I can do without copes on my way despite taking much time.
If I had more money I could do things in less time and get better results...

@Dogs what about your looksmaxxing routine?

 

[MicroPenis]

1 hour infrared light therapy.
2 hours working out
1 hour if I need certain stuff injected
30 minutes skin care routine
Jelqing

And we can go on. There are things I don't do everyday or others that have never because I either don't have the money or time to do them.

That's why sometimes I think that looksmaxing in certain ways and having a healthy life style is not compatible

that stuff is all cope right there not to mention thats like 5 hours a day you could be spending making money or socializing to actually improve your standing wasted on autistic shit.

save some time get some retin-a and put it on in 2 minutes. get a professional skin treatment once a month with all the money you made not wasting 5 hours a day or save money for surgery by working or making money with those 5 hours.

if you're bdd is too bad to leave the basement for those 5 hours seek help

these types of things are mega-cope even making a facepulling device would be time better spent

 

[RAITEIII]

@IWantToMax eating brocolli to nt when you yourself have tested it does not work will only lead to frustration.

@MicroPenis Thanks for your advice. I agree that there are things with more effectiveness and would take less time but I am not able to do them right now.

Although my post does not look like it, I do try to moneymaxx the best way I can, the best way I know. I should start college soon and the time I have will be less.

Lately I've been trying to socialize, heck I'm even kinda dating. But the fact that on the first day I was told to be "so cute" and two days ago Im told that "my face changes a lot" worries me. I know when I look decent and when I follow those things for a reasonable amount of days I get better results... And people tell me without asking. Of course I don't like spending that time but it's not like I have a choice...

It's late and I can't think pruiperly

 

[fukmylyf]

it iz what it iz

 

[IWantToMax]

it iz what it iz

It is.
Over.

 

[Over]

When I am at home I feel really good looking from the front.

I see a wide evident jawline, kind of hollow cheeks, good cheekbones, ogee curve, prominent browridge, low uee, no scleral show, masculine eyes.

But when I head out my perception changes whdn I see myself in the mirror.

This sounds similar to me. I also sometimes think I look decent in my mirror but after i go out and see myself in clothing shop's mirrors then my day is ruined.

I think you should get pills from psychiatrist.

 

[IWantToMax]

This sounds similar to me. I also sometimes think I look decent in my mirror but after i go out and see myself in clothing shop's mirrors then my day is ruined.

I think you should get pills from psychiatrist.

I'm not going to take pills, as they would get me even more fucked up than I am right now.

How do you cope with this?

 

[Over]

How do you cope with this?

I cope with knowing that there is a possibility that all of this bullshit is just in our head. I reappointed to psychiatrist for next week and will try pills, you can't go more fucked up than delusional bdd where you think your looks changes. Pills might be the only chance to fix chemistry in our brains.

 

[RAITEIII]

I cope with knowing that there is a possibility that all of this bullshit is just in our head. I reappointed to psychiatrist for next week and will try pills, you can't go more fucked up than delusional bdd where you think your looks changes. Pills might be the only chance to fix chemistry in our brains.

I'll be looking forward your updates!