Mitakaa1341
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- Mar 25, 2025
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Last year, I used to DM this girl who would slide into my DMs constantly, like all day, every day. We’d talk about politics, drama, and our personal lives. If I sent one message, she’d send 5–10 back, blowing up my DMs. She’d spend a lot of time messaging me before bed, and I’d wake up to her long list of messages. It was nice having someone who gave me that much attention. It felt like I was loved, and I did love her back because of that. I could feel in my heart that I was in love.
This was even before she had shown me her face. When she finally did, she was kind of mid-looking, like low-mid LTB but I still loved her.
Things went bad when I started lying to her. I pretended that one of her friends leaked information about me just to stir up drama for my own amusement. I also leaked what she said to me to other people and bragged about it. She got mad and started giving shorter, blunt replies. I could tell she wanted me to apologize and maybe FaceTime her, but I didn’t want to because my face was bloated at the time. She wanted me to push the relationship further and make amends, but I couldn’t do that because I was lazy and full of ego, so we grew apart.
We stopped messaging, and then one time I accidentally sent her a screenshot from another chat while I was still in her DM thread. It was the most ridiculous screenshot ever, and she just responded with “lol?” After that, I deleted my account.
It’s been about six months since I last spoke to her. I can’t remember the fire I once had for her, it’s gone. I don’t know what love feels like anymore, I can’t remember it. It reminds me of "White Nights" by Dostoevsky, MC was an incel who fell in love with one girl and was fine when she left him for a “Chad,” because he was grateful to be left with the memory of love. But for me, at least, love is forgetful/fleeting.
This was even before she had shown me her face. When she finally did, she was kind of mid-looking, like low-mid LTB but I still loved her.
Things went bad when I started lying to her. I pretended that one of her friends leaked information about me just to stir up drama for my own amusement. I also leaked what she said to me to other people and bragged about it. She got mad and started giving shorter, blunt replies. I could tell she wanted me to apologize and maybe FaceTime her, but I didn’t want to because my face was bloated at the time. She wanted me to push the relationship further and make amends, but I couldn’t do that because I was lazy and full of ego, so we grew apart.
We stopped messaging, and then one time I accidentally sent her a screenshot from another chat while I was still in her DM thread. It was the most ridiculous screenshot ever, and she just responded with “lol?” After that, I deleted my account.
It’s been about six months since I last spoke to her. I can’t remember the fire I once had for her, it’s gone. I don’t know what love feels like anymore, I can’t remember it. It reminds me of "White Nights" by Dostoevsky, MC was an incel who fell in love with one girl and was fine when she left him for a “Chad,” because he was grateful to be left with the memory of love. But for me, at least, love is forgetful/fleeting.
