Narcissus🥀
{✨$yrian Chad }[:«❤️»:]{ Lover★boy✨}
- Joined
- Sep 3, 2023
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I'm 19 years old, during those 19 years of my life I've never talked to my biological grandfather, never met him and don't even know what he looks like.
All I know is that he lived a comfortable life in Saudi Arabia away from my destroyed country Syria, and now is almost 100 years old (mid nineties)
All of a sudden my dad is excited, he is talking to his father on the phone.
Everyone went and talked to him, but I didn't.
I don't want to know him, I just don't understand how he is living his life in Mecca praying everyday when his own grandchild have never seen him.
It's not like I need his help because I don't, it's just that I don't understand...
If I had kids or descendants or any of that I'd search god's green earth for them, no money no nothing, and I'd still find them.
My father was in the military when I was in middle school, no father/ big brother figure in my life, I was bullied and humiliated everyday.
What did my sisters say when I told them? That I'm a wimp.
Meanwhile that man was living his life away from his family.
And now he suddenly becomes my grandfather?? No.
I needed him when I was getting beat up everyday and my father was in war, but now I'm goddamn sure I don't need him.
He married another woman while his wife was dying of sickness with her children crying for her, and then he married a third, with no care about his offsprings.
I will become the exact opposite of that man when I grow up to be a father, I will never leave my kids and I'll always be there for them, how the fuck could I not be??
I'm just incapable of comprehending how a man could leave away his family
I swear my children will live the best life anyone could live, I will try my hardest to make that real.
All I know is that he lived a comfortable life in Saudi Arabia away from my destroyed country Syria, and now is almost 100 years old (mid nineties)
All of a sudden my dad is excited, he is talking to his father on the phone.
Everyone went and talked to him, but I didn't.
I don't want to know him, I just don't understand how he is living his life in Mecca praying everyday when his own grandchild have never seen him.
It's not like I need his help because I don't, it's just that I don't understand...
If I had kids or descendants or any of that I'd search god's green earth for them, no money no nothing, and I'd still find them.
My father was in the military when I was in middle school, no father/ big brother figure in my life, I was bullied and humiliated everyday.
What did my sisters say when I told them? That I'm a wimp.
Meanwhile that man was living his life away from his family.
And now he suddenly becomes my grandfather?? No.
I needed him when I was getting beat up everyday and my father was in war, but now I'm goddamn sure I don't need him.
He married another woman while his wife was dying of sickness with her children crying for her, and then he married a third, with no care about his offsprings.
I will become the exact opposite of that man when I grow up to be a father, I will never leave my kids and I'll always be there for them, how the fuck could I not be??
I'm just incapable of comprehending how a man could leave away his family
I swear my children will live the best life anyone could live, I will try my hardest to make that real.
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