D
Deleted member 26448
Master
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2023
- Posts
- 1,523
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So, I met this girl that lives close to me on Instagram, after commenting on a post on her hobby account, basically saying that I really enjoyed it, and that it inspired me to actually go back to said hobby again (it was one that I used to do years ago). She messages me the next night, and tells me it meant so much to her, and that it raised her esteem. She then proceeded to follow me on my hobby account, and commented on my post, saying she loved it. I decided to write her a multi-page essay about what I actually appreciated about her work, after two weeks of kicking myself for not saying what I should have said, and then proceeded to post it on my account, and send it to her through direct messages. She responds, thanking me for the post and for being there for her, and then says that she read it again, and it "hit her harder the second time", and that we should be friends. She then tells me she wants to follow me on her personal account so she can see everything I post, which she proceeded to do.
We started talking back and forth, about personal stuff. She asked me what I did for work, and we both talked about our jobs. She inquired about my age, and my grade, which then brought a conversation where we talked about our post high school plans. However, the conversation died out after about two days. I revived it by simply asking her how her day was, where we then proceeded to talk about school again. I finally asked her if she lived locally to me (I had a feeling that she did, but didn't exactly remember how close she was), and she told me she did live close to me, in fact, she googled the distance between our towns. She told me a bit about her town, and told me about some things to do there. I was getting a bit low inhibition at this point, thinking I had it all dialed in. So, I started posting photos of myself more often. Now, I actually already had a post with my face up, a post about my body dysmorphia, in fact, a post where I specifically mentioned my past of bone-smashing, a post that she actually liked! So, I figured it wouldn't be a problem. She even followed my personal account, which I legit had just made the night before. She was my first follower. I really thought I couldn't lose.
Well, I guess it was a pretty big problem, because she decided to COMPLETELY ignore the text I sent her on Wednesday, asking her to tell me about her day.
Are you serious? YOU messaged me first. YOU wanted to be friends with me. YOU were the one who decided to message me on your personal account. Now, you ignore me? I see her posting on another app, deleting the posts that barely get any attention. Is that more important than me? I don't get it, man. I'm not trying to be needy, but YOU wanted to be friends with ME. And then you just ignore me? Baffling. The fact is, once again, my subhumanity completely RUINED my chances at escaping this hell.
WHY DID I HAVE TO BE BORN SO UGLY? WHY DID I HAVE TO BE BORN AS A MAN, WITH A PENIS AND TESTICLES? I don't get it. I want to die, to be honest. I mean, it is completely over. There is nothing I can do to change my looks, looksmaxxing will barely change the fact that I am a subhuman piece of shit. I can't even MAKE FRIENDS because of my looks! I am so ugly that people don't even want to speak with me. The fact that I haven't roped yet is a testament to how strong I am, because I can guarantee the majority of incels would have roped because of this. But me? No. I continue on living, for some odd reason. I really don't understand why I still try. There is seriously no way I will ever be able to live the life I want to live, and it is all because I was born an incel, born the ugliest, most subhuman looking "human" being on the planet.
It is legitimately over for me. How can I ever recover?
We started talking back and forth, about personal stuff. She asked me what I did for work, and we both talked about our jobs. She inquired about my age, and my grade, which then brought a conversation where we talked about our post high school plans. However, the conversation died out after about two days. I revived it by simply asking her how her day was, where we then proceeded to talk about school again. I finally asked her if she lived locally to me (I had a feeling that she did, but didn't exactly remember how close she was), and she told me she did live close to me, in fact, she googled the distance between our towns. She told me a bit about her town, and told me about some things to do there. I was getting a bit low inhibition at this point, thinking I had it all dialed in. So, I started posting photos of myself more often. Now, I actually already had a post with my face up, a post about my body dysmorphia, in fact, a post where I specifically mentioned my past of bone-smashing, a post that she actually liked! So, I figured it wouldn't be a problem. She even followed my personal account, which I legit had just made the night before. She was my first follower. I really thought I couldn't lose.
Well, I guess it was a pretty big problem, because she decided to COMPLETELY ignore the text I sent her on Wednesday, asking her to tell me about her day.
Are you serious? YOU messaged me first. YOU wanted to be friends with me. YOU were the one who decided to message me on your personal account. Now, you ignore me? I see her posting on another app, deleting the posts that barely get any attention. Is that more important than me? I don't get it, man. I'm not trying to be needy, but YOU wanted to be friends with ME. And then you just ignore me? Baffling. The fact is, once again, my subhumanity completely RUINED my chances at escaping this hell.
WHY DID I HAVE TO BE BORN SO UGLY? WHY DID I HAVE TO BE BORN AS A MAN, WITH A PENIS AND TESTICLES? I don't get it. I want to die, to be honest. I mean, it is completely over. There is nothing I can do to change my looks, looksmaxxing will barely change the fact that I am a subhuman piece of shit. I can't even MAKE FRIENDS because of my looks! I am so ugly that people don't even want to speak with me. The fact that I haven't roped yet is a testament to how strong I am, because I can guarantee the majority of incels would have roped because of this. But me? No. I continue on living, for some odd reason. I really don't understand why I still try. There is seriously no way I will ever be able to live the life I want to live, and it is all because I was born an incel, born the ugliest, most subhuman looking "human" being on the planet.
It is legitimately over for me. How can I ever recover?