Loruki
Ascending Stars
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2023
- Posts
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Growing up from when I was 6, my dad was always arguing with my mom. My sister and I would always see it since we were growing up. They became divorced when I was like 7. My dad slaved his entire life during school, then didn't even land a good job. He wageslaved for his entire life & developed health issues such as obesity & diabetes. He is very controlling & abusive.
From me just being 6 years old, he would physically hurt me and yell at me for no reason. I would cry most of my life. Whenever I refused to learn things, he would resort to physical violence and starve me.
This was on and off. I developed social anxiety and selective mutism because of this. I didn't have many friends. I became psychotic and sick in the head. The desire to kill and dismember others. Permanent damage to my nervous system.
At the time, I thought it was normal. Seeing others who looked so happy made me realize my life was terrible.
All the crying growing up, made me mouth breathe and have poor posture for a long ass time.
The thought of even seeing my dad made me have panic attacks and random heart palpations. I was scared because I always expect him to physically and verbally hurt me.
When I turned 12, I would be manipulative of others and tell them to kill themselves. I would hurt others around me. I would get into detention and into trouble often.
Whenever it came to girls, I would reject them because I thought that they were weird. But as I grew older, I regretted my decisions..
When I hit 13 years old, I found the blackpill through chico, sean, and barrett.
From me just being 6 years old, he would physically hurt me and yell at me for no reason. I would cry most of my life. Whenever I refused to learn things, he would resort to physical violence and starve me.
This was on and off. I developed social anxiety and selective mutism because of this. I didn't have many friends. I became psychotic and sick in the head. The desire to kill and dismember others. Permanent damage to my nervous system.
At the time, I thought it was normal. Seeing others who looked so happy made me realize my life was terrible.
All the crying growing up, made me mouth breathe and have poor posture for a long ass time.
The thought of even seeing my dad made me have panic attacks and random heart palpations. I was scared because I always expect him to physically and verbally hurt me.
When I turned 12, I would be manipulative of others and tell them to kill themselves. I would hurt others around me. I would get into detention and into trouble often.
Whenever it came to girls, I would reject them because I thought that they were weird. But as I grew older, I regretted my decisions..
When I hit 13 years old, I found the blackpill through chico, sean, and barrett.
Now that I'm turning 15 soon, I don't know what to do with my life.
I have the following shit 
- Craniofacial dystrophy
- Hyperthyroidism
- Sleep Apnea
- Asymmetry
- Vision problems
- Selective mutism
- Autism
- Social Anxiety
Now, I still live with my dad & go house to house here and there.
My dad always repeats the following every fucking day since i was 10 years old to this day
"Why can't you be more like your sister?"
"Why can't you just fucking study and stop wasting your fucking time"
"Are you depressed?"
"Do you need to go to ER so they can pump you full of drugs?"
"Do you need to see a psychiatrist?"
"Why won't you fucking speak to me?"
"Why are you failing your classes?"
"Why do you eat like a homeless faggot?"
"Wipe your fucking nose! Stop crying!"
"Go to bed and sleep! You won't amount to anything."
"You will be a minimum wage worker."
"People are getting ahead of you while you sit here and do nothing."
"You can't survive high school without taking drugs to be able to focus and function properly"
"You need to eat carbs, plants and fruits. You can't just eat meat and eggs all day. You will get a heart attack and die."
"Girls don't like poor guys. Girls leave good looking guys and settle for not so good looking guys with money."
"Stop trying to recreate the wheel"
"Your way won't work. You have to do it my way or you will end up homeless with no job"
"Do you want me to call 911 and put you in a mental institution?"
"NO! Starbucks is processed."
He is so hypocritical. He eats junk food & watches faggot AI videos all day long. He got laid off his job and is taking out all his anger on me. He always does this. I'm sick and tired of this. My life has been nothing but utter shit & loneliness.
Because of his obesity and diabetes, he said NO! to eggs and mostly all dairy when I was growing up. He would rather feed me processed goyslop than actual real food I needed to grow.
He'd rather feed me McDonalds and fast food places than dairy. Now he tells me not to eat processed food, then tells me to eat carbohydrates which say refined. Whenever I try to eat meat or eggs, he would say NO.
I grew up malnourished with poor posture, respiratory and brain issues.
This is a consequence of thinking it was okay to have a child without knowing how to raise one.
When I have a child, I will do the complete opposite and stop this stupid shit from happening. I'd rather be not so wealthy with good looks & be happy than to live in comfort while being constantly depressed and abused.
TLDR: My dad was abusive & I grew up shit. It could have been better. My sister has anxiety but not as bad as me because my dad favored her because she listened and slaved away her childhood. I'm a very emotional person now. He still treated us like shit & thinks he can make up for it now. Too Late.
- Craniofacial dystrophy
- Hyperthyroidism
- Sleep Apnea
- Asymmetry
- Vision problems
- Selective mutism
- Autism
- Social Anxiety
Now, I still live with my dad & go house to house here and there.
My dad always repeats the following every fucking day since i was 10 years old to this day
"Why can't you be more like your sister?"
"Why can't you just fucking study and stop wasting your fucking time"
"Are you depressed?"
"Do you need to go to ER so they can pump you full of drugs?"
"Do you need to see a psychiatrist?"
"Why won't you fucking speak to me?"
"Why are you failing your classes?"
"Why do you eat like a homeless faggot?"
"Wipe your fucking nose! Stop crying!"
"Go to bed and sleep! You won't amount to anything."
"You will be a minimum wage worker."
"People are getting ahead of you while you sit here and do nothing."
"You can't survive high school without taking drugs to be able to focus and function properly"
"You need to eat carbs, plants and fruits. You can't just eat meat and eggs all day. You will get a heart attack and die."
"Girls don't like poor guys. Girls leave good looking guys and settle for not so good looking guys with money."
"Stop trying to recreate the wheel"
"Your way won't work. You have to do it my way or you will end up homeless with no job"
"Do you want me to call 911 and put you in a mental institution?"
"NO! Starbucks is processed."
He is so hypocritical. He eats junk food & watches faggot AI videos all day long. He got laid off his job and is taking out all his anger on me. He always does this. I'm sick and tired of this. My life has been nothing but utter shit & loneliness.
Because of his obesity and diabetes, he said NO! to eggs and mostly all dairy when I was growing up. He would rather feed me processed goyslop than actual real food I needed to grow.
He'd rather feed me McDonalds and fast food places than dairy. Now he tells me not to eat processed food, then tells me to eat carbohydrates which say refined. Whenever I try to eat meat or eggs, he would say NO.
I grew up malnourished with poor posture, respiratory and brain issues.
This is a consequence of thinking it was okay to have a child without knowing how to raise one.
When I have a child, I will do the complete opposite and stop this stupid shit from happening. I'd rather be not so wealthy with good looks & be happy than to live in comfort while being constantly depressed and abused.
TLDR: My dad was abusive & I grew up shit. It could have been better. My sister has anxiety but not as bad as me because my dad favored her because she listened and slaved away her childhood. I'm a very emotional person now. He still treated us like shit & thinks he can make up for it now. Too Late.
@Never Get Up @soggra @rrm_ss2 @puffer234234 @superpsycho
