D
Deleted member 22918
Kraken
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2022
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- 15,189
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We have been together for almost 3 years now and they are great. I love her and she's the one and we plan on marrying each other once we are stable. We are not in a live-in relationship as her parents don't know about me yet but mine does and love her a lot. She has joined us for dinners too. We usually meet 2-3 times in a month mostly because of studies and assignments and what not!
So yesterday I was overthinking a lot about masturbating and all that stuff cause I've been doing it a lot lately and I wanted to stop , I've been feeling depressed all day due to several reasons so at night when we were texting she said she'll come over today after her college. Now we mostly make out whenever she visits my home. Sometimes we watch YouTube or a movie but we only have about One hour before she has to go home so that doesn't do a lot of help. She likes my mom a lot and vice versa , and they share a great bond so sometimes whenever she comes over we three just sit there and talk , well it's mostly just them and I'm sidelined there for awhile.
Today when she was coming from her college (in a bus) we had a small fight on the text over a silly thing. She has a cousin brother who stays in the neighbouring city was visiting them today and when she came to know about this she started considering ditching out plan to meet him. At first I told him yeah she can go and she said she will come over and that was good. We are transparent so I just told her that I felt a little bad she considered that and she does not prioritise me , she became furious and refused to listen to my explanation after this. And yeah , before all this too I asked her twice if she wanted to make out or not cause i know her and this has happened before , but she barely said anything about it. She recently had a whole period of like one or two month where she wasn't feeling sexually active and it felt really bad. And today as well it has been days since we last made out so I was kinda excited too and happy that she made this plan by herself (yesterday night).
She greeted my mom and then came into my room and we hugged for a while but then she started addressing the argument we had earlier while she was in the bus. I tried hugging her a few times and said sorry it wasn't what I meant (I told this to her on text too) but she was refusing to hug and stepped back whenever I proceeded. We both then went into the living room and chatted with my mom for a bit and then came back to my room to play guitar. She told me she's not in the mood to make out with a very exhausted and frustrated face as soon as we entered the room , I nodded and proceeded to make up the bed , we sat and she played guitar for a while. We were mostly very silent during this and we both cried 2-3 times and hugged. We kissed a few times too but the mood was very gloomy. In the back of my mind I wanted to make out with her but i wasn't forcing her it anything. We went into another argument (kinda) where she told me I'm not understanding, I told her I understood why she doesn't wanna make out but that doesn't mean I can't be sad about it. She told me we don't have to make out always and I agreed but told her that's why I asked her if she wanted it or not (over text) so that I won't be having any false hopes and could have arranged something else for us to do and also told her that we don't really get a chance to make out that often.
In the last like 10-15 minutes remaining she tried coming on top of me as well usually do but it felt very bad so I asked her to stop and don't force herself. We went back to the living room and she sat with my parents for a bit but has to go as her time was up. On our way out we kissed and hugged and apologized as well.
That was it. Honestly it felt very bad. I tried washing it off but I am a heavy overthinker so
..
Anyways thank you for reading. I'd appreciate your inputs
So yesterday I was overthinking a lot about masturbating and all that stuff cause I've been doing it a lot lately and I wanted to stop , I've been feeling depressed all day due to several reasons so at night when we were texting she said she'll come over today after her college. Now we mostly make out whenever she visits my home. Sometimes we watch YouTube or a movie but we only have about One hour before she has to go home so that doesn't do a lot of help. She likes my mom a lot and vice versa , and they share a great bond so sometimes whenever she comes over we three just sit there and talk , well it's mostly just them and I'm sidelined there for awhile.
Today when she was coming from her college (in a bus) we had a small fight on the text over a silly thing. She has a cousin brother who stays in the neighbouring city was visiting them today and when she came to know about this she started considering ditching out plan to meet him. At first I told him yeah she can go and she said she will come over and that was good. We are transparent so I just told her that I felt a little bad she considered that and she does not prioritise me , she became furious and refused to listen to my explanation after this. And yeah , before all this too I asked her twice if she wanted to make out or not cause i know her and this has happened before , but she barely said anything about it. She recently had a whole period of like one or two month where she wasn't feeling sexually active and it felt really bad. And today as well it has been days since we last made out so I was kinda excited too and happy that she made this plan by herself (yesterday night).
She greeted my mom and then came into my room and we hugged for a while but then she started addressing the argument we had earlier while she was in the bus. I tried hugging her a few times and said sorry it wasn't what I meant (I told this to her on text too) but she was refusing to hug and stepped back whenever I proceeded. We both then went into the living room and chatted with my mom for a bit and then came back to my room to play guitar. She told me she's not in the mood to make out with a very exhausted and frustrated face as soon as we entered the room , I nodded and proceeded to make up the bed , we sat and she played guitar for a while. We were mostly very silent during this and we both cried 2-3 times and hugged. We kissed a few times too but the mood was very gloomy. In the back of my mind I wanted to make out with her but i wasn't forcing her it anything. We went into another argument (kinda) where she told me I'm not understanding, I told her I understood why she doesn't wanna make out but that doesn't mean I can't be sad about it. She told me we don't have to make out always and I agreed but told her that's why I asked her if she wanted it or not (over text) so that I won't be having any false hopes and could have arranged something else for us to do and also told her that we don't really get a chance to make out that often.
In the last like 10-15 minutes remaining she tried coming on top of me as well usually do but it felt very bad so I asked her to stop and don't force herself. We went back to the living room and she sat with my parents for a bit but has to go as her time was up. On our way out we kissed and hugged and apologized as well.
That was it. Honestly it felt very bad. I tried washing it off but I am a heavy overthinker so
..
Anyways thank you for reading. I'd appreciate your inputs
