Rhino LeFort
Bronze
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2024
- Posts
- 460
- Reputation
- 686
Hey everyone, I’m a new user here and I wanted to share my story of how I got here and some of my thoughts on BP. So I’ve had diagnosed body dysmorphia for years now. Once I hit middle school and I saw certain boys having more success with girls than others, I quickly realized that the ones that were better looking, lower inhib, etc tended to fare better with girls. I analyzed my own face and body became aware of the numerous flaws I had and became increasingly insecure, as I entered an awkward phase and on top of all my normal falios, I was starting to get face and body acne as well. This all came to a head when one day some mtb made a cruel remark about my acne, sending me into a depressive spiral that I have yet to come out of. As I got older my skin gradually cleared up, but a new insecurity always came up as soon as I overcame the previous one. As I hit high school and later college age, the BP only presented itself more in more, as men with the traits I listed previously (higher psl, lower inhib, etc) had much greater success and slayed at a younger age and more often than I thought possible. Around this time, a whole new variable was thrown into the mix: height. Height, as I’m sure you’re aware, plays an absolutely massive role in how you’re perceived by those around you, by both men and women, for better or for worse. I am 5’10 barefoot (around 179 cm for metric bhais), and live in America, so although I’m not a complete manlet, my height definitely didn’t do me any favors when it came to slaying. Around 4 years ago when I was still in high school, I discovered the YouTube channel Qoves Studio, I’m sure many of you are familiar with it. This was the BP for me before I ever even heard the term. I learned all about facial ratios, proportions, ideal and unideal features, the whole rabbit hole. This only escalated my BDD, as it provided a scientific and analytical base to back my insecurities so I couldn’t just cope with “muhhh nobody else notices that” etc. I’ve been lurking on .org for quite a while now with no account, just mainly sifting through offtopic and hearing opinions and stories from people I can actually relate to, which is a nice break from reality. The average person simply can’t understand what it’s like to be so insecure and body dysmorphic on a day to day basis. But people on .org can. It’s literally such fucking lifefuel. I’ve learned a lot and have a solid skincare regimen, better haircut, I eat pretty clean and I do little softmaxx bs like mewing/thumb pulling, shit like that. I’ve made some decent progress. I’ve been gymmaxxing hard, and I’m around 11-13ish% body fat, with a decent bit of lean muscle on my frame, nothing crazy though. I’m completely natural right now, not even creatine or any supps, but I think that will change soon. I haven’t measured my bidelt but it’s kinda average I’d say, not crazy wide but def not framecel. I get carried by my waist being relatively small (28in) making my shoulders look wide. Unfortunately, however, my face is asymmetrical as fuck. My eyes are a falio for no reason. I have naturally upturned dark colored eyebrows with blue/green A30 eyes. Not an ideal color but not bad and certainly not T50. I have literally no UEE in my left eye, but I have a bit in my right. However, I fear my left eye having none makes my right eye UEE look more pronounced. I have neutral/almost positive cancel tilt, but for some reason my left is more hooded than the right. Moving down to my nose, it’s a tad long and fucks up my midface (Italian genetics). However the greater issue is that it’s annoyingly wide and slightly bulbous from the front. From the side it’s actually kinda decent, it’s pretty straight and masculine. But the front profile as we know is more important than the side, and my nose’s wideness also throws off harmony with my eyes, further falio-ing them both. My lips are slightly above mid. The bottom lip is quite full, while the top lip is a pretty average fullness, which looks slightly disproportionate, especially from above angles. They could maybe stand to be a tad bit wider too. Speaking of wideness, I need my goddamn fucking gonions to FLARE THE FUCK OUTWARDS. Brutal falio, fucks up your mandible, maxilla, side profile etc. Also, for some reason the left side of my face is more forward grown than my right, despite having a slightly shorter ramus. Once again, super fucking asymmetrical. I was about to make my user AsymmetricalCel until I saw that was taken. ANYWAY, with all that out of the way, I wanted to talk about why I even made this account in the first place. The other day I retardedly decided to use the inverted camera on my face. This was a massive fucking mistake. I saw firsthand for the first time just how asymmetrical I really was. I also had kinda a Eureka moment. So remember how I said my left side was more forward grown and my left eye had lower UEE? Well, when my left eye and cheekbones are no longer mirrored to the left side of my face, I look significantly worse. Why? Well, after some research I discovered that people tend to read faces like books: left to right. Meaning, when someone looks at you, they are subconsciously focused more on the left side of your face more than your right. So my retard ass for my entire life didn’t realize that my alleged “good side” is actually on the right side (the less looked at side) of my face when people look at me. I’d look in the mirror and think “damn, I’m lowkey looking htn today, might go and mog some dalits at the mall”. Not fucking realizing I was mtn and not mogging shit. Literally I look an entire PSL point higher in a mirror. Honestly JFL at my ignorance. So anyway, if you’re asymmetrical to any degree, I would suggest flipping your camera and seeing how you look inverted. And if your good side is on the left like mine is, I’m sorry bro. It’s fucking over. Anyway, thank you for reading this if you did. Hope everyone is well.
TLDR: New user, glad to be here, I’m retarded, asymmetrical, and have no rizz
TLDR: New user, glad to be here, I’m retarded, asymmetrical, and have no rizz
