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BigJimsWornOutTires
Kraken
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An alien lives among us. He's traveled the stars in technology that is beyond ours. He's aware of basic instruments and machines like stoves, microwaves, computers, vehicles, and even toys and mesmerizing light gadgets. Furthermore, he also comprehends the existence of countless diverse varieties of creatures and fungi. But there are things he's never seen before. And when he does, he can only assume from what he knows.
One evening, he's outside his home looking up at the stars. Something distracts him from ground level. It's two lights headed in his direction. He understands it's a ground vehicle. Most likely involving his human neighbors. And he's correct, as a car manifests and parks in front of the house adjacent to his. The front door of the residence of Mr. and Mrs. Clam opens. A girl steps outside in a long t-shirt barefooted. Ah, yes, his neighbor's slutty teenage daughter. A young man gets out of the vehicle. He walks to the girl. He presses his mouth against hers as she grabs his buttocks. The alien is alarmed! "Is that motherfucker eating her?" he ponders a dangerous idea.
We can't call the alien a fucking retard because he's traveled the stars in technology you couldn't conceive with that tiny moist cluster of parasitical worm inside your head you call a brain. He knows about shit you would think is of the imagination. If we compared you to him, you're the fucking retard in this scenario. Trust me! But from his planet and the ones he visited, species don't kiss. But some do eat one another. And a few he crossed paths with were known to start feasting from the mouth.