D
Deleted member 4209
therouxs me
- Joined
- Dec 4, 2019
- Posts
- 18,700
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Me (f25) and my wife(mtf27) have been together 4,5 years, we have monogamous marriage. I love her so much. She is the most perfect human being I know and she is the most beautiful, sexy, gorgeous woman I know.
She is still publicly presenting as him, which is taking a big toll on her mental health and dysmorpia. She admitted to me she feels dysphoric sometimes looking at other women or just looking at me. I know how much she is suffering but I can only truly imagine the pain she must feel.
I love her. I wanna be with her. I wanna be held by her, I wanna hold her. I wanna kiss her, I wanna be kissed by her. Yes, I also wanna make love with her. But she doesn’t want to even touch me because of how she feels. And I feel like a monster. Physical touch is my love language (and she knows it) and not being able to be with her physically is really hurting me. I don’t feel loved at all. I feel miserable and so unlovable. But at the same time I feel pathetic that I am crying over the fact she hasn’t touched me for weeks.
She is saying that once she gets on hormones she knows things will change and she might be comfortable again touching me (hug, holding hands, headpats etc). I just miss her so much. I miss stroking her hair or just holding her hand while we watch anime or movies. It really feels like it is consuming my heart in ache. And the worst part is that I am starting to feel resentful. And I hate myself for it. I know I am not the nicest to her sometimes and immediately regret it when I snap at her or when I am sarcastic too much towards her.
We talked and I told her the lack of physical contact is what is making me grow distant from her and she said that it is fair and she understands. But I still feel like such a villain
What can I do to stop wanting her that much? How can I suppress my emotions? I just really wanna get better for her.
She is still publicly presenting as him, which is taking a big toll on her mental health and dysmorpia. She admitted to me she feels dysphoric sometimes looking at other women or just looking at me. I know how much she is suffering but I can only truly imagine the pain she must feel.
I love her. I wanna be with her. I wanna be held by her, I wanna hold her. I wanna kiss her, I wanna be kissed by her. Yes, I also wanna make love with her. But she doesn’t want to even touch me because of how she feels. And I feel like a monster. Physical touch is my love language (and she knows it) and not being able to be with her physically is really hurting me. I don’t feel loved at all. I feel miserable and so unlovable. But at the same time I feel pathetic that I am crying over the fact she hasn’t touched me for weeks.
She is saying that once she gets on hormones she knows things will change and she might be comfortable again touching me (hug, holding hands, headpats etc). I just miss her so much. I miss stroking her hair or just holding her hand while we watch anime or movies. It really feels like it is consuming my heart in ache. And the worst part is that I am starting to feel resentful. And I hate myself for it. I know I am not the nicest to her sometimes and immediately regret it when I snap at her or when I am sarcastic too much towards her.
We talked and I told her the lack of physical contact is what is making me grow distant from her and she said that it is fair and she understands. But I still feel like such a villain
What can I do to stop wanting her that much? How can I suppress my emotions? I just really wanna get better for her.
leddit moment
