vratisevojvodo
My Dad is a War Criminal
- Joined
- Aug 11, 2024
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My wife & I have been married for a little over 6 years, together for 12. We have a 2 year old, and as many marriages do (or at least I think), things got a little stale. I love her, always have, I guess the passion had just sort of fizzled out. She was a stay-at-home Mom until things came to light, and I make good money but really don't like my job at all, but pressed on to support my family.
Day before Fathers Day she was up in the shower, her phone was unlocked so I was going to post something stupid on her facebook. When I opened it, a message popped up from an old friend of ours who moved away years ago....it was explicit to say the least. I started shaking, as I read the back & forth, and then the pictures, really explicit stuff. Talking about wanting each other, thinking about each other all the time, of course the language was way worse.
I went to go confront her after she got out of the shower, not much of a reaction from her at first, she followed me downstairs. She claimed that nothing had ever happened, they were both messed up in the head and were flirting/playing a game with each other. This did not smell right to me, I kept pressing and she kept swearing she was telling me the truth for a few hours, I asked to go back and look at everything in these facebook messages, she relented and said that she slept with him one time 8 years ago, before we were married but while we were engaged. He had tried to connect with her again a few times but she said no, he then moved 3,000 miles away.
I am a workaholic, I have high anxiety so I can be preoccupied, my mind will wander off even when I am home. I will be the first one to admit that I was not giving her the attention she deserved. Add to that we think she was dealing with some postpartum depression, and overall she was unhappy, communication is not a strength of hers however. I knew she was not happy, I did not know to what extent. This guy planned on coming to town and wanted to see her, that got them to talking, he never actually did make it out here however, things just escalated online (as far as I know), her story for the most part checks out.
She originally told me it was just a few (4) months, a few weeks after this all came to light I learned it was going on for 9 months, which hurt. I have been so unsure since this happened, slowly trying to build back trust and I think I am getting there.
She has gone back to work, we got our son in daycare which he loves, we are going to therapy individually & as a couple. I made a huge mistake and called this asshole a few weeks ago a few times, he never answered, figured out who was calling and texted/emailed/called my wife in the span of 10 minutes. Not going to lie, that shook me up, hearing his voice...she did share it all with me.
I love my wife, I want to keep my family intact, this obviously shook me to my core. I wonder if there is more to the story, if I know everything. Add to it that we have some close friends which is how we know this guy, and in his texts to my wife he inidicated that they all know about whats happened in the past, which makes me even more confused, are my friends keeping this from me all these years? I keep finding myself thinking about the pictures I saw, and the 2 of them together, its only been a few short months. Honestly things could be much, much worse, trying to cope is not easy.
Day before Fathers Day she was up in the shower, her phone was unlocked so I was going to post something stupid on her facebook. When I opened it, a message popped up from an old friend of ours who moved away years ago....it was explicit to say the least. I started shaking, as I read the back & forth, and then the pictures, really explicit stuff. Talking about wanting each other, thinking about each other all the time, of course the language was way worse.
I went to go confront her after she got out of the shower, not much of a reaction from her at first, she followed me downstairs. She claimed that nothing had ever happened, they were both messed up in the head and were flirting/playing a game with each other. This did not smell right to me, I kept pressing and she kept swearing she was telling me the truth for a few hours, I asked to go back and look at everything in these facebook messages, she relented and said that she slept with him one time 8 years ago, before we were married but while we were engaged. He had tried to connect with her again a few times but she said no, he then moved 3,000 miles away.
I am a workaholic, I have high anxiety so I can be preoccupied, my mind will wander off even when I am home. I will be the first one to admit that I was not giving her the attention she deserved. Add to that we think she was dealing with some postpartum depression, and overall she was unhappy, communication is not a strength of hers however. I knew she was not happy, I did not know to what extent. This guy planned on coming to town and wanted to see her, that got them to talking, he never actually did make it out here however, things just escalated online (as far as I know), her story for the most part checks out.
She originally told me it was just a few (4) months, a few weeks after this all came to light I learned it was going on for 9 months, which hurt. I have been so unsure since this happened, slowly trying to build back trust and I think I am getting there.
She has gone back to work, we got our son in daycare which he loves, we are going to therapy individually & as a couple. I made a huge mistake and called this asshole a few weeks ago a few times, he never answered, figured out who was calling and texted/emailed/called my wife in the span of 10 minutes. Not going to lie, that shook me up, hearing his voice...she did share it all with me.
I love my wife, I want to keep my family intact, this obviously shook me to my core. I wonder if there is more to the story, if I know everything. Add to it that we have some close friends which is how we know this guy, and in his texts to my wife he inidicated that they all know about whats happened in the past, which makes me even more confused, are my friends keeping this from me all these years? I keep finding myself thinking about the pictures I saw, and the 2 of them together, its only been a few short months. Honestly things could be much, much worse, trying to cope is not easy.
